Newest Members
JHNebraska, mike42069, JACKL, Personman, SiegmundNYC
12490 Registered Users
Today's Birthdays
Alpha (49), AYounglove10 (23), joanne (27), justme62 (52), pontifixmax (44), royjay (46), Steve S. (48)
Who's Online
5 registered (woodenshoes, Obi, 3 invisible), 24 Guests and 9 Spiders online.
Key: Admin, Global Mod, Mod
Forum Stats
12490 Members
74 Forums
64156 Topics
447661 Posts

Max Online: 418 @ 07/02/12 07:29 AM
Twitter
Page 1 of 2 1 2 >
Topic Options
#240989 - 07/29/08 12:45 PM Money issues interfers with therapist relationship
LandOfShadow Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 12/11/07
Posts: 684
Loc: Minneapolis, Minnesota USA
I'm wondering if anyone has ideas how to deal with this. Perhaps a check on my thinking about this.

My therapist has raised her rates from $100 to $120. My insurance has revived downward the amount they pay leaving me to pay a significant increase. I don't feel I can afford it, so I am probably changing therapists (to someone "in-network" with full coverage) or stopping therapy.

I've spent 2 1/2 years building this relationship, I'm still in phase 1 of 3 and I'm facing starting over. I've been taken advantage of financially by my family and it feels like the same thing. Get him hooked, then raise your rates when he can't leave. It's making me so angry at her. She refuses to lower her rates. The insurance company refuses (so far) to raise their reimbursement. The trust I had is quickly evaporating. I feel so exploited financially and vulnerable. I have a lot of insecurities and fears around money.

I'm spending a quarter of my income on healthcare. I could continue my therapy if I'd drop my health insurance, but I'd be vulnerable to financial disaster due to a serious illness or going without care.

_________________________
Et par le pouvoir d’un mot Je recommence ma vie, Je suis né pour te connaître, Pour te nommer
Liberté

And by the power of a single word I can begin my life again, I was born to know you, to name you
Freedom

Paul Eluard

Top
#240990 - 07/29/08 12:51 PM Re: Money issues interfers with therapist relationship [Re: LandOfShadow]
hogan_dawg Offline
Guest

Registered: 03/26/08
Posts: 492
I very seldom comment in favour of dropping a therapist.

In my country, health care of this kind is paid for 100%, so I truly empathize with you - I could never afford the therapy I receive.

That said, I have always found therapists and psychiatrists to be pretty caring individuals who work for often much less than they are worth - because they give a damn.

If this one wants to raise her rates, despite your situation, do you feel that it informs or tells you where her priorities lay?

You Americans need a decent health care plan that isn't tied to private insurers and employment.

_________________________
I can say unequivocally that the lie of "To truly heal you must first forgive" has derailed more victims than the abusers themselves.
Andrew Vachs, 2003

Top
#240995 - 07/29/08 12:57 PM Re: Money issues interfers with therapist relationship [Re: LandOfShadow]
Stretch73 Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 06/27/08
Posts: 336
Loc: Sea Isle City, NJ
There is a Federal program known as "Medical Dental Expenses Tax Credit." If you are a tax-paying American citizen, you can apply for the program. Essentially, the government will deduct medical expenses from the federal tax that you owe. As far as I know, the program is only available to people for no longer than eight months. In that eight months, I believe the government expects you to locate other means for paying your medical expenses. You can go here to read up on it; http://www.govbenefits.gov
I know that you can also go to your local Labor Office and pick up the information.

Hope this helped!

Rich

_________________________
"I was so poor growing up, that if I wasn't born a boy, I wouldn't have had anything to play with." Rodney Dangerfield

Top
#240997 - 07/29/08 01:00 PM Re: Money issues interfers with therapist relationship [Re: hogan_dawg]
blueshift Offline
Guest

Registered: 01/21/08
Posts: 1242
Loc: infinity
Yeah, I think if that's where her priorities are, maybe it's time to move on. You do have to pretty much start all over again building trust and so on, but otherwise, I think it will just eat at you and hinder your therapy anyway to know that you are paying so much and that it's all about money with her.

_________________________
My Story
My Art

Top
#241002 - 07/29/08 01:11 PM Re: Money issues interfers with therapist relationship [Re: hogan_dawg]
LandOfShadow Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 12/11/07
Posts: 684
Loc: Minneapolis, Minnesota USA
Yes, the travesty of US healthcare is obvious to everyone except those profitting from it, but until I finally decide to leave, I am stuck here.

Yes, perhaps you are right on priorities. She recently did a major kitchen remodel, bought land and is building a second home. She says her rates are still below average. I haven't tried to compare rates and experience and that seems a complex exercise.

_________________________
Et par le pouvoir d’un mot Je recommence ma vie, Je suis né pour te connaître, Pour te nommer
Liberté

And by the power of a single word I can begin my life again, I was born to know you, to name you
Freedom

Paul Eluard

Top
#241005 - 07/29/08 01:16 PM Re: Money issues interfers with therapist relation [Re: LandOfShadow]
hogan_dawg Offline
Guest

Registered: 03/26/08
Posts: 492
In Canada, the going rate for an MD-Psychiatrist with:

B.Sc (3 years minimum), MD (3-4 years) + 4 years specialty training in psychiatry was $110 per hour.

It's so hard to shift gears though and leave a therapist. I feel for your plight.

Maybe it's going to boil down to brinkmanship - like, maybe she thinks you'll swallow the increase without batting an eye. Stretch's government idea is a good one though...but temporary. Sigh.





Edited by hogan_dawg (07/29/08 01:17 PM)
_________________________
I can say unequivocally that the lie of "To truly heal you must first forgive" has derailed more victims than the abusers themselves.
Andrew Vachs, 2003

Top
#241108 - 07/29/08 06:45 PM Re: Money issues interfers with therapist relation [Re: hogan_dawg]
deck Offline
Member

Registered: 08/19/06
Posts: 109
Loc: Indiana
Well she may be raising her rates for any number of reasons. The truth is it doesn't matter why.

I would suggest that you not drop your health insurance. Ask your therapist if she would be able to recommend someone in the area. You could ask about organizations that have a "floating scale". How much you pay is based on your income.

Many churches sponser counselors or facilities covering part of the expense. Although I am not particlarly religous, my current conselor is affiliated with a church. His fee is based on a floating scale.


Top
#241111 - 07/29/08 06:59 PM Re: Money issues interfers with therapist relation [Re: deck]
OKIE MIKE Offline
Member

Registered: 02/13/04
Posts: 982
Loc: HULBERT OK
In my opinion all that a shrink does is direct you in how help your self. There is better advise on this list than you can get from someone who has studied some book . The people here have experence in real life, and truely do know what you are feeling

_________________________
MICHAEL

"I HAD NO SHOES THEN I SAW A MAN THAT HAD NO FEET"

"All I can do is be me, whoever that is"

Top
#241120 - 07/29/08 07:31 PM Re: Money issues interfers with therapist relationship [Re: LandOfShadow]
pufferfish Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/26/08
Posts: 6875
Loc: USA
This doesn't help

It's just a rant

I've spent something like $170,000 of my own money on counseling because of what other people did to me when I was a helpless child.

Sorry for the rant

Puffer


Top
#241127 - 07/29/08 07:46 PM Re: Money issues interfers with therapist relationship [Re: pufferfish]
LandOfShadow Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 12/11/07
Posts: 684
Loc: Minneapolis, Minnesota USA
Rants are ok. You are a courageous and strong man Puffer, and I admire you for it.

_________________________
Et par le pouvoir d’un mot Je recommence ma vie, Je suis né pour te connaître, Pour te nommer
Liberté

And by the power of a single word I can begin my life again, I was born to know you, to name you
Freedom

Paul Eluard

Top
#241129 - 07/29/08 07:51 PM Re: Money issues interfers with therapist relationship [Re: pufferfish]
Trucker51 Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 05/20/08
Posts: 2826
Loc: Denver, CO
It is happening to everyone. My blood pressure medication just went up by $20 in copay, and my acid-reflux drug's copay went up by $15. Another drug I take the copay just doubled, from $250 to $500, per month. My copay for mental health services was $25, now it is 30%. All of this started the first of July, when the company raised our health care costs and lowered our benefit levels. You want to know something else odd? I can buy all of these drugs cheaper in Mexico without a pre>
_________________________
"We stay here, we die here. We've got to keep moving". Trucker Mark



Top
#241335 - 07/30/08 10:36 AM Re: Money issues interfers with therapist relationship [Re: Trucker51]
Ken Singer, LCSW Offline
Moderator Emeritus
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 08/24/00
Posts: 5780
Loc: Lambertville, NJ USA
It is a tragedy that this country has such a poor health care policy. So many countries around the world do it much better than we do.

One thing you may want to do is look carefully at the health care positions of the senators, representatives and presidential candidates running this November and write to them to express your feelings about this.

It may be more effective than ranting.


Top
#241381 - 07/30/08 03:34 PM Re: Money issues interfers with therapist relationship [Re: Ken Singer, LCSW]
pufferfish Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/26/08
Posts: 6875
Loc: USA
Is it necessary?

Must children be taken advantage of willy nilly?

We protect our children with child seats in cars, seat belts, with product labelling, protestations against lead, etc., etc.

But we can't protect children against sexual abuse? Sexual abuse is on the increase. Porn is probably contributing to it.

Our legislators and lawyers don't seem to acknowledge a problem. Perps get off with lenient sentences after expensive trials where the victim gets attacked by the adversarial legal system.

The victims go into a denial phase and when they remember "it" the statute of limitations has passed. Then they cannot seek legal redress for their grievances.

Even the medical profession doesn't generally seem to be aware.

Our insurance system is lame and even accusatory when it comes to claims for abuse-related problems. These are labelled "mental health issues". Depression. Anxiety. PTSD. Dissociation. The victim seems to be at fault.

A lot of guys here have job-related problems related to their abuse as children. There is a real wall of discrimination.

What can I do but rant?

Puffer (puffing again)



Edited by pufferfish (07/30/08 03:57 PM)

Top
#241383 - 07/30/08 03:46 PM Re: Money issues interfers with therapist relationship [Re: pufferfish]
JustScott Offline
Greeter Emeritus
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 01/27/08
Posts: 2590
I think the trouble is people are willing to talk about car seats and car safety and when they see someone with a kid not in a car seat they get all angry and say something.

With sexual abuse.... people get all wierd, clam up, and hope they didn't see what they think they saw....

People talk loudly about car seat safety, but if they talk about sexual abuse at all, it's hushed and quiet and relegated to private places so other peoples "sensibilities" won't be offended.


Top
#241385 - 07/30/08 03:57 PM Re: Money issues interfers with therapist relationship [Re: pufferfish]
BJK Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 08/02/07
Posts: 1526
I'm in this category now...have to suspend treatment until next year when my insurance policy's deductible renews. I'll be ready next year, as I can set aside a pre-tax health care account...but it has to be done at the beginning of the year (and then it's not tax deductible).

I suppose I really could afford it if I wanted to push other goals I have finally set for myself back, but my therapist and I both agreed that now is a good time to take a break.

Now let's just hope I don't break a leg or something.

Bryan

_________________________
Revenge is nothing more than another way of perpetuating abuse.

What the world needs now
Is some new words of wisdom
Like la la la la la la la la la.
-David Lowery

Having a friend who will keep a secret for you is worthless compared to a friend who won't keep a secret from you.

Top
#241387 - 07/30/08 04:02 PM Re: Money issues interfers with therapist relationship [Re: JustScott]
BJK Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 08/02/07
Posts: 1526
Originally Posted By: JustScott
I think the trouble is people are willing to talk about car seats and car safety and when they see someone with a kid not in a car seat they get all angry and say something.

With sexual abuse.... people get all wierd, clam up, and hope they didn't see what they think they saw....

People talk loudly about car seat safety, but if they talk about sexual abuse at all, it's hushed and quiet and relegated to private places so other peoples "sensibilities" won't be offended.


Between 1 in 4 and 1 in 6 kids is a victim of sexual abuse.

I'm guessing fewer children than that actually get into car accidents.

I understand why we have laws about car seats, I just could never understand why people get so emotional about it.

Bryan

_________________________
Revenge is nothing more than another way of perpetuating abuse.

What the world needs now
Is some new words of wisdom
Like la la la la la la la la la.
-David Lowery

Having a friend who will keep a secret for you is worthless compared to a friend who won't keep a secret from you.

Top
#241402 - 07/30/08 06:05 PM Re: Money issues interfers with therapist relationship [Re: BJK]
LandOfShadow Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 12/11/07
Posts: 684
Loc: Minneapolis, Minnesota USA
What strikes me as odd is that Blue Cross Blue Shield lowered the amount they pay, as if, psychotherapy services in this market are now available at a lower price. I doubt that. Or perhaps, with all the veterans and others seeking mental health treatment, they decided to lower their costs. They cover some large fraction of the population here, my T said 90%, and thus have a kind of monopoly on reimbursement rates to health care providers. So they could kind of force providers to accept less.

We've spent 2 sessions talking about money, and have a third scheduled. 3 phone calls, forms filed, another few hours. My T is filling out forms for me, for a hour (free). LOL. What a screwed up system.

_________________________
Et par le pouvoir d’un mot Je recommence ma vie, Je suis né pour te connaître, Pour te nommer
Liberté

And by the power of a single word I can begin my life again, I was born to know you, to name you
Freedom

Paul Eluard

Top
#241571 - 07/31/08 03:48 PM Re: Money issues interfers with therapist relationship [Re: LandOfShadow]
Trucker51 Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 05/20/08
Posts: 2826
Loc: Denver, CO
Wait until the insurance companies will only pay for 10 or 15 hours of mental health care per year, and only with designated providers who offer the insurer a discount rate. Oh wait, that is already happening to a friend of mine, who has already exhausted his mental health benefit for this year back in May. And starting this month now his insurer only wants to pay for so many hours at insurance-designated providers with a $40 co-pay, and for anyone else outside the insurance-approved network his insurer only is willing to pay for a percentage of the cost of a specified number of hours of treatment after a yearly deductible is met. I already know that two of the five mental health providers approved by my health-care insurer in my suburb of 50,000 people are general practitioners with limited or no experience in CSA issues, and I don't know about the other three providers yet. Is my experience at 2 out of 5 providers enough to make an educated guess about the rest?

Hey, at least we still have a choice in our system of health care. Isn't that what everyone was so afraid of loosing back when Bill's wife was pushing socialized medicine so hard? Now the choice is to pay some for less, or pay more for a little more, or pay a whole lot more. Is that what the all of the naysayers meant by the loss of choice in health care???

Mark

_________________________
"We stay here, we die here. We've got to keep moving". Trucker Mark



Top
Page 1 of 2 1 2 >


Moderator:  ModTeam, TJ jeff 

I agree that my access and use of the MaleSurvivor discussion forums and chat room is subject to the terms of this Agreement. AND the sole discretion of MaleSurvivor.
I agree that my use of MaleSurvivor resources are AT-WILL, and that my posting privileges may be terminated at any time, and for any reason by MaleSurvivor.