marissa, I'm really touched by the story of you and your husband.
It might just be that my own experiences are slightly similar to his, and that if it weren't for a really nasty shock last november which very painfully kicked me out of my "well I'm fine" thinking, I'd probably stil be there myself.
the thought of not just going through those experiences, but watching someone i CARED ABOUT go through them feels like absolute torture to me, and your feelings towards your husband, despite everything are absolutely beautiful, ---- in fact i'm now crying.
I can't really add anything to what's already been said. your husband has started the journey, ---- and that's the most important thing, even if the journey is bloody hard sometimes.
I really hope things get better, ---- you both deserve it.