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#23682 - 10/17/03 02:38 AM Been awhile
bowman Offline
Member

Registered: 04/19/03
Posts: 72
Hello all,
I haven't been here for a while, partly been moping and feeling sorry for myself, partly busy trying to build more relationships out in the world.

Fortunately, welbutrin seems to have stabilized the depression, which is a huge relief, and helps me to be more balanced, even when things get rough.

Mostly I have a lot of emotional pain about being abused by my father when I was pretty young. Sometimes I can't stand the thoughts in my head, and I still feel like I am the lowlife, even though I 'know' that's not true.

Also, I am still afraid enough to leave a light on at night, and sleep in my clothes. But I am sleeping at least six hours a night, which is seriously a blessing.

I really appreciate the support that is here.

Take care,
Ken


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#23683 - 10/17/03 08:19 AM Re: Been awhile
Mike Church Offline
Moderator Emeritus
MaleSurvivor
Registered: 01/23/03
Posts: 3439
Loc: Toronto, Canada
Ken:
Glad to see you back. I am taking Wellbutrin also mixed with Effexor. I guess I am a pharmacy! \:D


I too slept with the light on. But then I got a bid stuffed animal and that seem to take care of sleeping. He was my demon slayer. Now I enjoy the warmth of my wife next to me.

If only I could stop having to go to the bathroom 3 times a night. Wh well the joys of growing old.

_________________________
Mikey

IT REALLY IS OK TO STUMBLE. NONE OF US ARE PERFECT.

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#23684 - 10/18/03 01:11 AM Re: Been awhile
The Dean Offline
Moderator Emeritus
MaleSurvivor
Registered: 07/15/02
Posts: 2080
Loc: Milwaukee, WI
Hi Ken,

I'm saddened that you still have the problems around sleep.

I found Wellbutrin to be the miracle drug for me. I take that and Klonipin daily. But, we are all so different that others have said the Wellbutrin did not work for them at all.

I do not keep a light on in my room at night, but I have situated my room so that lights from outside make my room rather bright once me eyes adjust at night.

Our ways of coping are also really different. After I was raped I would go to my tent and crawl in my sleeping bag with all my clothes on. So, now, I sleep with nothing on.That feels better for me. When I have to us pajama's I just am not comfortable--it makes me remember things I don't want to think about.

Much peace to you Ken. It will keep getting better, even if all too slowly.

Bob

_________________________
If we do not live what we believe, then we will begin to believe what we live.

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#23685 - 10/18/03 02:51 AM Re: Been awhile
bowman Offline
Member

Registered: 04/19/03
Posts: 72
Thanks for the replies and the encouragement.

Its kind of f**ked how the abuse messes with this basic thing--sleeping. But its cool that we each come up with different creative strategies to cope.

Take care of yourselves,

Ken


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#23686 - 10/19/03 06:45 AM Re: Been awhile
Leosha Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 06/18/03
Posts: 3614
Loc: Right here
Hi Ken!

I just wanted to say that it's great to see you back here, and I'm glad that the medicine is working better for you. Please continue to take good care of yourself.

leosha

_________________________
Avatar photo in memory of my younger brother Makar.

"Human salvation lies in the hands of the creatively maladjusted."~~~Martin Luther King Jr., 1963

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