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#223989 - 05/13/08 02:45 AM pretend boy
SEVEN ARROWS Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 08/12/07
Posts: 1298
you look at the pretend boy in his childs skin
Two legs and two arms just like yours
walking to school with the look of the child on his face
with the look of your child

But inside visions of hands touching him
feel the pain from the night
hard to walk but must be a pretend boy.

Did you look at your child sleeping last night
did you feel proud and love for the child
did you see him smile as he dreampt of cartoons and toy soldiers

pretend boy does not dream
pretend boy does not smile in his bed
pretend boys bed is full of pain and fear

pretend boy goes home at the end of school
walking slow to delay the homecoming
no smiles and tea for him no homework then cartoons
no innocent play fun with friends in the street

pretend boy faces the dark alone
pretend boy numbs his skin and thoughts
pretend boy dies some more each night

pretend boy goes to school with a pretend boys shell
hiding the bruises and shame and guilt
pretend boy hides and is scared

pretend boy cry's inside and wonders why does daddy hate him so much
pretend boy wants to be a real boy with smiles and a hug from daddy.


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#224043 - 05/13/08 11:01 AM Re: pretend boy [Re: SEVEN ARROWS]
KENKEN Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 09/25/07
Posts: 762
Loc: NOTHERN COLORADO
Awesome Poem

As soon as stop the tears, I will respond.

I have a hope that someday my pretend boy, Inner Child, will be able to smile as I/he dreams of cartoons and toy soldiers.

That part of my life was taken away from me, and oh How I Want It Back.

Ken

_________________________
I AM A GOOD PERSON, I AM A GOOD MAN

From the Movie: Antwone Fisher

***WOR ALUMNI SEQUOIA MARCH 2008***

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#226021 - 05/23/08 11:57 AM Re: pretend boy [Re: KENKEN]
roadrunner Offline
Administrator Emeritus
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 05/02/05
Posts: 22045
Loc: Carlisle, PA
Ben,

This is so powerful and so honest. All I can say is thanks, and I remember. Geez, do I remember.

Much love,
Larry

_________________________
Nobody living can ever stop me
As I go walking my freedom highway.
Nobody living can make me turn back:
This land was made for you and me.
(Woody Guthrie)

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#226042 - 05/23/08 12:35 PM Re: pretend boy [Re: roadrunner]
Freedom49 Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 12/30/07
Posts: 2723
Loc: Washington State
We learn "let's pretend" early don't we. We learn it well. Finally I can stop pretending, mostly. Here anyway I can be myself, even if it is fooling, flippant, angry, in pain, happy, silly, or even, dare I say, grown up.


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#226109 - 05/23/08 05:26 PM Re: pretend boy [Re: SEVEN ARROWS]
reality2k4 Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 07/06/04
Posts: 6838
Loc: Stuck between water, air, and ...
Ben, this is powerful, and it shows how boys mask their lives early on to protect their abusers.
A life of pretend is no life for a child, no way,

ste

_________________________
Whoever stole the Sun, put it back and we'll drop all the charges!

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#226127 - 05/23/08 06:29 PM Re: pretend boy [Re: reality2k4]
SEVEN ARROWS Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 08/12/07
Posts: 1298
I use poems as a way to say what happened to me and how i felt then as a child and how i feel now.
I find it so hard and sometimes impossible to just type the words of the past and put them on display for everyone to see.

thankyou for your comments.

Ben


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#229444 - 06/07/08 06:08 AM Re: pretend boy [Re: SEVEN ARROWS]
roadrunner Offline
Administrator Emeritus
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 05/02/05
Posts: 22045
Loc: Carlisle, PA
Ben,

I can imagine this would be a difficult experience for you. But your poems are very good and so honest and hard-hitting. I hope they help you as much as they help the rest of us.

Much love,
Larry

_________________________
Nobody living can ever stop me
As I go walking my freedom highway.
Nobody living can make me turn back:
This land was made for you and me.
(Woody Guthrie)

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#461309 - 02/22/14 11:56 PM Re: pretend boy [Re: SEVEN ARROWS]
victor-victim Offline


Registered: 09/27/03
Posts: 3007
Loc: O Kanada
this is heartbreaking poetry.

my heart is broken.

i know this pretend boy.
we walked slow together.

pretend has become a way of life.
honesty and transparency is my dream, my goal.
freedom from fraud is my full time occupation.
_________________________
Victor|Victim

War
Love
Poetry

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#461333 - 02/23/14 10:40 AM Re: pretend boy [Re: SEVEN ARROWS]
traveler Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/07/06
Posts: 3304
Loc: back in the USA
me too
_________________________
We are often troubled, but not crushed;
sometimes in doubt, but never in despair;
there are many enemies, but we are never without a friend;
and though badly hurt at times, we are not destroyed.
- Paul, II Cor 4:8-9

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#461339 - 02/23/14 12:00 PM Re: pretend boy [Re: traveler]
sentry Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor


Registered: 08/11/12
Posts: 58
Loc: Canada
Yup. So true. I could relate so strong to the character in the movie A.I. Your not alone.

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