Thank you for opening my eyes further. I find all this learning fascinating and helpful.
You are right...my own parents had some N traits, too, but they were not so manipulative as to hide their disappointment in me. So I turned out w/ low self-esteem myself, not a N. I was not "built up" in their eyes when I did everything "right" that they told me to do; rather, I was torn down verbally/physically/emotionally when I did not do things perfectly in order w/ their agendas.
However, it seems to me that in that article/list, it tells how insidiously conniving a N mother can be, so as to hide her abuse of her children and instead make it look more like she is being helpful or educating or what-have-you, so the child does not *feel* as though it is abusive, even though it really is because it takes away his individual will to be his own person with his own opinions and preferences, etc. Maybe that is more according to a true totally NPD/sociopathic(?) mom. I know NPD and sociopathy are cousins.
Think about it; it's almost like a grooming pedophile (makes abuse look ok) vs. one that attacks in an *obviously* wrong way.
I think that might be a crucial difference. If abuse from a narcissistic parent is "sheep in wolf's clothing" enough, the child will not feel he has been abused and therefore may absorb more of those behaviors himself. I was aware enough that some treatment by my N parents was abusive - some was insidious but a lot was obviously cruel - so I knew there was something wrong in treating people that way and I didn't want to treat others the same way.
I agree that so many celebrities are N.
Please keep your knowledge of this subject coming, as I am just starting to understand more about N and how it relates to my H and his own upbringing. E.g. when I cry or am sad, it irritates my H. His own mom cries to get his attention - it is only a manipulative ploy. So now I see, no wonder it irritates him when I seemingly act the same way, though without her ulterior motives. He needs to know that not all women are like his mom. Otherwise he will keep (projecting? is that the right word?) her behavior onto me and assume I am all sorts of bad things that I am not.
It were better for him that a millstone were hanged around his neck, and he cast into the sea, than that he should offend one of these little ones.