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#234268 - 06/28/08 09:01 AM dealing with it, or is it dealing with you?
Sans Logos Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 05/31/03
Posts: 5791
Loc: in my own world in pittsburgh,...
i recently got involved in a nearby SIA group. i went to my first meeting on monday last. it was awesome to participate in a forum of live persons with real body language.

the recovery steps of sia are similar to those of other 12 step programs with some differences; the differences in my mind soften the judgmental edge.

at any rate, their literature is all xeroxed material, but it is quite powerful inspiring. the primary document akin to aa's 'big book' is what they call 'the slogans'. there are 12 of them, and slogan number one is :

'this too shall pass' [like a kidney stone..... no, i added that myself \:o ]

anyway, i would love to type the whole chapter in here for you to read, but since that ain't gonna happen, i thought i would just share some key points:

1. we no longer need to protect our abuser' by rationalizing 'mine wasn't that bad', 'he only did it once', 'i was too sexy and invited it'.

2. we have been on emotional cruise control all our lives and are now beginning to have feelings. after the need to express anger is satisfied we will be able to let it go.

3. we will replace self-destructive and isolating behaviors with healthy attitudes of self-respect and self-love.

4. if we keep coming back and work on the recovery we will eventually not have to relive it again and again.

the basic premise is that 'we are responsible for our own cure'. the problems associated with sexual abuse will not go away on their own. 'either we deal with it, or it will deal with us' [arronb, spoonful of medicine please!]

but the tenor of the whole document is very hopeful:

'as we build on our successes, we will see that our goal is rich and attainable'.

now that is the best news i've heard all day and it's only 9am.

have a good one,

ron

_________________________
  1. the past
  2. ReClaiming Now
  3. advocacy


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#234324 - 06/28/08 03:55 PM Re: dealing with it, or is it dealing with you? [Re: Sans Logos]
blueshift Offline
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Registered: 01/21/08
Posts: 1242
Loc: infinity
This is interesting. Do the initials stand for Survivors of Incest Anonymous?

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#234332 - 06/28/08 05:35 PM Re: dealing with it, or is it dealing with you? [Re: blueshift]
hogan_dawg Offline
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Registered: 03/26/08
Posts: 492
Can I revise #2?

2. we have been on emotional cruise control all our lives and are now beginning to have feelings. after the need to express anger is satisfied we will be able to let it go.

Change to:

2. ...after the need to express anger is satisfied and my perpetrator has been carved up and placed in a cold freezer, we will be able to let it go.

Ha ha. Sorry - victim humour.

_________________________
I can say unequivocally that the lie of "To truly heal you must first forgive" has derailed more victims than the abusers themselves.
Andrew Vachs, 2003

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#234455 - 06/29/08 01:36 PM Re: dealing with it, or is it dealing with you? [Re: blueshift]
Sans Logos Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 05/31/03
Posts: 5791
Loc: in my own world in pittsburgh,...
yes blueshift

_________________________
  1. the past
  2. ReClaiming Now
  3. advocacy


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#234456 - 06/29/08 01:38 PM Re: dealing with it, or is it dealing with you? [Re: hogan_dawg]
Sans Logos Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 05/31/03
Posts: 5791
Loc: in my own world in pittsburgh,...
no prob hogan...just wondering about the purpose of preserving their pieces.....

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  2. ReClaiming Now
  3. advocacy


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