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#253471 - 10/07/08 08:57 PM WHAT THE HELL?
OKIE MIKE Offline
Member

Registered: 02/13/04
Posts: 982
Loc: HULBERT OK
Whay the hell ? I have been seeing a theropst for sense 2001 at the Veterans Hospital In Muskogee. I REAPEDALY Asked about a Military Sexual Trama group. They have told me that there is a group but it is limited to female only. They do not have a group for males . I found out that there are almost 20,000 military sexula trama victoms that are currently being councled in the VA system . You cant honestly tell me that I am the only Male That is being councled in Muskogee
I started looking on the internet for help.
I found Greg Helle the auther of "A Walk in Hell" this is a book about a Vet-Nam veteran that was raped while in The U.S.Army. I also was raped while I was in the Army.
Through him I found about Male Survivors And I have ben here for several years.I have used this group for the support. Because The VA said that they had no group for male rape victoms.
I have ben fighting to have my PTSD rateing rased above 30%
Reacently I recieved a Denial letter that said that one of the reasons fo the dinial was that I was useing a Male sexual trama group that is outside of the VA system.
They told me that they dod not have a Male sexual trama group. So I found help where I could.
I also found out on MY OWN that a male sexual trama inpatent program DOES exist within the VA system.
I have filed a disagrement through the DAV
There is no reasom fo this . the Va should tell veterans what help is avadable to them .

_________________________
MICHAEL

"I HAD NO SHOES THEN I SAW A MAN THAT HAD NO FEET"

"All I can do is be me, whoever that is"

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#253473 - 10/07/08 09:05 PM Re: WHAT THE HELL? [Re: OKIE MIKE]
Marinan Offline
Guest

Registered: 07/03/07
Posts: 329
I'm so sorry Mike. \:\( Thank you for being in our service.


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#253565 - 10/08/08 10:02 AM Re: WHAT THE HELL? [Re: Marinan]
M3 Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 09/04/07
Posts: 1392
Loc: Central Ohio
Yeah Mike, I hate the way we treat our Vets.


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#253605 - 10/08/08 02:02 PM Re: WHAT THE HELL? [Re: M3]
OKIE MIKE Offline
Member

Registered: 02/13/04
Posts: 982
Loc: HULBERT OK
There is something wrong with a system that punishes a Veteran for seeking help. When they do not offer help in the VA system. So I looked for help where I could find it.
I know that I am not the only Male Veteran, that was raped while serving His country . Why do they refuse to help male rape victoms?

_________________________
MICHAEL

"I HAD NO SHOES THEN I SAW A MAN THAT HAD NO FEET"

"All I can do is be me, whoever that is"

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#253630 - 10/08/08 02:57 PM Re: WHAT THE HELL? [Re: OKIE MIKE]
LN3(SS) Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 06/20/08
Posts: 486
Loc: MD
Mike,

If you don't trust the DAV to do all the legwork, the National Veterans Legal Service Project puts out a thing called the "Veterans Benefit Manual". It's the same book that is used to train your NSO and is chock full of info on how to appeal your claim. It costs $135 plus S&H.

Also, Mic Hunter wrote a book called "Honor Betrayed: Sexual Abuse In Anerica's Military". The book was highly triggering for me, but it might be of comfort to you. I dunno. You can order that through Barnes & Noble.

Make sure you get your counselor to sign a statement as to what she has been advising you to what your treatment options are there. You WILL be needing that!

The whole name of the game when dealing with the Government is CYA. Paper works wonders when doing so. You got a vet here that will gladly help you.

Brian

_________________________
"When we go into battle, I will be the first to set foot on the field, and I will be the last to step off, and I will leave no one behind. Dead, or alive, we will all come home together." LTG Hal Moore, Jr., USA (Ret.)

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#253687 - 10/08/08 06:24 PM Re: WHAT THE HELL? [Re: LN3(SS)]
blueshift Offline
Guest

Registered: 01/21/08
Posts: 1242
Loc: infinity
I haven't heard a good thing about the VA yet! They don't seem to be sufficient at all to the demand they are supposed to meet. From all I've heard it doesn't surprise me that they are like this with male abuse victims. Eventually maybe the news will come around to them that there actually are male rape victims.


_________________________
My Story
My Art

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#253811 - 10/09/08 02:23 AM Re: WHAT THE HELL? [Re: blueshift]
OKIE MIKE Offline
Member

Registered: 02/13/04
Posts: 982
Loc: HULBERT OK
Blue shift , Unfortunately the VA is verry understafed.Rite now they are dealing with veterans that are returning from Iraq & Afghanistan. They are dealing with Combat trama. and male sexual trama is a low priority . Because they are still tring to sweep people like me under the rug . But I am like a stinking peice of Shit that will not go away . Until They treat Male victoms the same as female victoms. I am going to keep makeing a big stink.

_________________________
MICHAEL

"I HAD NO SHOES THEN I SAW A MAN THAT HAD NO FEET"

"All I can do is be me, whoever that is"

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#253814 - 10/09/08 02:57 AM Re: WHAT THE HELL? [Re: OKIE MIKE]
Stretch73 Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 06/27/08
Posts: 336
Loc: Sea Isle City, NJ
Interesting facts about the Tomb of the Unknown Soldier and the Sentinels of the Third United States Infantry Regiment "Old Guard"
How many steps does the guard take during his walk across the tomb of the Unknowns and why?
21 steps. It alludes to the twenty-one gun salute, which is the highest honor given any military or foreign dignitary.

How long does he hesitate after his about face to begin his return walk and why?
21 seconds, for the same reason as answer number 1.

Why are his gloves wet?
His gloves are moistened to prevent his losing his grip on the rifle.

Does he carry his rifle on the same shoulder all the time, and if not, why not?
No, he carries the rifle on the shoulder away from the tomb. After his march across the path, he executes an about face and moves the rifle to the outside shoulder.

How often are the guards changed?
Guards are changed every thirty minutes, twenty-four hours a day, 365 days a year.

6. What are the physical traits of the guard limited to?
For a person to apply for guard duty at the tomb, he must be between 5' 10" and 6' 2" tall and his waist size cannot exceed 30".

Other requirements of the Guard:
They must commit 2 years of life to guard the tomb, live in a barracks under the tomb, and cannot drink any alcohol on or off duty FOR THE REST OF THEIR LIVES. They cannot swear in public FOR THE REST OF THEIR LIVES and cannot disgrace the uniform {fighting} or the tomb in any way.

After TWO YEARS, the guard is given a wreath pin that is worn on their lapel signifying they served as guard of the tomb. There are only 400 presently worn. The guard must obey these rules for the rest of their lives or give up the wreath pin.

The shoes are specially made with very thick soles to keep the heat and cold from their feet. There are metal heel plates that extend to the top of the shoe in order to make the loud click as they come to a halt. There are no wrinkles, folds or lint on the uniform. Guards dress for duty in front of a full-length mirror.

The first SIX MONTHS of duty a guard cannot talk to anyone, nor watch TV. All off duty time is spent studying the 175 notable people laid to rest in Arlington National Cemetery. A guard must memorize who they are and where they are interred. Among the notables are: President Taft, Joe E. Lewis {the boxer} and Medal of Honor winner Audie Murphy, {the most decorated soldier of WWII} of Hollywood fame. Every guard spends FIVE HOURS A DAY getting his uniforms ready for guard duty.

The Sentinel's Creed:
My dedication to this sacred duty is total and wholehearted. In the responsibility bestowed on me never will I falter. And with dignity and perseverance my standard will remain perfection. Through the years of diligence and praise and the discomfort of the elements, I will walk my tour in humble reverence to the best of my ability. It is he who commands the respect I protect. His bravery that made us so proud. Surrounded by well meaning crowds by day alone in the thoughtful peace of night, this soldier will in honored glory rest under my eternal vigilance.
More Interesting facts about the Tomb of the Unknowns itself:
The marble for the Tomb of the Unknowns was furnished by the Vermont Marble Company of Danby, Vt. The marble is the finest and whitest of American marble, quarried from the Yule Marble Quarry located near Marble, Colorado and is called Yule Marble. The Marble for the Lincoln memorial and other famous buildings was also quarried there.

The Tomb consists of seven pieces of rectangular marble: Four pieces in sub base; weight - 15 tons; One piece in base or plinth; weight - 16 tons; One piece in die; weight - 36 tons; One piece in cap; weight - 12 tons; Carved on the East side (the front of the Tomb, which faces Washington, D.C.) is a composite of three figures, commemorative of the spirit of the Allies of World War I.

In the center of the panel stands Victory (female).

On the right side, a male figure symbolizes Valor.

On the left side stands Peace, with her palm branch to reward the devotion and sacrifice that went with courage to make the cause of righteousness triumphant.

The north and south sides are divided into three panels by Doric pilasters. In each panel is an inverted wreath.

On the west, or rear, panel (facing the Amphitheater) is inscribed:

HERE RESTS IN HONORED GLORY AN AMERICAN SOLDIER KNOWN BUT TO GOD

The first Tomb of the Unknown Soldier was a sub base and a base or plinth. It was slightly smaller than the present base. This was torn away when the present Tomb was started Aug. 27, 1931. The Tomb was completed and the area opened to the public 9:15 a.m. April 9, 1932, without any ceremony.

Cost of the Tomb: $48,000 Sculptor: Thomas Hudson Jones Architect: Lorimer Rich Contractors: Hagerman & Harris, New York City In>
_________________________
"I was so poor growing up, that if I wasn't born a boy, I wouldn't have had anything to play with." Rodney Dangerfield

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#253856 - 10/09/08 09:44 AM Re: WHAT THE HELL? [Re: Stretch73]
Hauser Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 11/12/05
Posts: 2962
Loc: United States
Hi again Mike.

Have you considered writing your representative? I certainly don't believe that you would receive just another form letter if you share your story with him/her.

Many reforms in every social program got it's start from someone that wrote their representative or senator and asked them to consider their position or concern.

Just a thought...........


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#253865 - 10/09/08 10:58 AM Re: WHAT THE HELL? [Re: Hauser]
M3 Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 09/04/07
Posts: 1392
Loc: Central Ohio
GOOD IDEA ALAN!!!

Use your representatives in Washington, especially if one of them is a veteran, to get the wheels-a-turning...


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#253882 - 10/09/08 12:38 PM Re: WHAT THE HELL? [Re: M3]
petercorbett Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 07/27/08
Posts: 2439
Loc: TEXAS
Hi, everyone on this page.
I have said this before and anyone who has been in the military weather or not for one tour or for 20+, we have always been expendable. Probably the biggest obsticle to a Men sexual abuse program is that, we wern't as "macho" soldiers, sailors, airman or Marines supposed to show any reaction to emotions, no sulking, no crying nothing, just suck it up and move on. For us military members, could you just picture crying or weeping to your TI, DI when he got into your face, about either your mother? sister? about what he would like to do to them? Of course it just was to toughen us up. At least that's the way it was back in the 50's. We were not to show any emotions period. Just to react without hesitation to orders, no if's, no and's nor buts. Fortunately I am getting help for CSA by the military here in Germany as a retiree, but I will defer myself if need be to those PTSD combat guys from Afganistan & Iraq. I probably some what of a relief to my therapist that I do get his mind shifted from combat related to a very long ago buried CSA one. As far as finding representatives in Washington, very few have ever been in the military, sadly. Maybe, just maybe there is some sort of a support group simmilar to AA except for CSA/adult rape male victim, in your area. Perhaps you should try and contact the social services office in your area, and maybe a religious group? I hope that this might be of a help. Heal well my friends, maybe some day we will get the serenity that we so richly deserve.
Pete (irishmoose)

_________________________
Working Boys' Home 10-14 yrs old, grades 5-8. 1949-1953
____________________________________________________________
A very humble alumni of the WOR Dahlonega, GA.
May 15-17 2009, Alta, Sep. 2009. Sequoia, 2010.
Hope Springs, 2010.


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#253955 - 10/09/08 03:58 PM Re: WHAT THE HELL? [Re: petercorbett]
LN3(SS) Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 06/20/08
Posts: 486
Loc: MD
Pete,

I take true exception to your post here.

We are not discussing CSA. We are discussing crimes perpetrated upon us by our fellow soldiers/sailors/airmen/marines. In some cases these were our superior NCO's/officers. I would not see any need, if I was in the military mental health system, to defer to a combat PTSD case. While I acknowledge their sacrifice, the military (as an institution), might do well to acknowledge MINE!

The problem I see in your post is the same one that led to my discharge. The inability of the military to address the fact that this crime does occur in the ranks. When it does occur in the ranks, it is swept under the rug and the VICTIM is shown the hatch as quickly as possible!

I submit that the problem is not mine for not being "macho", rather the problem is the military's for inculcating a climate wherein this abuse is allowed to fester. Where senior enlisted and officers turn a blind eye to the very real problems that exist in this area. Reexamine the posts in this light, please.

I encourage anyone that may wish to post in opposition to me to please do so. If anyone wishes to support my stand, I welcome your support.

Brian



Edited by LN3(SS) (10/09/08 05:41 PM)
_________________________
"When we go into battle, I will be the first to set foot on the field, and I will be the last to step off, and I will leave no one behind. Dead, or alive, we will all come home together." LTG Hal Moore, Jr., USA (Ret.)

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#253958 - 10/09/08 04:08 PM Re: WHAT THE HELL? [Re: LN3(SS)]
Barkabus Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 05/09/08
Posts: 809
"Honor Betrayed" by Mic Hunter just arrived in the mail today.

I'm reading it now.

Mike

_________________________
My Story

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#254161 - 10/10/08 01:27 PM Re: WHAT THE HELL? [Re: LN3(SS)]
petercorbett Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 07/27/08
Posts: 2439
Loc: TEXAS
Hi, LN3(SS).
I respect your opinion. I respect your pain, and I respect you.
I hope that you find the help that you deserve. Heal well my friend.
Pete (Irishmoose)

_________________________
Working Boys' Home 10-14 yrs old, grades 5-8. 1949-1953
____________________________________________________________
A very humble alumni of the WOR Dahlonega, GA.
May 15-17 2009, Alta, Sep. 2009. Sequoia, 2010.
Hope Springs, 2010.


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#255446 - 10/15/08 04:29 PM Re: WHAT THE HELL? [Re: petercorbett]
OKIE MIKE Offline
Member

Registered: 02/13/04
Posts: 982
Loc: HULBERT OK
What am I suposed to do when . I have spent over 7 years trying to get the help, From the VA for MST and have not recieved effective treatment. But when I look out side of the VA
I am condimed fo looking for help. They offer help to female rape victoms bot not to males. I Know that I am not the only service male member to have ben raped while serving in the military. This is rediculas

_________________________
MICHAEL

"I HAD NO SHOES THEN I SAW A MAN THAT HAD NO FEET"

"All I can do is be me, whoever that is"

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#296044 - 07/20/09 04:18 AM Re: WHAT THE HELL? [Re: OKIE MIKE]
OKIE MIKE Offline
Member

Registered: 02/13/04
Posts: 982
Loc: HULBERT OK
This is strange I google "Male Military Sexual Trama"
because I am haveing a realy hard time dealing with my own stress. Because of MST and it sends me to my own posting on Male survivors . I need help to deal with this I am not able to do it any more

_________________________
MICHAEL

"I HAD NO SHOES THEN I SAW A MAN THAT HAD NO FEET"

"All I can do is be me, whoever that is"

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#296164 - 07/20/09 10:15 PM Re: WHAT THE HELL? [Re: OKIE MIKE]
LN3(SS) Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 06/20/08
Posts: 486
Loc: MD
Mike,

When you are ready, consider the residential treatment program at Bay Pines. Unfortunately your therapist has to refer you, so you need to get her onboard. PM me if you need any info about getting forms, etc.I also hear that they have opened another in Cincinatti. These are about what the VA has to offer in terms of quality care for men.

I am trying to bolster knowledge of this site among the therapists down here. Not working for some reason.

Brian

_________________________
"When we go into battle, I will be the first to set foot on the field, and I will be the last to step off, and I will leave no one behind. Dead, or alive, we will all come home together." LTG Hal Moore, Jr., USA (Ret.)

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