I have had the experience of falling apart and having the peices of me fight myself. I was recently diagnosed with mid-range dissasociative Identity dissorder. I don't like being many peices of me. and the Flashbacks are Still HELL!!, but I keep pressing forward and praying for help. And talking to my T What else can I do???

i don't think we have much choice. we either fight it - or succumb and ... well ... that's not a pretty picture.

listen to your T. keep yourself resourced. and breathe.

}shrug{

them's the only things I know of that even partly sometimes once-in-a-while work

M

Mark,

This is a really great thread, I mean, okay...it is not so great feeling the feelings that we are talking about, but, your last post is great...because it seems like recovery is a lot about choices.

I don't think it ever occured to me, when my daughter was three or four years old, when she would fall or get hurt, that it was anything other than normal and natural for her to cry or scream and come looking to me for support.

You've mentioned you have a son...I wondered if your experience was the same? They are hurt, want validation, need to cry...then, they go back out to play.

If the only choices available are to fight, or to succumb...which does those scenarios fall under?


:-)


CD

depends on your point of view. To me - seeking help is fighting. Giving up is succumbing.

but, that's just me.

M

ps - and yes, the world really IS just black and white.

So...the paradox, or, irony is...that going for help includes allowing the feelings in...inviting them in, as it were. In an environment, hopefully, that is safe. So...fighting is succumbing.

crazy system...


CD

no - going for help does not mean allowing the feelings in.
your T might tell you eventually that will happen
but i don't believe the one involves the other

but "crazy system"?

you're catching on

So...we can make the conscious choice to not feel?


CD

Absolutely.

Then, I understand why it must feel crazy...okay, thank you. Kind of like trying not to laugh when someone tickles you, or, trying not to bleed when some one cuts you.

That would be hard.

CD

you're getting close. and i appreciate and honor the effort made to try to see the world thru my distorted lenses.

just don't look too long. i don't care to feel guilty for bringing on someone else's dementia

m