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#215726 - 04/05/08 09:31 PM the cross that i bare
kellticwarrior Offline
New Here

Registered: 03/10/08
Posts: 89
Loc: vancouver,b.c.,canada
oh these many years
i have a cross that i bare
through so many tears
this crown of thorns i wear

it's heavy and painful
it cuts at my very soul
it's embarassing and shameful
and it makes me less than whole

as i struggle through this life
i seek peace and understanding
i look for times devoid of strife
and situations less demanding

looking for someone to love
is not an easy task
i ask for help from up above
but i don't know what to ask

i need someone to comfort me
to hold me like a child
in my eyes what do they see
but a man so damned beguiled

so i sit and wait and wonder when
love will ever come my way
will she even want me then
and will she even stay

_________________________
Love heals everything

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#216283 - 04/07/08 07:29 PM Re: the cross that i bare [Re: kellticwarrior]
roadrunner Offline
Administrator Emeritus
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 05/02/05
Posts: 22045
Loc: Carlisle, PA
KW,

You have a knack for hitting the hard issues. My version of that was my fear of whether my wife would stay once she knew. What I came to learn was that my fear of total abandonment was without foundation; I was just carrying into adulthood feelings I had learned as an abused boy. I think this is what you will discover as well. There are plenty of women out there who would understand you and remain by your side.

Much love,
Larry

_________________________
Nobody living can ever stop me
As I go walking my freedom highway.
Nobody living can make me turn back:
This land was made for you and me.
(Woody Guthrie)

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#216285 - 04/07/08 07:34 PM Re: the cross that i bare [Re: roadrunner]
kellticwarrior Offline
New Here

Registered: 03/10/08
Posts: 89
Loc: vancouver,b.c.,canada
Larry,

Much thanks for your words. I find that "hitting the hard issues" through poetry is very theraputic for me. It is making the healing process much more bareable.

Kelly

_________________________
Love heals everything

Top
#216289 - 04/07/08 07:41 PM Re: the cross that i bare [Re: kellticwarrior]
roadrunner Offline
Administrator Emeritus
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 05/02/05
Posts: 22045
Loc: Carlisle, PA
Kelly,

I totally agree. Poetry somehow allows us to express how we genuinely feel, in a way that writing ordinary prose doesn't seem to encourage as well. I hope you continue to explore these possibilities and it's great you are finding them helpful.

Much love,
Larry

_________________________
Nobody living can ever stop me
As I go walking my freedom highway.
Nobody living can make me turn back:
This land was made for you and me.
(Woody Guthrie)

Top
#216292 - 04/07/08 07:54 PM Re: the cross that i bare [Re: roadrunner]
KENKEN Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 09/25/07
Posts: 762
Loc: NOTHERN COLORADO
Larry,

I am so glad for you tht your wife did stay with you. I disclosed to my GF 6 months ago. She is moving on with her life without me.

I guess I was not one of the "lucky ones"

Ken

_________________________
I AM A GOOD PERSON, I AM A GOOD MAN

From the Movie: Antwone Fisher

***WOR ALUMNI SEQUOIA MARCH 2008***

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#216445 - 04/08/08 08:39 AM Re: the cross that i bare [Re: KENKEN]
roadrunner Offline
Administrator Emeritus
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 05/02/05
Posts: 22045
Loc: Carlisle, PA
Ken,

My take on this is that there's no way of knowing, at least not in the short term, whether it's really for the best when two people decide to stick it out. Abuse is of course never the survivor's fault, but if his partner genuinely feels she can't continue under these circumstances, then perhaps it's best that she say so from the start, rather than limp along in a crippled relationship indefinitely. This way the two can both get on with their lives.

I'm not sure this will be of much help or support, but I hope it is. I think we all have a lot to offer a partner, but that partner has to be someone who can accept us the way we are, just as we have to accept them.

Much love,
Larry

_________________________
Nobody living can ever stop me
As I go walking my freedom highway.
Nobody living can make me turn back:
This land was made for you and me.
(Woody Guthrie)

Top
#454531 - 11/20/13 04:10 AM Re: the cross that i bare [Re: kellticwarrior]
victor-victim Offline


Registered: 09/27/03
Posts: 3007
Loc: O Kanada
i love this poem.
it reads like a song.

the feelings are clear, easy to identify with.
i sure hope you find the love you seek.

best wishes.
_________________________
Victor|Victim

War
Love
Poetry

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