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#253921 - 10/09/08 02:17 PM i wish i were dead trigger warrining
feelingafraid Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 04/08/08
Posts: 76
Loc: 5,471 FT above sea level
im not suicidal

life is something that others have
I can only sit and watch
I live in a world of pain and heart ache
death looks inviting
the end of sorrow and pain
i long for someone to just make it all go away
hope is some thing for others
all i know if destrution and pain
i can't give love only pain
tears flow
why can't i be like the others happy and normal
why do i long for death



Edited by feelingafraid (10/09/08 02:31 PM)
_________________________
Hes a little boy let him be a little boy for the boy we never got to be.
Timmy

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#254375 - 10/11/08 07:41 AM Re: i wish i were dead trigger warrining [Re: feelingafraid]
roadrunner Offline
Administrator Emeritus
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 05/02/05
Posts: 22045
Loc: Carlisle, PA
Toby,

I remember this feeling. In San Francisco I used to wake up in the morning (or whenever) and feel instant regret at the fact that I was still alive.

But that's the heavy weight of abuse grinding us down, my friend. We all have so much to be and so much to give. One day I know you will see this.

Much love,
Larry

_________________________
Nobody living can ever stop me
As I go walking my freedom highway.
Nobody living can make me turn back:
This land was made for you and me.
(Woody Guthrie)

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#255772 - 10/17/08 11:36 AM Re: i wish i were dead trigger warrining [Re: roadrunner]
TNT8lost Offline


Registered: 09/25/08
Posts: 18
Loc: OK, USA
Your not alone in this thinking. I don't know that there is anything encouraging for me to say but that people here understand and will listen.

_________________________
Thomas T.

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#255933 - 10/18/08 01:32 AM Re: i wish i were dead trigger warrining [Re: feelingafraid]
petercorbett Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 07/27/08
Posts: 2434
Loc: TEXAS
Hey feeling afraid, come on, get with it, Stop beating your self up about a lost childhood, all of us in this web site and on these pages are afraid, now for me I'll only wish that those abuse memories would die. I've just made the transition from VICTIM to Survivior. May I suggest that you read the book Victims No Longer. I don't want you to die or anyone else in these pages. For to die (for me) before I become a complete survivior means that my perps won. I'm 69 yrs old, and I ain't in any hurry wishing I were dead. Come on, we'll all help you, with your pain, we'll give you unconditional compassion, understanding and love. Life is worth living. Come on with us.
Heal well my friends.
Pete (Irishmoose)

_________________________
Working Boys' Home 10-14 yrs old, grades 5-8. 1949-1953
____________________________________________________________
A very humble alumni of the WOR Dahlonega, GA.
May 15-17 2009, Alta, Sep. 2009. Sequoia, 2010.
Hope Springs, 2010.


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