Yeah I'm having trouble in my group too. Nobody expects me to forgive my abuser, thank goodness. But I hate that some people bring in meals to group. One guy brings a main course of chicken with vegetables and potato. One counselor is eating Chinese food with a fork from a styrofoam dish.
I'm not going to get angry. Next group meeting I'm going to the best steak house in town and ordering a steak, with all the trimmings, and I'm going to bring it to group to make my point that way. I'm going to sit there and eat and clink my cutlery and let their mouths water.
Some groups have some screwed up rules.
Like, no swearing. Why shouldn't people swear when sometimes what happened to them IS an effing tragedy?
And no sexual content? Give me a break.
It sounds like your group is too authoritarian, without reasons.
Edited by hogan_dawg (05/28/08 01:36 PM)
I can say unequivocally that the lie of "To truly heal you must first forgive" has derailed more victims than the abusers themselves.
Andrew Vachs, 2003