Little Miss,
I am so proud of you for handling this as well as you are. Maybe it will be easier to set your boundaries without him around you all the time.
I also wanted to point you toward my post titled "T says H's Narcissism is bigger prob than his CSA". Your H sounds so much like mine, twists and turns everything around to look like YOU are the bad guy, has a temper, etc. Read the link I put in that other post and see if it matches up. There are ways to cope and deal and respond to a person's Narcissism. I am learning all about it now. I encourage you to do it if you think it's one of his traits, because it will help you whether you ever get back together or not. As long as you have dealings with him, it helps to know how to respond to him so he doesn't manipulate you any more.
You have done all the right things, incl. getting his family aware of this. He needs people to tell him "Your Game Is Over."
Good luck and have a calm and peaceful weekend.
_________________________
Brokenhearted
It were better for him that a millstone were hanged around his neck, and he cast into the sea, than that he should offend one of these little ones.
Luke 17:2