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#241791 - 08/01/08 03:27 PM Re: Are You a Survivor? [Re: hogan_dawg]
JustScott Offline
Greeter Emeritus
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 01/27/08
Posts: 2582
Exactly. I've had a few that I felt very uncomfortable with at first and thought they were just full of it, just to find out later they they really were being honest. So it's best to just take it at face value until you're given a reason not too.

Great advice Hogan.


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#241793 - 08/01/08 03:37 PM Re: Are You a Survivor? [Re: hogan_dawg]
LW1527 Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 05/14/08
Posts: 408
Loc: Salt Lake City Ut
Thanks. I told you I was irrational today. Thanks for putting up with my fears.


Lance


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#241794 - 08/01/08 03:48 PM Re: Are You a Survivor? [Re: LW1527]
BJK Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 08/02/07
Posts: 1526
I'd say they are rational fears. Thanks for voicing them.

Bryan

_________________________
Revenge is nothing more than another way of perpetuating abuse.

What the world needs now
Is some new words of wisdom
Like la la la la la la la la la.
-David Lowery

Having a friend who will keep a secret for you is worthless compared to a friend who won't keep a secret from you.

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#241796 - 08/01/08 03:50 PM Re: Are You a Survivor? [Re: LW1527]
roadrunner Offline
Administrator Emeritus
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 05/02/05
Posts: 22045
Loc: Carlisle, PA
Guys,

Yes, it is troubling when a teen comes to us and is still in a situation of active abuse. What he needs is our absolute support and understanding. But it will make him feel profoundly uncomfortable if he feels he is the cause of alarm and panic.

Please bear that in mind when you are posting. It's okay to talk about your own feelings about the immediacy of abuse, but please do not speculate on the survivor himself. He is a brother survivor in particular need of feeling safe here.

Larry, aka roadrunner
ModTeam Coordinator

_________________________
Nobody living can ever stop me
As I go walking my freedom highway.
Nobody living can make me turn back:
This land was made for you and me.
(Woody Guthrie)

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#241797 - 08/01/08 04:00 PM Re: Are You a Survivor? [Re: roadrunner]
LW1527 Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 05/14/08
Posts: 408
Loc: Salt Lake City Ut
Sorry I made a mess here. Perhaps if there are concerns it should be in the form of a PM. I will take responsibility for my part. The last thing I want is for a teen to get scared off. It's hard enough for adults. We all know what it was like being a teen and being in his situation crying for help.

Lance


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#241800 - 08/01/08 04:08 PM Re: Are You a Survivor? [Re: LW1527]
roadrunner Offline
Administrator Emeritus
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 05/02/05
Posts: 22045
Loc: Carlisle, PA
Lance,

You're okay, bro. It hits hard when abuse is right there in our face again, and it just takes a bit of focusing to handle it.

Much love,
Larry

_________________________
Nobody living can ever stop me
As I go walking my freedom highway.
Nobody living can make me turn back:
This land was made for you and me.
(Woody Guthrie)

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#241803 - 08/01/08 04:23 PM Re: Are You a Survivor? [Re: LW1527]
BJK Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 08/02/07
Posts: 1526
I don't think anyone has made a mess here. These are all valid concerns that need to be addressed including the situation this teenager is in.

The question is, how can we address all of these concerns while not tromping on anyone's individual support?

I stand by what I said...we need to learn to protect ourselves before we try to help others. Every single story on this website hurts to read. They are all painful. My method of coping is to compartmentalize the issue of abuse into one large problem that we can address one person at a time.

Bryan

_________________________
Revenge is nothing more than another way of perpetuating abuse.

What the world needs now
Is some new words of wisdom
Like la la la la la la la la la.
-David Lowery

Having a friend who will keep a secret for you is worthless compared to a friend who won't keep a secret from you.

Top
#241805 - 08/01/08 04:37 PM Re: Are You a Survivor? [Re: BJK]
Marcus Mystery Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 04/02/08
Posts: 195
It freaked me out bad that everyone was talking about me and I felt like I did something wrong. It's hard to talk about it, and yeah its still happening to me. But Larry told me I should talk about it and ask for the help I need so I want to do that and write a survivor story. Thanks for believing me and wanting to help. i just have to work on not getting so scared here.

Marc


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#241806 - 08/01/08 04:40 PM Re: Are You a Survivor? [Re: BJK]
roadrunner Offline
Administrator Emeritus
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 05/02/05
Posts: 22045
Loc: Carlisle, PA
Marc,

That's a pretty brave post you just made. Well done. We will talk more about things and I'm sure the guys will want to support you and help you as you deal with the situation you are in. I know you have heard it before, but always remember that the abuse is not your fault.

Much love,
Larry

_________________________
Nobody living can ever stop me
As I go walking my freedom highway.
Nobody living can make me turn back:
This land was made for you and me.
(Woody Guthrie)

Top
#241808 - 08/01/08 04:48 PM Re: Are You a Survivor? [Re: Marcus Mystery]
Barkabus Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 05/09/08
Posts: 809
Oh Marc,

Thank you for saying something. This is very strong and brave of you. I am sorry that I started a thread about our conversation. I needed to talk about how I felt though. I felt horrible for you and your situation. I didn't intend for this thread to go the direction it did. I am very sorry that this has freaked you out and made you feel like you have done something bad.

First of all though, you did nothing wrong. Marc. I hope you can understand that. Yeah, the feelings will get in the way and want to make you think you are bad and did something to deserve this. That's not true though. Not in the least.

Man, I am so glad you spoke up though. It may have taken a while but, you have shown that you have the courage to come forward and talk about it. Way to go! We're here for you bro.

Mike

_________________________
My Story

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