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#25394 - 08/18/05 01:39 AM Re: Mike Lew Retreat Question
Splitting Offline
Member

Registered: 12/26/04
Posts: 62
I to was at Kirkridge last weekend. It was the first of an annual pilgrimage for me. To actually be present while miracles unfold before you is a priceless gift.

Mike has an incredible gift of making the participants feel safe, loved, and secure, while making sure that all boundaries are observed. This retreat was the first time I have ever felt safe.

As good as Mike is at the leadership, it is the guys who make the retreat. They are real. They are the only ones that can truly appreciate the hell that a survivor endures because they are a survivor themselves. I thoroughly enjoyed meeting ScottyTodd, CFODave, and Lostinpa.

Hope this helps!


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#25395 - 08/18/05 02:32 AM Re: Mike Lew Retreat Question
onlyakid Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 03/31/04
Posts: 1552
Loc: New Jersey
Dave,
I probably should explain why I left for you and the other people there. I let my fear get the best of me. I have a social anxiety so everytime I had to interact in small groups and they weren't assigned, I isolated myself. Its nothing personal, everytime I did interact with people, I had a good time. The problem those were few and far between.

_________________________
"Being with people that understand you...Priceless"

"and i don't want the world to see me, cause i don't think that they'd understand"

"You don't know what love is...you just do as your told"

"My life has changed. What you take as a simple thing, is not so simple for me anymore"


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#25396 - 08/18/05 05:11 AM Re: Mike Lew Retreat Question
DP Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 08/18/05
Posts: 9
Loc: Granby MA
Has anyone actually done therapy with Mike?

I attended the Workshop at Kirkridge this past weekend, and yes, we missed you at the closing Jason...

_________________________
There is a place in every heart where fear turns to courage...and courage takes flight.
Radio Flyers

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#25397 - 08/18/05 03:32 PM Re: Mike Lew Retreat Question
ScottyTodd Offline
Administrator Emeritus
MaleSurvivor
Registered: 02/12/03
Posts: 1561
Loc: Pennsylvania
Hey Guys!! It was really great to see who I was talking to on MS this last weekend! Yes, the weekend pivots soooo much on the guys who attend! The whole sense of accomplishment, meeting goals and seeing other guys make such headway in their recovery makes the weekend very special for me. Thanks to everyone who openly owned their MS activities!!

No, I've not known anyone who used Next Step Counseling (Mike & Tom's counseling center). I would try it for myself only because I've seen and experienced Mike's compassion and watched his insight with survivors over the weekends.

Keep safe, guys!! I look forward to posting with you in the future!

Howard

PS: Jason, we all move at our own pace. Never apologize for too slow or too fast as long as you are able to handle the pace and recovery is working for you!! Take care of yourself!!

_________________________
If you think you can or you can't - you're right!.......anon
It's never too late to have a happy childhood!.....anon
You're very normal for the abnormal situation you've been through..............S. Todd

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#25398 - 08/18/05 07:02 PM Re: Mike Lew Retreat Question
chuck Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 04/30/03
Posts: 97
Loc: mid atlantic
Jason,

I was glad you did force yourself to attend the retreat at Kirkbridge, because it was my first weekend also with Mike. Yes I had great anxieties about the weekend but it was good and I did have anxious moments about the small group discussions. There were moments during the discussions that I did disassociate becasue the story might have been to close to mine and paniked me.

Did anyone take Mike's stress test that he handed out in the last session? If you haven't you should go to the site for the test, because it is very telling about stress.

Chuck


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#25399 - 08/19/05 07:39 PM Re: Mike Lew Retreat Question
CFO Dave Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 08/14/04
Posts: 104
Loc: Millis MA
Hey,

Splitting, and Chuck, will you guys pm me and let me know who you are? Did we introduce ourselves as fellow board members?

DP, I do know who you are. BTW, I had that song in my head all week. Congrats for having the strength to go there given the other sudden family obligation. I hope that all went well. My thoughts were with you.

I'm seriously considering switching to Mike for my individual therapy. Thom is my group therapy leader. It really helps to be in Boston. I do know someone who was at Kirkridge, lives in MA and has Mike as his therapist. There were only 4 of us from MA and it's not DP or me so that narrows it down.

_________________________
"We deceive ourselves when we fancy that only weakness needs support. Strength needs it far more."
-Madame Swetchine

"The soul that is within me no man can degrade."
-Frederick Douglas

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#25400 - 08/19/05 10:29 PM Re: Mike Lew Retreat Question
Carlo Offline
Junior Member

Registered: 08/19/05
Posts: 2
Loc: Boston
DP,

We did not have a conversation at Kirkridge but I know who you are. I have been doing private therapy with Mike for 3-4 years. I have been in a mens group facilitated by Thom for 2-3 years. The best testimonial I can offer is that with Mike's guidance I have been able to cast off some addictive and destructive behavior and thoughts to reveal an authentic me. I am starting to like who I am.

If you care to send me a pm I'd be happy to answer any questions you might have.

Take good care,

_________________________
Carlo

'Let somebody love you before its too late'

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#25401 - 08/20/05 02:03 AM Re: Mike Lew Retreat Question
DP Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 08/18/05
Posts: 9
Loc: Granby MA
Thank you...everyone.

I thought, well, let's see where this goes...the "entertainment exercise" at the Workshop allowed me to risk something there. The "active expression" LOL, funny de>
_________________________
There is a place in every heart where fear turns to courage...and courage takes flight.
Radio Flyers

Top
#25402 - 08/20/05 03:08 PM Re: Mike Lew Retreat Question
Carlo Offline
Junior Member

Registered: 08/19/05
Posts: 2
Loc: Boston
DP,

Geez - Granby to Boston is a 'hike and a half'. I'd worry that the travel time puts a lot of pressure on the session - like I better get my money's/time's worth out of this! I don't want to add to your stress but I feel compelled to point out that Mike runs a very professional session. He's a start-on-time, end-on-time, 50 minute hour guy. He keeps the small-talk 'how about this weather' stuff to one line. He will not regale you with his stories. It is your session. What is great is that you do not have to explain anything to him - this is one guy that you can count on to 'get it'. I never thought of this until now but it is also eminently safe in that room. There are things I can tell him that I had not had the courage to tell myself.

Traffic. I see Mike at 8 in the morning. Going with the traffic it takes me 1.5 hrs to get in - 50 minutes out. My mens group at the same location is at 6 at night. Same thing 1.5 hrs in - 50 minutes out. If you are coming with the traffic you should give yourself an extra half hour just for the stretch from the Mass Pike @ 95 to his office.

Good luck.

Take good care,

_________________________
Carlo

'Let somebody love you before its too late'

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#25403 - 08/20/05 06:23 PM Re: Mike Lew Retreat Question
DP Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 08/18/05
Posts: 9
Loc: Granby MA
Which is exactly what I'm hoping for...I've never worked with a therapist that had any real knowledge beyond what I was trying to tell them. For the opportunity to skip over the "this is why I feel this way..." and be able to simply talk...is well worth the drive. Yea, Boston traffic sucks...but I drove a semi in Boston...I think my little Explorer'll get through. Thank you very much for the advice though, it is greatly appreciated.
When we set it up I requested a two hour time slot. That'll more than make up for the travel time...and maybe even time enough to talk about the weather, too.

Thanks, Carlo...


Dave

_________________________
There is a place in every heart where fear turns to courage...and courage takes flight.
Radio Flyers

Top
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