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#221082 - 04/28/08 12:56 PM what was the one charateristic of your abuser.
justanother121 Offline
New Here

Registered: 04/14/08
Posts: 24
mine was protraying himself as a loving and giving person. a real spiders web for an adolesant


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#221093 - 04/28/08 01:12 PM Re: what was the one charateristic of your abuser. [Re: justanother121]
Freedom49 Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 12/30/07
Posts: 2723
Loc: Washington State
His ability to manipulate my emotions so that I would do anything for him. For his acceptance and approval. Which I did.


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#221123 - 04/28/08 02:43 PM Re: what was the one charateristic of your abuser. [Re: Freedom49]
mogigo Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 04/24/07
Posts: 1331
Loc: Colorado
Mine was pretending it hurt her more than it hurt me

She was wrong

Stay strong

_________________________
Thriving

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#221129 - 04/28/08 02:58 PM Re: what was the one charateristic of your abuser. [Re: mogigo]
dannym Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 03/24/07
Posts: 543
Loc: Boulder, Colorado
Mine was that he always acted like the abuse never happened, even immediately after the act. I'd be there with my pants down and he'd talk about the t.v. show that was on - I never knew what to do - so I pretended along with him....for 35 years.

_________________________
"You should listen to your heart, and not the voices in your head."

Marge Simpson

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#221140 - 04/28/08 03:25 PM Re: what was the one charateristic of your abuser. [Re: dannym]
simonsurvives Offline
Guest

Registered: 03/17/08
Posts: 58
Loc: California, Fresno
I had a relationship with mine she used to tell me things about herself that seems out of the ordinary like she told me that she too was molested and that it would hurt me and I deserved that.


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#221143 - 04/28/08 03:35 PM Re: what was the one charateristic of your abuser. [Re: simonsurvives]
Hauser Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 11/12/05
Posts: 2962
Loc: United States
He paid attention to and spent time with me. He talked to me. We talked about personal things, dreams, hopes, some pretty cool things that most 9yo's don't get the opportunity to share with adults. But, then he wanted things in return for his friendship, \:\(


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#221179 - 04/28/08 05:20 PM Re: what was the one charateristic of your abuser. [Re: Hauser]
KENKEN Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 09/25/07
Posts: 762
Loc: NOTHERN COLORADO
He was my older brother who I looked up to. He showed me love that I did not get from my parents. He gave me a sense of belonging in a large family of 7 siblings. He showed interest in me.

All of the things a 'big brother' should do, but then came the sexual abuse, the part I had to pay.

Ken

_________________________
I AM A GOOD PERSON, I AM A GOOD MAN

From the Movie: Antwone Fisher

***WOR ALUMNI SEQUOIA MARCH 2008***

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#221257 - 04/28/08 11:11 PM Re: what was the one charateristic of your abuser. [Re: KENKEN]
Elad 12 Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/15/05
Posts: 1176
Loc: on the coast
He would punch and knock the wind out of me after abusing me just so I would know that he had the power to take my breath away.

Dale


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#221290 - 04/29/08 01:08 AM Re: what was the one charateristic of your abuser. [Re: Elad 12]
EGL Offline
Moderator Emeritus
MaleSurvivor
Registered: 06/19/04
Posts: 7821
The common, dominant characteristic of each one was that they were selfish.

_________________________
Eddie

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#221334 - 04/29/08 08:30 AM Re: what was the one charateristic of your abuser. [Re: EGL]
roadrunner Offline
Administrator Emeritus
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 05/02/05
Posts: 22045
Loc: Carlisle, PA
I'm with Eddie; we see extreme selfishness in each case. But beyond that I think we can identify an incredible talent for detecting the broken or vulnerable boy and zeroing in on issues where he would be least able to resist.

Much love,
Larry

_________________________
Nobody living can ever stop me
As I go walking my freedom highway.
Nobody living can make me turn back:
This land was made for you and me.
(Woody Guthrie)

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