Would you agree that the thing you need to do is let go of the hate? I don't mean forgive, but let go.
As I recall, the man who raped you is now dead. If I were in your position I would try to tell myself that I have absolutely nothing to gain from using up precious emotional resources hating a guy who's in his grave. I would tell myself that when I do that I am simply handing control of my feelings right back to him. Why should I do that?
I know this isn't easy to do. I worked on it in 2006 by writing a letter to the abuser (died 1994) telling him I wasn't going to waste any more of my time or energy on him. I went to the cemetery where he's buried and scattered the ashes of the letter over his grave. That symbolic act didn't solve the issue for me, but it did help. And now, every time I feel tempted to get worked up about him, I try to recall that act and tell myself he's not worth another second of my life. I need my strength for other more positive tasks.
Just a thought.
Nobody living can ever stop me
As I go walking my freedom highway.
Nobody living can make me turn back:
This land was made for you and me. (Woody Guthrie)