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#248652 - 09/08/08 03:17 PM Beautiful Video on Coming Out
M3 Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 09/04/07
Posts: 1392
Loc: Central Ohio
The pains of coming out.

May trigger (two boys kiss, mild violence - father to son).

View Video Here


Since it is specifically gay, I thought this might be better posted here than in the movie section (posted a great video there too).


Hope you like... Michael \:\)


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#248657 - 09/08/08 03:32 PM Re: Beautiful Video on Coming Out [Re: M3]
roadrunner Offline
Administrator Emeritus
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 05/02/05
Posts: 22045
Loc: Carlisle, PA
Michael,

Yes I remember this one. They certainly chose a novel way to come out! And yes, absolutely, the video is beautiful and harrowing at the same time.

Much love,
Larry

_________________________
Nobody living can ever stop me
As I go walking my freedom highway.
Nobody living can make me turn back:
This land was made for you and me.
(Woody Guthrie)

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#248755 - 09/08/08 11:54 PM Re: Beautiful Video on Coming Out [Re: M3]
Joel Rosset Offline


Registered: 08/21/08
Posts: 45
Loc: Canada
Hey Micheal, it's me again

I have been feeling kinda melancholy since watching the vid you posted today. It's taken me all day to be able to respond - I had to let my emotions re-balance first.I'm almost jealous of those two sweet boys who had the courage to just so naturally love each other. I never got that chance. I learned that guys love you by sticking dick down your throat and I now feel a little sad for the queer boy I was growing up to become and who never got the chance to discover love in the right way.

I only had one male lover when I was adult who was tender and respectful and sadly I had no clue how to relate to that. I loved him fiercely but I was never able to trust that when he said he loved me that he meant it. I continually kept trying to push all his buttons so that he would finally snap and beat me and berate me - then I could have been sure of his love for me. In those years, if you weren't hurting me, you didn't love me, it was just that simple. Blessedly, with the years I have grown so much beyond that place that it even seems a little hard for me to recall it with clarity. Thank God for therapy and self help books - I could never have made to here without either!

I never had to come out - but I'll post on that later.

________________________

The wisest souls are the most deeply scarred ones

Joel (sweetboy)

_________________________
Wise souls are deeply scarred

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#248796 - 09/09/08 08:54 AM Re: Beautiful Video on Coming Out [Re: Joel Rosset]
M3 Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 09/04/07
Posts: 1392
Loc: Central Ohio
Joel, you hit the nail on the head.

BY FAR the hardest part of my recovery has been coming to terms with the loss of innocents, discovery and the boy and man I would have been and am trying to be today.

I was lucky, I at least got to have a first kiss. In fourth grade I had a "boyfriend" named Duane. We'd hold hands on the playground and beat up anyone who made fun of us (only needed to happen once). My mom was an aide at the school and never heard any of the teachers talk about us, so it doesn't seem anyone took much offense or concern that we did this. (And this was a very small, very conservative farming community in Ohio.) ON a Friday in April, his family was moving away and at the end of his last day, one of the girls turned to us and said, "You two should kiss goodbye." Duane turned and grabbed me and laid a big old kiss right on my lips. I saw fireworks. It didn't really hit me he was gone until after dinner that night. I was so happy when we were together that his moving away wasn't real to me. But that night I went to bed and cried myself to sleep knowing I'd never see him again.

This is a memory I really cherish because this is the type of childhood I should have had.


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#248813 - 09/09/08 11:07 AM Re: Beautiful Video on Coming Out [Re: M3]
Sans Logos Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 05/31/03
Posts: 5791
Loc: in my own world in pittsburgh,...
michael, this should be posted with a 5 hankie trigger! LOL

i too remember this one going around the block a while ago, but it is always pleasant to revisit.

i am glad you have good memories about your early years. i don't, but i have been working on creating some in my later years for me to look back on with fondness.

doing so puts helps put a chasm between what was and what is.

good stuff,

ron

_________________________
  1. the past
  2. ReClaiming Now
  3. advocacy


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#248815 - 09/09/08 11:21 AM Re: Beautiful Video on Coming Out [Re: Sans Logos]
EGL Offline
Moderator Emeritus
MaleSurvivor
Registered: 06/19/04
Posts: 7821
That was a really beautiful video, Michael, thanks for posting the link, I had never seen it before. There was so much symbolism in it, but I think the caught fish out of water, gasping for air, was especially poignant.

_________________________
Eddie

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#250356 - 09/20/08 12:50 PM Re: Beautiful Video on Coming Out [Re: EGL]
M3 Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 09/04/07
Posts: 1392
Loc: Central Ohio
Agree about the fish. I remember feeling that way at that age.


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#250374 - 09/20/08 03:21 PM Re: Beautiful Video on Coming Out [Re: M3]
KENKEN Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 09/25/07
Posts: 762
Loc: NOTHERN COLORADO
M3

Really awesome video! It brought back tears and a rush of emotion flooded me.. So tender and so hard to relate to today. Now so many years older the word "Trust" plays such a big part in my present relationship. I so want to believe and feel that love beween us, but I was hurt so many times in my life. I just don't want to be hurt anymore. Will I ever be able to trust again?

Ken

_________________________
I AM A GOOD PERSON, I AM A GOOD MAN

From the Movie: Antwone Fisher

***WOR ALUMNI SEQUOIA MARCH 2008***

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#250516 - 09/21/08 11:23 PM Re: Beautiful Video on Coming Out [Re: KENKEN]
M3 Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 09/04/07
Posts: 1392
Loc: Central Ohio
I hope so.

My problem is I don't trust myself (understanding what I'm feeling) or my partner. I'm really trying, but the closer I get, the more scared I'm getting.

<sigh>

Michael


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#250604 - 09/22/08 04:27 PM Re: Beautiful Video on Coming Out [Re: M3]
joelRT Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor


Registered: 09/11/08
Posts: 1357
Loc: Québec, Canada
.



Edited by joelRT (03/15/09 12:43 AM)
Edit Reason: leaving
_________________________
My Story 1
My Story 2
The longest journey we take is to self-discovery

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#250608 - 09/22/08 05:10 PM Re: Beautiful Video on Coming Out [Re: joelRT]
M3 Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 09/04/07
Posts: 1392
Loc: Central Ohio
\:\/


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#250692 - 09/23/08 06:28 AM Re: Beautiful Video on Coming Out [Re: M3]
Joren Offline


Registered: 09/22/08
Posts: 51
Loc: US
A friend of mine showed me this one day a few years ago online. It's amazing how sad this makes me as I realize the kind of person I could have been and what I missed out on. I guess really it's still difficult for me to focus on more than the pain presented in it.


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#250705 - 09/23/08 10:28 AM Re: Beautiful Video on Coming Out [Re: Joren]
M3 Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 09/04/07
Posts: 1392
Loc: Central Ohio
Yes, that is exactly my reaction too. You see what could have been if it weren't for the abuse.


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