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#219818 - 04/22/08 09:40 PM Days Like Today
USFbull Offline
Guest

Registered: 03/30/08
Posts: 92
Loc: Florida
I just want to quit. I found out today that I'm going to fail two of my classes this semester, I can repeat them and erase the F. But hey there goes thousands of dollars down the drain. Basically what happened is I crashed off my meds accidently, and just "fell down the sttairs" from there, I was only off my meds for 3 days, but that led to depression, thinking about giving up, and just one thing led to another, and I had totally missed weeks worth of classes, so basically I fell behind in all the subjects I'm not naturally brilliant at. I started out taking 5 classes this semester, dropped 2, failed 2 and pass 1. I messed up so bad. I don't know what to do, yeah I had my plan about therapy, but unless I repeat my failed classes next fall, the F stays on my tran>
_________________________
Neither fear nor courage saves us.
Unnatural vices Are fathered by our heroism.
Virtues Are forced upon us by our impudent crimes.
These tears are shaken from
the wrath-bearing tree.
~T.S. Eliot~

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#219821 - 04/22/08 09:55 PM Re: Days Like Today [Re: USFbull]
onlyakid Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 03/31/04
Posts: 1552
Loc: New Jersey
You may want to talk to your therapist and then your school. I had problems with attending classes due to social anxiety and I was able to just drop out and remove the class from my tran>
_________________________
"Being with people that understand you...Priceless"

"and i don't want the world to see me, cause i don't think that they'd understand"

"You don't know what love is...you just do as your told"

"My life has changed. What you take as a simple thing, is not so simple for me anymore"


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#219825 - 04/22/08 10:23 PM Re: Days Like Today [Re: onlyakid]
USFbull Offline
Guest

Registered: 03/30/08
Posts: 92
Loc: Florida
Thanks I will do!

_________________________
Neither fear nor courage saves us.
Unnatural vices Are fathered by our heroism.
Virtues Are forced upon us by our impudent crimes.
These tears are shaken from
the wrath-bearing tree.
~T.S. Eliot~

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#219839 - 04/22/08 11:51 PM Re: Days Like Today [Re: USFbull]
ericc Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 01/04/08
Posts: 1960
I don't have much advice for you how to handle (though I think Jason's advice seems pretty good).

I really just wanted to let you know that I have been there. My spring semester of 1994 (dang, where did the time go??!!??) was something similar. I spent the previous fall semester trying to escape myself and suppress memories in a sort of manic fashion, and when I realized what an idiot I had been, well it sent me into a state of shame and depression. Needless to say, that spring semester of 1994 was for me one that was marked by an inability to get out of bed (I stayed up all day, and slept all night; all this in a crappy flop-house) and function well. I did follow up with a much better semester the following fall.

I guess what I wanted to say is don't be too hard on yourself in regards to this. The very fact that you are here means to me you are working on difficult issues right now (and kudos for that; delaying the process just makes it that much harder when you do face this stuff). Take it easy on yourself, and know you can always do better next time. How you handle the current situation I suppose really just depends on your options, but there are always solutions (sometimes not the most preferable, but workable none the less).

Eric


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#219855 - 04/23/08 01:37 AM Re: Days Like Today [Re: ericc]
dark empathy Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 11/26/07
Posts: 1937
Loc: durham, north england
Usfbull, I think this is something I can really understand. My phd has been going down the tubes for the tubes for the last year, ---- and the fee's for that are rediculous! I was in a state where I couldn't work due to anxienty and depression, but knew I had to, which made me feel more anxious, which made me less likely to get anything done, and so round the circle I'd go. My tutor really started to worry about me, think I'd lost interest in the subject and didn't want to continue, and the fact that I felt so guilty and anxious that I hadn't done any work, ha let my tutor down who'd always encouraged me and been supportive just made things worse.

I was getting panic attacks whenever I saw an E-mail from him, and couldn't bear to go and see him or even go anywhere near the department when fun stuff such as guest lectures was going on, which in turn made my tutor even more convinced that I just wanted to stop studdying.

The fact that my Phd fees are also really and insanely expensive didn't help matters at all.

Three weeks ago, things came to a head, and I actually got my parents to phone my tutor and tell him I was recovering from Sa, and request that I go part time. He's been really understanding and agreed.

Not only has this made things financially a hell of a lot easier, but also I've felt such relief now that I don't have that massive pressure, weight and panic to get work done. I've in fact done more work in the few weeks sinse I went part time than I had for the previous two months! If there's a day I can't work because of depression or general awfulness I think "well hay, that's how I am today" but on the other hand I find days when I can be enthusiastic about my work again, sit down and read, and even get some writing done.

I know from doing my degree, that this isn't as easy because there are subjects or modules that are just not nice, but I certainly think going part time would be a wonderful energy saver, sinse you don't have that pressure to work, and can manage things a lot better.

Pluss, it strikes me as much better to pay smaller, part time course fees when your actually able to progress with the work, than shell out lots of cash for a course your really not able to work on because of recovery work.

heck, sinse I'm no longer having to scrimp and save as much, I've treated myself to a couple of extra dvd's, ---- and I stil have more ready cash than I did before, lol!

Of course, I'm not you, and the us and Uk uni systems are indeed rather different anyway, but this has been my experience of a very similar issue surrounding recovery which I wanted to share with you. going Part time has been really useful for me, and I really hope if you decide to go down that route it will be helpful to you as well, afterall, there's no problem in taking longer to get a qualification, sinse recovering from Sa is probably even more important.

something I always think when i now considder I'll be doing my Phd for probably another four or five years is: well hay, I've got the time, and hopefully that time will be less horrible if I can work on my recovery.

Best of luck to you.

Luke.


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#219897 - 04/23/08 10:11 AM Re: Days Like Today [Re: dark empathy]
R82 Offline
New Here

Registered: 04/06/08
Posts: 1
Loc: Johannesburg, South Africa
jus wanted to say kelly Clarksons' :because of u and beyonces' listen have been fairly therapeutic over the passed 3 months \:\)
takecare


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#219903 - 04/23/08 11:13 AM Re: Days Like Today [Re: R82]
Roofus Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 01/24/08
Posts: 233
Loc: Utah
If your T is willing, ask him to call your instructors for those courses and explain the situation. If you have a medical reason, you may find that your instructors will listen and be reasonable. They will most likely give you an incomplete rather than a failiing grade. If they do, then you shouldn't lose the money... but they will make you repeat or complete some work that you did poorly on.

Goodluck


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