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#231374 - 06/16/08 07:33 PM Unwanted questions in life
FormerTexan Offline
Site Administrator
MaleSurvivor
Registered: 09/12/04
Posts: 11045
Loc: Denver, CO
"Why aren't you married yet?"

_________________________
List of things ain't nobody got time for:

1. That


If I could meet myself as a boy...

Top
#231375 - 06/16/08 07:34 PM Re: Unwanted questions in life [Re: FormerTexan]
Hauser Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 11/12/05
Posts: 2962
Loc: United States
"You don't get out much, do you?"


Top
#231376 - 06/16/08 07:34 PM Re: Unwanted questions in life [Re: FormerTexan]
Sans Logos Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 05/31/03
Posts: 5791
Loc: in my own world in pittsburgh,...
how come you're not married anymore?

_________________________
  1. the past
  2. ReClaiming Now
  3. advocacy


Top
#231378 - 06/16/08 07:37 PM Re: Unwanted questions in life [Re: Sans Logos]
Nyjah Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 07/14/07
Posts: 610
Are you really anorexic or are you just joking?


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#231379 - 06/16/08 07:43 PM Re: Unwanted questions in life [Re: Nyjah]
ineffable Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/07/08
Posts: 1371
Loc: state of holeecrapdood
"How's that working out for you?"

_________________________
:: "Anyone who can handle a needle convincingly can make us see a thread which is not there" ::


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#231381 - 06/16/08 08:00 PM Re: Unwanted questions in life [Re: ineffable]
Hauser Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 11/12/05
Posts: 2962
Loc: United States
This one dates back a little further for me:

"Why don't you have a girlfriend?"


Top
#231396 - 06/16/08 09:05 PM Re: Unwanted questions in life [Re: Hauser]
Barkabus Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 05/09/08
Posts: 809
This one's not a question but just as bad...

We just got to get you hooked up with someone.

_________________________
My Story

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#231397 - 06/16/08 09:08 PM Re: Unwanted questions in life [Re: Barkabus]
MarkK Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 04/02/07
Posts: 2502
Loc: Denver, CO
"You wouldn't want to hurt Jesus with your life would you?"

and close behind in all time favorites...

"Are you trying to break my heart?"


Top
#231478 - 06/17/08 10:46 AM Re: Unwanted questions in life [Re: MarkK]
johnnymike Offline
Guest

Registered: 03/08/08
Posts: 51
Loc: Central Ohio
Aren't you over that yet?


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#231482 - 06/17/08 11:50 AM Re: Unwanted questions in life [Re: johnnymike]
pufferfish Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/26/08
Posts: 6843
Loc: USA
To me the song: "He touched me"

Always gave me the creeps. A favorite of Elvis, though.

Puffer


Top
#231483 - 06/17/08 12:03 PM Re: Unwanted questions in life [Re: pufferfish]
Thomas J Offline
Guest

Registered: 11/21/07
Posts: 83
Loc: Oklahoma
are u trying 2 break our family up?
can u really b that stupid?


Top
#231485 - 06/17/08 12:06 PM Re: Unwanted questions in life [Re: pufferfish]
pufferfish Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/26/08
Posts: 6843
Loc: USA
From my father:

Can't you grow up and be a man?


Puffer


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#231486 - 06/17/08 12:21 PM Re: Unwanted questions in life [Re: pufferfish]
ineffable Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/07/08
Posts: 1371
Loc: state of holeecrapdood
"What would Ghandi do?"

dedicated to a tie-dyed optimist

C

_________________________
:: "Anyone who can handle a needle convincingly can make us see a thread which is not there" ::


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#231487 - 06/17/08 12:31 PM Re: Unwanted questions in life [Re: ineffable]
pufferfish Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/26/08
Posts: 6843
Loc: USA
Again from my father:

"What's wrong with you, hot?"

and

"Are you trying to look like a fop?"


definition of fop: A man who is preoccupied with and often vain about his clothes and manners; a dandy.

definition of hot: Slang. Sexually excited or exciting

Puffer


Top
#231620 - 06/18/08 09:27 AM Re: Unwanted questions in life [Re: pufferfish]
JasonSmalls Offline
Guest

Registered: 12/01/07
Posts: 142
Loc: NJ
This is my fav...... "how come ur gay?" lol

i always respond back "how come ur str8?" lol


Top
#231649 - 06/18/08 12:59 PM Re: Unwanted questions in life [Re: JasonSmalls]
roadrunner Offline
Administrator Emeritus
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 05/02/05
Posts: 22045
Loc: Carlisle, PA
"How do you know you won't go back?" (to drugs - after 32+ years)

_________________________
Nobody living can ever stop me
As I go walking my freedom highway.
Nobody living can make me turn back:
This land was made for you and me.
(Woody Guthrie)

Top
#231651 - 06/18/08 01:00 PM Re: Unwanted questions in life [Re: JasonSmalls]
roadrunner Offline
Administrator Emeritus
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 05/02/05
Posts: 22045
Loc: Carlisle, PA
Joey,

Originally Posted By: JasonSmalls
This is my fav...... "how come ur gay?" lol

i always respond back "how come ur str8?" lol

So you would love two T-shirt designs I remember seeing in the Village once:

"How dare you assume I'm heterosexual!"

"No, I'm not gay, but my BOYFRIEND is!"

Much love,
Larry

_________________________
Nobody living can ever stop me
As I go walking my freedom highway.
Nobody living can make me turn back:
This land was made for you and me.
(Woody Guthrie)

Top
#231652 - 06/18/08 01:02 PM Re: Unwanted questions in life [Re: roadrunner]
roadrunner Offline
Administrator Emeritus
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 05/02/05
Posts: 22045
Loc: Carlisle, PA
"You were with him four years? You liked it?"

_________________________
Nobody living can ever stop me
As I go walking my freedom highway.
Nobody living can make me turn back:
This land was made for you and me.
(Woody Guthrie)

Top
#231671 - 06/18/08 02:02 PM Re: Unwanted questions in life [Re: roadrunner]
Sans Logos Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 05/31/03
Posts: 5791
Loc: in my own world in pittsburgh,...
ummmm, sorry larry, but......could you answer that one please????

don't kill me!

_________________________
  1. the past
  2. ReClaiming Now
  3. advocacy


Top
#231674 - 06/18/08 02:24 PM Re: Unwanted questions in life [Re: Sans Logos]
EGL Offline
Moderator Emeritus
MaleSurvivor
Registered: 06/19/04
Posts: 7821
"Why didn't you tell anyone?"

or, what's even worse than the questions after you disclose - is the silence and the questions you know they have.

_________________________
Eddie

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#231677 - 06/18/08 02:41 PM Re: Unwanted questions in life [Re: Sans Logos]
roadrunner Offline
Administrator Emeritus
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 05/02/05
Posts: 22045
Loc: Carlisle, PA
Ron,

Originally Posted By: Sans Logos
ummmm, sorry larry, but......could you answer that one please????

don't kill me!

No problem. I don't want to hijack the thread, but yes, I did like it in a certain sense. I hated and feared the abuse and the abuser, but by then I thought I wasn't good for anything else and this was all I deserved. I would dissociate and "drift away", trying not to think about the crying boy in the room below me, but the building orgasms would always kind of "harpoon" me and bring me back. In a way I felt like Moby Dick, or better, a staked vampire.

So as you can see, the idea of "liking it" was pretty complicated for me. And what I was missing back then, as an abused boy, was the fact that if a kid gets erections and orgasms and ejaculates, those are just physical reactions to sexual stimulation. A boy will react like that even if he fears and dislikes what is being done to him. All his reactions prove is that his sexual plumbing is working as it's supposed to work - no more.

Much love,
Larry

_________________________
Nobody living can ever stop me
As I go walking my freedom highway.
Nobody living can make me turn back:
This land was made for you and me.
(Woody Guthrie)

Top
#231678 - 06/18/08 02:42 PM Re: Unwanted questions in life [Re: roadrunner]
roadrunner Offline
Administrator Emeritus
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 05/02/05
Posts: 22045
Loc: Carlisle, PA
And my favorite: "So you're in therapy to keep from becoming a pedophile?"

_________________________
Nobody living can ever stop me
As I go walking my freedom highway.
Nobody living can make me turn back:
This land was made for you and me.
(Woody Guthrie)

Top
#231683 - 06/18/08 03:29 PM Re: Unwanted questions in life [Re: roadrunner]
duncanUK Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 12/24/06
Posts: 632
i always get asked "how come you dont have a girlfriend?" "are you gay or something?"

_________________________
you dont see me. i am not really here. Its my fault.. all of it. I am to blame and no one else.

Top
#231686 - 06/18/08 03:42 PM Re: Unwanted questions in life [Re: duncanUK]
SEVEN ARROWS Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 08/12/07
Posts: 1298
''So your schizophrenic'' when people find out about alters.


Top
#231702 - 06/18/08 04:55 PM Re: Unwanted questions in life [Re: SEVEN ARROWS]
pufferfish Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/26/08
Posts: 6843
Loc: USA
On my first job out of college, I visited 3 friends I respected. Upon leaving, I hesitated at the door and listened. One of them said:

"What's wrong with him?"

Now all of us on this MS site know the answer.

Puffer



Edited by pufferfish (06/18/08 04:56 PM)

Top
#231705 - 06/18/08 05:44 PM Re: Unwanted questions in life [Re: pufferfish]
Trucker51 Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 05/20/08
Posts: 2826
Loc: Denver, CO
At a big summer party with all of my social crowd there, after I had been unable to respond to the advances of three eligible white-collar women that I already knew, a guy I knew asked in front of the whole group, "What's the matter, you don't like women or something? You probably gay, huh?" (Think NYC accent) It wasn't the first time, but it was a really bad place for it. You know how many of those people that I have seen since then? On the other hand, it was the crisis that first gave me the courage to try the back stairs that led to my first therapist's office in 1986. (I was too scared to try the front door or the elevator, which only led to his office). At least with the back stairs, there was the security of multiple possible destinations and if I ran into anyone, they wouldn't know where I was going for sure.

Hey, 120 posts. A work in progress!

Mark

_________________________
"We stay here, we die here. We've got to keep moving". Trucker Mark



Top
#231791 - 06/19/08 01:41 AM Re: Unwanted questions in life [Re: Trucker51]
frost Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 03/15/07
Posts: 1377
Loc: Eh?
"Has anyone seen _____ (_________) about?"

or

"You around?"

seem to be pretty fucking unwanted questions

_________________________
Boom!

Top
#231794 - 06/19/08 02:19 AM Re: Unwanted questions in life [Re: frost]
testingWaters Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 07/19/06
Posts: 508
this is one that i didn't mind but it makes me laugh.

"did you prod or did you get prodded?"

(from an ex-girlfriend i recently disclosed to - she had an honest curiosity and it was a cute way to put it, for me, though i can imagine it might have horrified someone else. guess it all depends on the relationship you have with the persn)



Edited by testingWaters (06/19/08 02:38 AM)

Top
#231833 - 06/19/08 10:26 AM Re: Unwanted questions in life [Re: testingWaters]
Jarrad Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 10/27/06
Posts: 1071
Loc: arizona
how are you in love with him?

why are you here?


Top
#231838 - 06/19/08 10:54 AM Re: Unwanted questions in life [Re: testingWaters]
Sans Logos Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 05/31/03
Posts: 5791
Loc: in my own world in pittsburgh,...
i like the way fiona apple puts it:

from the song get him back 'get him back'

'one man he disappoint me;
he give me the GOUGE and he take my glee'

_________________________
  1. the past
  2. ReClaiming Now
  3. advocacy


Top
#231842 - 06/19/08 11:05 AM Re: Unwanted questions in life [Re: Sans Logos]
roadrunner Offline
Administrator Emeritus
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 05/02/05
Posts: 22045
Loc: Carlisle, PA
Another one I just adore sometimes, though I understand it's a way of expressing genuine concern: "Are you okay?"

Much love,
Larry

_________________________
Nobody living can ever stop me
As I go walking my freedom highway.
Nobody living can make me turn back:
This land was made for you and me.
(Woody Guthrie)

Top
#231902 - 06/19/08 02:06 PM Re: Unwanted questions in life [Re: roadrunner]
dgoods Offline
Guest

Registered: 10/15/07
Posts: 622
Loc: Richmond area
"Why are you so nervous?"

_________________________
Give sorrow words: the grief that does not speak
Whispers the o'er-fraught heart and bids it break.

-William Shakespeare, Macbeth, Act IV, Sc. III

Top
#232016 - 06/19/08 10:11 PM Re: Unwanted questions in life [Re: dgoods]
roadrunner Offline
Administrator Emeritus
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 05/02/05
Posts: 22045
Loc: Carlisle, PA
"Why aren't you smiling in these pictures?" Man, is this thread ever bringing back some memories!

_________________________
Nobody living can ever stop me
As I go walking my freedom highway.
Nobody living can make me turn back:
This land was made for you and me.
(Woody Guthrie)

Top
#232076 - 06/20/08 03:00 AM Re: Unwanted questions in life [Re: roadrunner]
Trucker51 Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 05/20/08
Posts: 2826
Loc: Denver, CO
Staying busy lately? Or my dad's favorite, "Why are you so stupid"?

I like your last one Larry. That is beautiful, my man, and so true.

TM

_________________________
"We stay here, we die here. We've got to keep moving". Trucker Mark



Top
#232177 - 06/20/08 12:12 PM Re: Unwanted questions in life [Re: Trucker51]
TJ jeff Offline

Moderator
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 08/07/04
Posts: 3365
Loc: Northern Wisconsin
"Why can't you be more like your brother?"

_________________________
Who will cry for the little boy? - I will... - Antwone Fisher

Abuse happens in silence/isolation - Recovery happens only when that silence/isolation is broken...

TJ's History

Top
#232179 - 06/20/08 12:23 PM Re: Unwanted questions in life [Re: TJ jeff]
Sans Logos Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 05/31/03
Posts: 5791
Loc: in my own world in pittsburgh,...
good one ..... but they would not have wanted to hear the answer to that one

_________________________
  1. the past
  2. ReClaiming Now
  3. advocacy


Top
#232571 - 06/22/08 01:56 PM Re: Unwanted questions in life [Re: Sans Logos]
JustJeff Offline
Guest

Registered: 03/19/08
Posts: 262
"Have you ever been sexually abused", i hate when people ask me that question, cause i don't really tell anyone.

_________________________
.

Top
#233385 - 06/25/08 02:04 AM Re: Unwanted questions in life [Re: JustJeff]
pufferfish Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/26/08
Posts: 6843
Loc: USA
Again from my father:

Why don't you stand up straight?

Throw your shoulders back?

Be a man?

Puffer


Top
#233391 - 06/25/08 02:32 AM Re: Unwanted questions in life [Re: pufferfish]
rehpotsirhcs Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 10/10/07
Posts: 204
"Are your parents divorced?"
"Where does your real father live?"
"Do you visit your real Dad often?"
"How tall are you? Seriously?"
"Do you have a girlfriend, young man?"
"Are you stupid?"
"Why do you skip class so often?"
"Why are you depressed?"
"Why are you being so quiet?"
"Am I a bad mom?"
"Are you asleep?"


Top
#233506 - 06/25/08 03:09 PM Re: Unwanted questions in life [Re: rehpotsirhcs]
king tut Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/13/08
Posts: 2465
Loc: UK
"Have you got a problem with people?"
"I don't mean to be rude, but have you got a problem with contact with people??"

_________________________
"...until lambs become lions"

I love you, little lewis, and i will never leave you. We are the same. You brighten my day, and i will make sure that i brighten yours. Hugs and kisses.


Top
#233507 - 06/25/08 03:10 PM Re: Unwanted questions in life [Re: king tut]
king tut Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/13/08
Posts: 2465
Loc: UK
"Have you ever had sex?"

_________________________
"...until lambs become lions"

I love you, little lewis, and i will never leave you. We are the same. You brighten my day, and i will make sure that i brighten yours. Hugs and kisses.


Top
#233640 - 06/26/08 01:19 AM Re: Unwanted questions in life [Re: king tut]
pufferfish Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/26/08
Posts: 6843
Loc: USA
From my mom:

Why can't you be a real boy?

Why can't you go out and play ball with the other boys?

Why can't you make friends?

You sit up here in your bedroom all the time.

Why can't you be somebody?

Puffer


Top
#233647 - 06/26/08 01:55 AM Re: Unwanted questions in life [Re: pufferfish]
blueshift Offline
Guest

Registered: 01/21/08
Posts: 1242
Loc: infinity
"What are you thinking about?" I had a girlfriend that had the funniest way of asking me that right when I was just completely spaced out dissociating and my head was about as full of thought as a ping pong ball.

One time I just said "Tits." lol

_________________________
My Story
My Art

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#234124 - 06/27/08 05:20 PM Re: Unwanted questions in life [Re: pufferfish]
thecoopstah Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 07/19/04
Posts: 589
Loc: massachusetts
"why does everything bother you so much let it go"


Coop

_________________________
" You never know how strong you are until being strong is the only choice you have "

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