Newest Members
JohnWC, KKumar, J44, Anura, reynel5
12420 Registered Users
Today's Birthdays
beginning (34), Gary H. (41), jewelmom (63), kdg2310 (55), Li Yuki (2014), monarchnaps (36), Neverquit (30), Nord (58), SoSad (45)
Who's Online
1 registered (petercorbett), 37 Guests and 6 Spiders online.
Key: Admin, Global Mod, Mod
Forum Stats
12420 Members
74 Forums
63782 Topics
445409 Posts

Max Online: 418 @ 07/02/12 07:29 AM
Twitter
Page 1 of 2 1 2 >
Topic Options
#227457 - 05/28/08 09:57 PM Some good news?
Trish4850 Offline
BoD Liaison Emeritus
MaleSurvivor<

Registered: 10/15/05
Posts: 3280
Loc: New Jersey
I just played a voice mail message from my b/f's T. They were in session tonight and she told him she wanted to fill me in a little on where they are. Since she felt more comfortable doing that while my b/f was in the room, she called at the end of the meeting. I could kick myself! My phone is always near me, but this one day, I forgot and left it in the car *Grrrrrrrrr* so I didn't know to there was something important for me until my b/f called a few minutes ago on my home phone.

Anyway, I mentioned in another post that we talked pretty in depth about feelings this weekend and that may have prompted tonight's discussion with the T. She told me that yes, he is having a hard time accessing his feelings as they apply to him but no, they are not non-existent *duh* Apparently, he even agreed with her a little bit. He told me over the weekend that one thing he wants from therapy is to learn how to make a connection to another person. I thought even acknowledging that he wanted this was huge since in the past he's always said he was meant to be alone and was perfectly content with that. Taking it one step further and talking to his T about it makes me very happy; he's such a tough nut to crack, for good reason, I know, but this dime store hammer I've got is getting worn to the nub trying to chip away at the Berlin Wall.

I've also been invited back for a check-in meeting; no date at the moment, but I'll call her back tomorrow and see when she thinks would be a good time and then check with my b/f to make sure he agrees. I don't want to mess up any agenda he may have.

OK, that's my positive post for the evening; I'll sleep well tonight.

ROCK ON.......Trish

_________________________
If you fall down 10 times, Stand up 11.

Top
#227534 - 05/29/08 05:18 AM Re: Some good news? [Re: Trish4850]
dark empathy Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 11/26/07
Posts: 2016
Loc: durham, north england
Trish, I'm really glad this happened and both you and he recognize this and feel good about it.

it reminds me of something a friend of mine said yesterday. As well as being a friend, she's also a professional working counceler, while there are certain places we don't go and things we don't do, (which we leave for my T), I do find it easy to discuss feelings and things with her, ----- and have been phoning her on a semi-regular basis sinse I started my recovery.

Yesterday, she said that everytime I spoke to her, I changed slightly, and comparing where I am now to where I was at the start of all this she's very surprised. the odd thing is I don't see it like that. It takes an absolutely massive hammer blow (like the thing with **** the other day), to actually make me believe I've got anywhere at all.

the point of this is that to me it sounds not only is your bf doing something different with his feelings, but he's also recognizing that and wanting to include you.

of course i could be totally wrong about this, I'm just looking at myself here and thinking things out, but if there is some kind of similarity, perhaps this is even better news.

As I said, sorry if i'm utterly going in the wrong direction here, ---- either way it sounds like good news to me.


Top
#227536 - 05/29/08 05:53 AM Re: Some good news? [Re: Trish4850]
GateKPR4 Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 10/28/07
Posts: 955
Loc: North Carolina, USA
Quote:
he's always said he was meant to be alone and was perfectly content with that.

I can relate so much to this statement right now. I have been single for about 2 years now and I sat I'm content with that but truth is I enjoy being in a relationship.
I'm content alone for now but I hope to find that special someone someday who will accept me for who I am not what I can offer them or is needy.
I'm happy to hear the good news and hope this will be the start of something beautiful for you two. You might want to get a rock hammer, they are not big but do a good job on cracking rocks \:\) rock on...pun intended lol

_________________________
I'm a normal person dealing with abnormal experiences.
The greatest discoveries we will find within ourselves.
Ricky
__m_τΏτ_m__
|| || || || || || |

Top
#227544 - 05/29/08 07:57 AM Re: Some good news? [Re: GateKPR4]
Marissa Offline


Registered: 05/06/08
Posts: 67
Always great to hear about forward progress! I hope it continues for you both.

Marissa


Top
#227561 - 05/29/08 10:02 AM Re: Some good news? [Re: Marissa]
Trish4850 Offline
BoD Liaison Emeritus
MaleSurvivor<

Registered: 10/15/05
Posts: 3280
Loc: New Jersey
Thanks folks. I know this is a good thing, it maybe small in the eyes of some, but I know better.

A rock hammer huh? I'll have to look into that

ROCK ON.........Trish

_________________________
If you fall down 10 times, Stand up 11.

Top
#227568 - 05/29/08 10:46 AM Re: Some good news? [Re: Trish4850]
EGL Offline
Moderator Emeritus
MaleSurvivor
Registered: 06/19/04
Posts: 7821
Trish, I agree that this is some VERY good news. It sounds like he's realizing that there's more to life than living it contained in his own safe world. And that involves reaching out to others, however vulnerable that may make him. Big step!

And I have an 8# sledgehammer if you'd like to borrow it. \:\)

_________________________
Eddie

Top
#227579 - 05/29/08 11:30 AM Re: Some good news? [Re: EGL]
KENKEN Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 09/25/07
Posts: 762
Loc: NOTHERN COLORADO
Trish,
I am so happy for you and your BF. It is so nice to hear "good news" here on MS>

I hope soon I will be also able to "open up" and begin trusting others/friends. Seems I am living in this very dark/lonely world. I have so much to say and I don't trust telling anyone for fear of rejections, "boy that guy is stupid/crazy"

Very happy for the two of you.

Ken

_________________________
I AM A GOOD PERSON, I AM A GOOD MAN

From the Movie: Antwone Fisher

***WOR ALUMNI SEQUOIA MARCH 2008***

Top
#228413 - 06/01/08 11:32 PM Re: Some good news? [Re: Trish4850]
Liv2124 Offline
Junior Member

Registered: 08/02/06
Posts: 159
Loc: New Jersey
Trish,
It's definitely good news! I think that what seem like the "small things", are always some of the biggest and the best things overall.
Always,
Liv


Top
#228426 - 06/02/08 12:25 AM Re: Some good news? [Re: Liv2124]
rehpotsirhcs Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 10/10/07
Posts: 204
Trish,

I'm glad you are going to go to therapy with your b/f. Progress is always worh celebrating. Right now I'll play "At Last" by Etta James for you. I think it fits here.

How's your garden?


Top
#228572 - 06/02/08 07:36 PM Re: Some good news? [Re: rehpotsirhcs]
Trish4850 Offline
BoD Liaison Emeritus
MaleSurvivor<

Registered: 10/15/05
Posts: 3280
Loc: New Jersey
Thanks Chris. I'm shocked that you know At Last; it is a fabulous song, but even older than me! The gardens are wonderful. I'll post updated pics soon.

Liv, YUP!

Thanks Ken. Things are good; still bumpy as hell at any given moment, but good overall.

Eddie, I'm pretty sure I could barely pick up a sledgehammer like that, but if I need it, maybe you could give it a swing for me \:D

_________________________
If you fall down 10 times, Stand up 11.

Top
#228573 - 06/02/08 07:40 PM Re: Some good news? [Re: Trish4850]
rehpotsirhcs Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 10/10/07
Posts: 204
Just because I'm young doesn't mean I don't know good music ;\)


Top
#228576 - 06/02/08 07:49 PM Re: Some good news? [Re: rehpotsirhcs]
Trish4850 Offline
BoD Liaison Emeritus
MaleSurvivor<

Registered: 10/15/05
Posts: 3280
Loc: New Jersey
Oh so true. The classics never die - I'll never forget Disco Duck or Convoy *lol*

_________________________
If you fall down 10 times, Stand up 11.

Top
#228578 - 06/02/08 07:49 PM Re: Some good news? [Re: Trish4850]
EGL Offline
Moderator Emeritus
MaleSurvivor
Registered: 06/19/04
Posts: 7821
Originally Posted By: Trish4850
Eddie, I'm pretty sure I could barely pick up a sledgehammer like that, but if I need it, maybe you could give it a swing for me \:D


Trish, for you I'd swing it till I dropped dead. \:\)

_________________________
Eddie

Top
#228583 - 06/02/08 08:06 PM Re: Some good news? [Re: EGL]
Trish4850 Offline
BoD Liaison Emeritus
MaleSurvivor<

Registered: 10/15/05
Posts: 3280
Loc: New Jersey
Awe - It so nice to have a friend like you!

ROCK ON........Trish

_________________________
If you fall down 10 times, Stand up 11.

Top
Page 1 of 2 1 2 >


Moderator:  ModTeam, peroperic2009 

I agree that my access and use of the MaleSurvivor discussion forums and chat room is subject to the terms of this Agreement. AND the sole discretion of MaleSurvivor.
I agree that my use of MaleSurvivor resources are AT-WILL, and that my posting privileges may be terminated at any time, and for any reason by MaleSurvivor.