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#242827 - 08/06/08 07:41 PM The end of therapy- its been a long 3 years.
GateKPR4 Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 10/28/07
Posts: 955
Loc: North Carolina, USA
Its been a while since I wrote anything. Days have come and gone, my life has changed.
After 3 years of working with my therapist Isabelle the time has come to part ways.
We have worked long and hard on my issues. Time spent gradually removing the layers
of abuse. Letting go of ways of the past that were wrong dysfunctional. The lies
slowly giving way to the truth. One day the light had shown through and my journey shifted into high gear. All I knew, all I thought was truth all I believed had come to an end. I cried for my loss, and the life that might have been. I cried for the pain and suffering I caused myself, my friends, my family. For the first time I was seeing life for what it is now and not for what it was.
We had our last session and talked of all the progress we have made over the past years
And it was then we knew it was time to part. I can’t say it was easy because it was very trying at times. I had to rethink my beliefs to see the truths that were hidden in places that I dare not go. When the truth was found it was a relief and I could never go back to the way I was.

I am grateful for having the caring experienced person as a therapist that I had. She helped
Me in ways I am only beginning to realize. The taste of freedom is a wonderful experience.
My self-imposed jail is all but a faded memory now. I look back at the cell door open and rusted falling apart with each passing day. Soon there will be nothing left but a pile of rust with nothing left to hold it together. The cell built from pain, misery, fear, shame, and guilt now stands alone, empty. I turn my back to it and say today I am free. There is nothing you have that I need. Rust away, rust away, be no more for you have held me far too long and there is nothing more you have to offer. Your protection was a lie and for this I abandon you. I see through new eyes today, I have the key to your lock and I have used it well I dare open the door to see the truth. Once again I look back and now there is a pile of rust being scattered
In the wind the cell is gone the nightmare is over.
This is the only way I could describe my experience and my journey. There are many people
Who have helped me along over the past 5 years I have done my best to thank them all.
Some have passed away, others have gone away but I will always remember their willingness
to take time and help me to learn a new way of life. The doors are open the world is mine to pick and choose what I would like to do not what I was forced to do. This is freedom and today
this is what I choose.
Love & light
Rick

_________________________
I'm a normal person dealing with abnormal experiences.
The greatest discoveries we will find within ourselves.
Ricky
__m_τΏτ_m__
|| || || || || || |

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#242834 - 08/06/08 08:20 PM Re: The end of therapy- its been a long 3 years. [Re: GateKPR4]
Trucker51 Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 05/20/08
Posts: 2826
Loc: Denver, CO
That's great to hear Ricky, wish you all of the best the world has to offer from here on out, a world unrestrained by past experiences and difficulties. Thanks for helping make me feel at home here when I first discovered this site.

Mark

_________________________
"We stay here, we die here. We've got to keep moving". Trucker Mark



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#242868 - 08/06/08 10:19 PM Re: The end of therapy- its been a long 3 years. [Re: Trucker51]
DanM Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 11/09/07
Posts: 540
Loc: So. California
Ricky,

It is nice to see/hear someone so full of good feelings and hope. I know it was a long and sometimes painful journey for you, but you have arrived at your final destination. I wish you a good and full life. I am sure there are many things you want to do and experience with your new found freedom. You are an inspiration for many of us.

Good luck...

Dan


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#243022 - 08/07/08 04:59 PM Re: The end of therapy- its been a long 3 years. [Re: DanM]
LW1527 Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 05/14/08
Posts: 408
Loc: Salt Lake City Ut
Ricky - awesome!


Lance


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#243049 - 08/07/08 07:18 PM Re: The end of therapy- its been a long 3 years. [Re: LW1527]
John Oarc Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/10/06
Posts: 633
Loc: Louisiana
Congrats Rick,


John Oarc

_________________________
Whatever It Takes, God


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#243066 - 08/07/08 08:52 PM Re: The end of therapy- its been a long 3 years. [Re: John Oarc]
pufferfish Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/26/08
Posts: 6875
Loc: USA
Rick,

This is absolutely wonderful. Congratulations.

May I ask a favor? Take a few minutes and write us a post about the things that contributed to your progress. Sometimes I feel like I am standing still. How did you pull it off?

Puffer


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#243109 - 08/08/08 12:51 AM Re: The end of therapy- its been a long 3 years. [Re: pufferfish]
1islandboy Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 06/23/08
Posts: 862
Loc: washington
G8keypr4,

Very inspirational, What really hit home was the how you view life part. I think we all want a new set of eyes.

Freedom,happiness,love,light,and truth...from within, are what I get from reading your post.

Congrats on, (the end of therapy)For sure ditto on the long part.

Thanks, for the fresh air,

island

_________________________
Rise above the storm and you will find the sunshine ~ M.F. Fernandez

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#243256 - 08/08/08 04:24 PM Re: The end of therapy- its been a long 3 years. [Re: 1islandboy]
GateKPR4 Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 10/28/07
Posts: 955
Loc: North Carolina, USA
Puffer ,
I have been in some kind of recovery for almost 6 years now.
The things that most contributed to my progress
Stopped drinking alcohol & doing drugs. This gave me a clearer understanding of what my real issues were. Second was finding the right psychiatrist that worked with me instead of just trying to medicate me to oblivion. Its not so much the diagnosis its really about getting the meds I need to sustain a common ground that I can live with. Third was getting a good therapist that has experience with csa.
I had to face my fears and rethink the way I was thinking. This takes time but it pays off big time later on. Being open and honest even if it hurts. Its OK to show emotion.
Last is the belief that recovery is possible. I never lost site of that goal I wanted to be recovered not in recovery. It is hard work opening up to others and MS gave me chance to open up and learn from people here who may have a different story but understand the pain most of us feel.
Recovering is like learning to walk it takes time and work.
I used all the tools that I had at my disposal, talk, writing, the internet, and people who understand. I found talking my posts from here to my T was a big help. There are topics here that I just did not find in my sessions so I think it helped me have more effective sessions & make more progress.
I hope this helps :-)

_________________________
I'm a normal person dealing with abnormal experiences.
The greatest discoveries we will find within ourselves.
Ricky
__m_τΏτ_m__
|| || || || || || |

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#243258 - 08/08/08 04:38 PM Re: The end of therapy- its been a long 3 years. [Re: GateKPR4]
pufferfish Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/26/08
Posts: 6875
Loc: USA
Thank you.

Your comments are so helpful. They will help many of us.

My best to you and for your future.

Come back and say hello.

Puffer


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#243384 - 08/09/08 06:37 AM Re: The end of therapy- its been a long 3 years. [Re: pufferfish]
GateKPR4 Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 10/28/07
Posts: 955
Loc: North Carolina, USA
I will keep in touch all of have helped and I could never thank you all enough.

_________________________
I'm a normal person dealing with abnormal experiences.
The greatest discoveries we will find within ourselves.
Ricky
__m_τΏτ_m__
|| || || || || || |

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#243386 - 08/09/08 06:39 AM Re: The end of therapy- its been a long 3 years. [Re: GateKPR4]
DanM Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 11/09/07
Posts: 540
Loc: So. California
Ricky,

It was nice getting an update. Here is to good things in your future!

Dan


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