834: {skool intercom buzzes to life...for some reason they blow on the mike) Ffffff-Ffffff....I just want everyone to know that Robert Brown ruinded _________ for everyone for the remainder of the skool-year.

835: No matter WHAT year of graduation or your grade, your class "is the worst bunch of evil children with NO respect this skool has ever seen." My 13-yo son's class is keeping the race alive. HIS class is the current "worst ever." I'm SO happy to be rid of that vile distinction. HA!!! In your FACE Miss Habbernake!!!!! My SON is WORSE than I was....ever!!!!!

836: Even after 40 years, Baker's Unsweetened Chocolate blocks STILL taste SO BAD, even if they are melted-in with butter. Someone needs to get Baker's to put a "Warning For Boys: Don't eat these, they taste SO BAD you might actually DIE! They are for adult women to use for cooking...not for eating straight!!!" on the box.

837.

When your mom is having a party for her friends upstairs and you are not supposed to appear, don't make stink bombs in the basement.

Puffer

Sulfur-based stink bombs? Or the plutonium type (my favorite).

Hey good ol' road runner. I miss your posts.

838. When their parents are having guests to dinner, little boys should not cut giant farts.

Puffer

839. Baby boys should not finger paint the wallpaper behind their crib with excrement.

Puffer

840. Toddler boys should not come downstairs naked when their parents are entertaining guests.

Puffer

I needed this laugh!
841. Don't have a BB gun fight with the kid who just got a new CO2 powered pistol.
842. Those CO2 powered pistols do not hold only six rounds like the real gun they are trying to appear like.
843. A BB, at ten pumps, to the forehead will stop the kid with a CO2 powered pistol.
844. Old asphalt shingles are part frisbe, throwing star(go ninja power), physics defying(at least my knowledge then), could leave instant road rash (even through a t-shirt) and everywhere I thought it was safe; it was not.
845. A bicycle wreck was and acceptable explanation for any injury.
846. When a parent smokes, do not pick a can of anything up and drink it, unless you have opened it while guarding it to completion.

847: Kid Cuisine microwave dinners always taste like the box they came in.

848: Kid Cuisine dinner elements never stay in their respective little compartments in the tray, resulting in brownie covered in mac n cheese.

849: Kid Cuisine dinners were an easy way to feed the kid who's home alone, since he's not allowed to turn on the stove.