Newest Members
DougieB, sethpeterson, R Ellis, SailingAway, Kitty6
12320 Registered Users
Today's Birthdays
iwishicared (41), Scott Oliver (53), TutDaVinci (32)
Who's Online
7 registered (aniceguy, petercorbett, 4 invisible), 15 Guests and 4 Spiders online.
Key: Admin, Global Mod, Mod
Forum Stats
12320 Members
74 Forums
63371 Topics
443131 Posts

Max Online: 418 @ 07/02/12 07:29 AM
Twitter
Page 1 of 2 1 2 >
Topic Options
#22791 - 10/15/03 05:48 AM Great apologies
Leosha Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 06/18/03
Posts: 3614
Loc: Right here
I just wished so much to apologize to all people here. I feel so much as a failure to myself, but I worry that by being one of 'you', someone who does belong here, that to fail is to let everyone else here down also.

I did bad thing, I tried to give up of everything, and end up in hospital again, with tubes in nose, throat, and other places, tied down on the bed. Never would want that again, would not want that even to bad person. And I do not even know why I do it, completely, it was just as I had had enough and could not take it. I feel bad that I do it, I scared and worried some good people who I am lucky to have be friends.

I just want to put it here, for people to know that I am making promise to friends and family that I will make it through this. I can lie at myself, but not others, and I can not break promise to people I care of. I am so sorry.

leosha

_________________________
Avatar photo in memory of my younger brother Makar.

"Human salvation lies in the hands of the creatively maladjusted."~~~Martin Luther King Jr., 1963

Top
#22792 - 10/15/03 06:05 AM Re: Great apologies
Lloydy Offline
Administrator Emeritus
MaleSurvivor
Registered: 04/17/02
Posts: 7071
Loc: England Shropshire
Leosha
I think we understand each others pain, and how some days it just gets too much.

You have no need to apologise to us, spend your time telling yourself good things instead - and believing them.

It's good to see you back though.

Dave

_________________________
Go confidently in the direction of your dreams! Live the life you've imagined. As you simplify your life, the laws of the universe will be simpler.
Henry David Thoreau

Top
#22793 - 10/15/03 06:19 AM Re: Great apologies
Mike Church Offline
Moderator Emeritus
MaleSurvivor
Registered: 01/23/03
Posts: 3439
Loc: Toronto, Canada
Leosha do not apologize. The news that you are going to make it is enough for me. Hang in there you do belong.

_________________________
Mikey

IT REALLY IS OK TO STUMBLE. NONE OF US ARE PERFECT.

Top
#22794 - 10/15/03 09:31 AM Re: Great apologies
crisispoint Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 09/24/03
Posts: 2154
Loc: Massachusetts
Hi, Lee,

It's okay. There is no need to apologize. I'm glad you're here and you're still okay.

That you're still willing to stay here says much about your strength. You're stronger than you realize. And you're needed here. You give me hope.

Be well, and I'm here if you need anything.

Peace and love,

Scot

_________________________
There are reasons I'm taking medication. They're called "other people." - Me, displaying my anti-social tendancies

fromacuriousmind.blogspot.com
malehurtandsurvive.blogspot.com

Top
#22795 - 10/15/03 09:33 AM Re: Great apologies
outis Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/27/03
Posts: 2260
Loc: Maryland USA
Leosha,

Despite it all, you are here. You have survived. You are wiser. You are working to make things better.

Like the guys said, there is no need to apologize. We all have hard times in this hard work. Coming here now to tell us of your promise is another example of how bravely you work to recover.

Thanks,

Joe

_________________________
"Telemachos, your guest is no discredit to you. I wasted no time in stringing the bow, and I did not miss the mark. My strength is yet unbroken…"—The Odyssey, translated by W.H.D. Rouse

Top
#22796 - 10/15/03 10:07 AM Re: Great apologies
Freedom Offline
Member

Registered: 09/21/02
Posts: 164
Loc: US
Leosha,

Just glad you are back here, but most of all that you are still around!

Take care.

_________________________
Life is moving on. AM I?

Top
#22797 - 10/15/03 11:38 AM Re: Great apologies
Andrew Offline
Moderator Emeritus
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 07/25/03
Posts: 1192
Leosha, think of all your marvellous successes. Focus on the positives and the incredible future that lies ahead. I am very glad that you are ok.
Peace to you. Andrew

_________________________
there is no courage without anxiety

Top
#22798 - 10/15/03 01:47 PM Re: Great apologies
IrishKipley Offline
Member

Registered: 09/17/03
Posts: 45
Loc: Eastern US
Leosha

i'm glad that you are ok and that you feel as if you are going to make it. i know you can, you are a strong, brave survivor. hang in there, my friend. there is a light at the end of the tunnell.

Kip


Top
#22799 - 10/15/03 01:52 PM Re: Great apologies
FlyWM Offline
Member

Registered: 09/14/03
Posts: 322
Loc: Michigan
No need to apologize Leo, what you did we have all felt like attempting at one time or another, I am just so happy that you are okay. Missed having you around, but glad you got the help you needed buddy. You are a very strong person, stronger than you know, just try to believe that, and you will be alright.

Peace,
Scott

_________________________
Impossible is just a big word thrown around by small men who find it easier to live in the world they've been given than to explore the power they have to change it. Impossible in not a declaration, it's a dare.

--Adidas

Top
#22800 - 10/15/03 08:56 PM Re: Great apologies
Bill_1965 Offline
Chat Mod Emeritus
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 06/29/03
Posts: 1983
Loc: Flint, Michigan
Leosha,

Welcome back. Glad to hear that you are still here. So you've had a set back, that doesn't mean that you need to feel sorry. You are not the first person to make that mistake and unfortunately you will not be the last.

Our roads to recovery have rough spots along the way. These rough spots will slow us down, stop our progression, or have us slip backwards. This doesn't mean the journey is over, it just means that we need to remember to keep going forward.

I'm glad your still here,
Bill

_________________________
Pain is Temporary; Quitting lasts Forever. - Lance Armstrong

Top
#22801 - 10/16/03 02:03 AM Re: Great apologies
gryffindor Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/08/03
Posts: 131
Loc: St. Charles, Illinois
Leosha, I would hug you if I could and if I knew it wouldn't offend you. You're not a failure and you don't need to apologize to anyone, including and perhaps especially yourself. You've had a set back, but you will be on your feet again and skating. Please take care and keep us posted.

Mary

_________________________
"Where there's a will, there's a way." American Folk Saying

"Had I not fallen, I could not have arisen; had I not sat in darkness, I would not have recognized the light." Midrash Tehillim Ch. 22

Top
#22802 - 10/16/03 04:45 AM Re: Great apologies
pedalboy Offline
Junior Member

Registered: 10/10/03
Posts: 12
Loc: kamloops, BC, Canada
Leosha,

I know exactly how you feel. You feel your letting everyone down, but the truth is you're not. People worry about you. I've been in and out of the hospital a few times myself and I've felt guilty, shameful and embarrased. The main thing is your still here and your still fighting the fight. You never give up. I want to thank you for sharing your self with us. It is nice to know that there are other people who share the same feelings whether they are happy or sad. I believe the ups and downs of life are one of the constants which I try to fix. All we can do is be aware of ourselve and find what triggers us to behave in different ways. I wish you the best as you are in my thoughts and prayers this evening. Sincerely, Pedalboy


Top
#22803 - 10/17/03 02:16 AM Re: Great apologies
bowman Offline
Member

Registered: 04/19/03
Posts: 72
Hey Leosha,
I'm glad you pulled through. I'm glad you were able to reach out to the men on this board. Take care.
Ken


Top
#22804 - 10/18/03 01:22 AM Re: Great apologies
The Dean Offline
Moderator Emeritus
MaleSurvivor
Registered: 07/15/02
Posts: 2080
Loc: Milwaukee, WI
Hi Leosha,

It is so good to read your post here and to know that you are well again. Like someone just said, you are continuing the fight. That takes great courage. Thanks for that.

You know that you have many people that truly love you and will be faithful friends to you. That can be a lot of help on the days when it seems like there is no hope. It means a lot to me to know that you--and all the guys who post here--are my firends, and very good ones too. That fact does keep me going some days. Live life as fully as you can Leosha.

Peace be with you.

Bob

_________________________
If we do not live what we believe, then we will begin to believe what we live.

Top
#22805 - 10/19/03 07:03 AM Re: Great apologies
Leosha Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 06/18/03
Posts: 3614
Loc: Right here
Thank you all who replied. It has been over a week since I make that bad mistake, to try to die, and I feel strong and safe. I have no opportunity to be alone, there is always someone with me, even as I sleep right now. But last night, I had panic and wished to hurt myself, and was able to not do it. Few days before that, I also was wanting to harm myself while upset and in panic, but only scratched my arms with my fingernails, nothing worse of that. So I know that I am making some better choices, and keeping safer. I know that it will not ever be easy, but I am winning on this. Thank you all.

leosha

_________________________
Avatar photo in memory of my younger brother Makar.

"Human salvation lies in the hands of the creatively maladjusted."~~~Martin Luther King Jr., 1963

Top
#22806 - 10/19/03 05:09 PM Re: Great apologies
Mike Church Offline
Moderator Emeritus
MaleSurvivor
Registered: 01/23/03
Posts: 3439
Loc: Toronto, Canada
Leosha the important thing to remember is that we are here all the time and always so you are never ever really truly alone.

_________________________
Mikey

IT REALLY IS OK TO STUMBLE. NONE OF US ARE PERFECT.

Top
Page 1 of 2 1 2 >


Moderator:  ModTeam, TJ jeff 

I agree that my access and use of the MaleSurvivor discussion forums and chat room is subject to the terms of this Agreement. AND the sole discretion of MaleSurvivor.
I agree that my use of MaleSurvivor resources are AT-WILL, and that my posting privileges may be terminated at any time, and for any reason by MaleSurvivor.