Last night, Chad discovered a site for pedophiles on my computersí history. (NO I donít clear the history ever.) I was reading a post in ďOff TopicĒ about a safe haven and discussion board for evil people, mainly pedophiles, on the internet, and I clicked on the provided links. I had to end up proving to Chad, by signing on and showing him the post, which also didnít work out well because the links were removed. The evidence was lost. Nonetheless, he never really doubted what I was telling him. He knows me too well. He was using the scene as more to poke fun and joke around, and I am always taken aback when people donít believe me (even jokingly) and I have to prove something.
Iím not a big time computer whiz. I use a computer just about all day, but I keep with the programs I have for my business. Those programs I know inside and out, backward and forward, but I think Iím relatively obtuse when it comes to the internet and all this searching, and chatting, and watching. Male Survivor is the first chat room Iíve ever participated in, other than the support rooms that are available through certain company sites. I like playing games on AOL; Letter Linker is my favorite, and ever since Iíve been logging on to this site, you tube has become habitual. (Itís funny what some people will do in front of a camera. Some are destined to be actors, but missed their calling. Others were destined to become actors, but fortunately, we all missed their calling. LOL) Some of the guys who work for me like to joke around and throw banter my way when it comes to the information superhighway. This is what I am:
1) Iíd much rather pick up a book then read words on a lit computer screen.
2)Iíd much rather look a person in the eye when Iím speaking to them.
3)Iíve noticed many people say things or insult when they normally wouldnít face-to-face with a person. I wonít say anything online in a chat room that I wonít say to you in person, and it should be vice versa.
4)I may be the butt of jokes around my business when it comes to what I donít know, and how many different programs I donít know how to use online, but when it comes to what I know best, nobody around here measures up. Take that to the bank!
5)I am often suspicious with what many people claim online, and/or in a chat room. I donít get the whole world of cyber sex. How can you masturbate to some words on a monitor? I will admit, I have severe trust issues, and I worry that many online users are non-genuine, a trait that only furthers my suspicions.
6) I like real intimate contact with people, whether one-on-one, or in a group. I think you can learn more from someone by listening to their voice, learning of their reactions, when their upset, and when their happy. You canít get that on a monitor, or so the recent past has proven to myself.
7)I donít understand the slang, and I often feel ďleft outĒ because I am not educated in the abbreviations of simple to relatively moderate lengthy words, like Lots Of Laughs.
8)I do like to write, and I can become sensitive in my words, and detailed as to my abuse and past experiences, but I worry about the non-genuine reader who takes my words as a thrill, rather than a woe.
Maybe Iím not cut out for the online society, and thatís just fine with me, but Iím trying my best to fit in. I think it would be relevant to write, that those who post certain topics, should leave out the inappropriate links, and the advertisement of sites which seem to cater to the very people weíve all be hurt by. (I know the links were eventually removed from the particular post.) I also feel suspicious of someone who registered as a member, and immediately posts a topic and SA about such things.
Think about it!
"I was so poor growing up, that if I wasn't born a boy, I wouldn't have had anything to play with." Rodney Dangerfield