When I get further along with my recovery (that is, when I feel like I can do this), I plan to go into being a therapist in some way. Either as a volunteer or (after scraping up some cash....:-)) going to school, I want to help those who have survived sexual assault.

It's amazing how much misinformation there still is about SA in general and male SA in particular. I must admit myself that I was as uninformed (and occasionally cruel in my ignorance) I was before I allowed myself to get help. Males, particularly grown men who are raped, are still treated as if they are the ones to blame. We aren't, and it hurts me to see how many of you are living with that now.

My experiences have been bad, but now I feel that I want to reach out and help. I really don't know why, since an experience I've had on the chat board literally drained the live out of me. Except that I want to heal with an open hand rather than lash out with a closed fist. I want to bring peace rather than further violence. I want to make a difference instead of do nothing.

The great thing here is that we all get a chance to do that here, and it's so rewarding.

I truly believe in the statement made by that great comic book writer and philosopher, Stan Lee: "With great power comes great responsibility." When I get more stable in my own mind, I plan on taking up some of my share of that.

Peace, brothers,

Scot

scot,
that is the strangest thing! spidy was my all time comic book hero. i use to have a very large collection of a variety of spidy titles. the key for me here is that while growing up, parker became a serious role model for me in my attempts to survive. "uncle ben's" words became very real for me. to this day i still carry that with me as a clarion call, but i have learned to better balance the extreme lengths i went to to realize the maxim "uncle ben" left parker. thanks for the memories, scot.

This painted a huge smile on my face and let me laugh for once (I've been down a lot lately). When I was young I always looked to the wise wizards and such like Merlin. I was absolutely facinated with King Arthur and his legends about truth and justice... the round table... all that good stuff. Just the other week while in a serious state of despair I watched The Lord of the Rings: Fellowship of the Ring and I was touched by something Gandalf said to Bilbo... he said, "You are a ring bearer. To bear a ring of power is to be alone. This task was appointed to you and if you do not find a way -- no one will."

Keep it real,
Josh

Scot,

I have had an "itchy trigger finger" at times, wanting to do something, anything, for the guys that are still suffering. Most of all I want to work towards prevention of child abuse, physical, sexual, emotional, the whole gamut of destructive behaviors that one person can unleash upon another.

I ain't there yet. I have learned to take some solace in the fact that by being here, reading and responding to men who have been so damned alone for so damned long, I am doing something. As a bonus, it's one of the things I need to do for myself as well, because time after time I find myself learning and understanding more about myself, or finding the next question to ask myself, when I do participate here.

Thanks,

Joe

Scot
It's a great feeling to put something back after you've taken so much.

I took all I could get, and I still do. I take support, friendship, advice and a kick in the butt when I need it. Why not ?

We're survivors of a nasty and deeply affecting behaviour that was forced upon us, and we lost a great deal of 'normal' growing up and maturing because of it. And to cope with getting out of the mess we need support, so we shouldn't be ashamed of asking and recieving it. It's not being selfish, it's being practical.

The people who give support are also not ashamed to give it. And neither do they judge those they offer the support to.
Why ? because they were probably 'there' at some point themselves.

Moving on from accepting support to giving it can be a natural thing for many survivors.
Who better to understand the problems ?

It's not an easy progression, and counselling / therapy training is VERY intense. And whether I fulfill my dream of finishing it I don't know. But I won't ever regret trying.
So that isn't essential to me. There are so many ways to help other survivors.
There's local rape crisis helplines, if they don't deal with men - why not ?
How about education and awareness ? keep your local politician awake and aware !
Just look at the opportunities the internet provides as well.

In my experience of survivor issues most of the work is done by survivors.
And that makes me proud.

Dave