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#253626 - 10/08/08 02:47 PM Anybody else hate going to the barber?
LandOfShadow Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 12/11/07
Posts: 684
Loc: Minneapolis, Minnesota USA
I saw a pamphlet about survivor difficulties with medical exams, but for me, I think the barber is worse. I feel so trapped and violated. I can't what he's doing to my hair and with my glasses off, I can't see much of anything else.

Anyone else?

_________________________
Et par le pouvoir d’un mot Je recommence ma vie, Je suis né pour te connaître, Pour te nommer
Liberté

And by the power of a single word I can begin my life again, I was born to know you, to name you
Freedom

Paul Eluard

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#253634 - 10/08/08 03:01 PM Re: Anybody else hate going to the barber? [Re: LandOfShadow]
M3 Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 09/04/07
Posts: 1392
Loc: Central Ohio
I've always had females cut my hair until my last haircut. But lucky for me, my boyfriend is a stylist. I felt safe with him. The women never bothered me.


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#253636 - 10/08/08 03:06 PM Re: Anybody else hate going to the barber? [Re: M3]
sunwolf Offline


Registered: 09/20/08
Posts: 225
Loc: Indiana
I hate gong to the dentist not the barber i like my hair washed and cut in a nice way...:)


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#253638 - 10/08/08 03:07 PM Re: Anybody else hate going to the barber? [Re: LandOfShadow]
Trucker51 Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 05/20/08
Posts: 2826
Loc: Denver, CO
Back in the day I used to get my hair cut once a year and I hated going so much. It felt like my whole view of myself, my social standing, and my personality was in someone else's hands, and I hated to give up that control or submit to someone else's idea of what I should look like. I am very nearsighted and wear thick glasses. I didn't like dentist appointments either nor any doctor's appointment where any of my clothing had to come off.

These days I'm going to the barber maybe once every two months and I have a hot-looking younger female doctor, but I still really dislike going to the dentist. My doctor and her office staff always find it funny when I ask for more Cialis samples but these days I can laugh along with them. I tell them that my insurance company thinks that Cialis is a recreational drug.

So yes, I know what you are talking about with your hair and the barber.

Mark

_________________________
"We stay here, we die here. We've got to keep moving". Trucker Mark



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#253640 - 10/08/08 03:10 PM Re: Anybody else hate going to the barber? [Re: Trucker51]
sunwolf Offline


Registered: 09/20/08
Posts: 225
Loc: Indiana
I have come a long way..my brother and my cousin (i had long hair then) liked to pull my hair while they were molesting me...but now i like my hair and loves to be panmpered


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#253641 - 10/08/08 03:11 PM Re: Anybody else hate going to the barber? [Re: Trucker51]
AndyJB2005 Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 11/14/06
Posts: 1242
Loc: Saint Paul, Minnesota
I wouldn't mind the barber if there wasn't forced conversation between the stylist and myself. That's the part I hate -- and it's uncomfy for both genders, but for me, male is worse. I don't know them, they don't know me -- and I like them and all but lets just cut hair here. LOL

Dentist is worst place on Earth for me. Probably why I haven't been in so long even though I should.

_________________________
Life's disappointments are harder to take when you don't know any swear words. -- Calvin (Calvin and Hobbes)

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#253643 - 10/08/08 03:14 PM Re: Anybody else hate going to the barber? [Re: AndyJB2005]
sunwolf Offline


Registered: 09/20/08
Posts: 225
Loc: Indiana
my MD is good...we have talked a bit about my abuse,,he understands...thats the cause of my anxiety and my fears...but i still have issues in taking my clothes off in front of him...


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#253668 - 10/08/08 05:08 PM Re: Anybody else hate going to the barber? [Re: sunwolf]
pufferfish Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/26/08
Posts: 6810
Loc: USA
My barber when I was ten through fifteen had a curious way of rubbing his crotch against my arms as I sat in the chair. I moved my arm away. I tried to pretend it didn't mean anything.

Allen

puffer



Edited by pufferfish (10/09/08 11:26 AM)

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#253728 - 10/08/08 08:03 PM Re: Anybody else hate going to the barber? [Re: pufferfish]
roadrunner Offline
Administrator Emeritus
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 05/02/05
Posts: 22045
Loc: Carlisle, PA
I am okay dealing with doctors now. I just tell them I'm a survivor of CSA and they all seem to "get it". It wasn't easy to do at first, of course, but after awhile you get used to it.

But barbers ... that one still troubles me. I hate it when the guy takes hold of my head, and somehow I figure there's a big difference between disclosing to your doctor and disclosing to your barber.

Much love,
Larry

_________________________
Nobody living can ever stop me
As I go walking my freedom highway.
Nobody living can make me turn back:
This land was made for you and me.
(Woody Guthrie)

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#253739 - 10/08/08 08:45 PM Re: Anybody else hate going to the barber? [Re: roadrunner]
lungfish Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 09/26/08
Posts: 64
Loc: nowhere special nj
I don't like anything where i have to give up any control. I grew my hair long for most of my life. A few years ago I decided to cut it and served as my own barber or talked my friend who is a dog groomer to cut it. Sure I looked like a mental patient but that pretty close to the truth at that time. I recently found an old school barber that is run by a young guy. We talk about guns, politics and stupid NJ laws. I like it. I tell him to make me look like a cop and I feel like me gives me this awesome disguise of an average normal productive citizen. I'm rambling, what I'm trying to say is shop around till you find one you like. I travel a half and hour but I don't dread it. Pete

_________________________
"What lies behind us and what lies before us are tiny matters compared to what lies within us." Ralph Waldo Emerson

Personally I'm always ready to learn, although I do not always like to be taught. -Sir Winston Churchill

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