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#21421 - 05/19/03 03:31 PM Post-Retreat Blues
JamesMichael Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 07/24/02
Posts: 134
I went on a retreat for male survivors a little over a week ago. It was just phenomenal. To be with 40 plus men who "get it" was a real sacred moment in my life. I think from now on I will view my recovery in terms of pre-retreat and post-retreat. I was so full all last week. I felt that I carried the other men around in my head and heart with me. After a rainy weekend, it's Monday, and one guy from the retreat hasn't replied to an email I sent. I'm down. Over the recent few days I've had man more flashbacks re my mother. Dreams also feature her and my father. My neglected and abusive childhood was front and center during the retreat. Stuff is churtling toward the top, and I'm all over the place mentally. Can't focus.

Just wanted to share this.

Recovering Men I Love You!

JM


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#21422 - 05/19/03 05:28 PM Re: Post-Retreat Blues
Lloydy Offline
Administrator Emeritus
MaleSurvivor
Registered: 04/17/02
Posts: 7071
Loc: England Shropshire
James
That's so good to hear, contact with other survivors is a strong experience, and frightening the first time. But ultimately well worth it.

Be strong.
Dave

_________________________
Go confidently in the direction of your dreams! Live the life you've imagined. As you simplify your life, the laws of the universe will be simpler.
Henry David Thoreau

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#21423 - 05/19/03 07:38 PM Re: Post-Retreat Blues
Ken Followell Offline
President
MaleSurvivor
Registered: 12/30/01
Posts: 990
Loc: Bradenton, FL
JM,

glad you had the chance to attend a retreat. They are a wonderful experience but it can make the "real" world harder to deal with. Take all the good stuff from the retreat and keep it with you for those times that canb e so hard to get through.

For me, the biggest thing I take fromt he retreats is the unbelievalbe strength of all the survivors and the knowledge that there is a place where I truly fit in. So much of my life I feel like an outsider, at the retreats I'm not.

Ken

_________________________
Ken Followell

Everything works out right in the end. If things are not working right, it isn't the end yet. Don't let it bother you, relax and keep on goin
- Michael C. Muhammad

"I get up. I walk. I fall down. Meanwhile, I keep dancing."
� Rabbi Hillel

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#21424 - 05/19/03 09:10 PM Re: Post-Retreat Blues
Wuamei Offline
Member

Registered: 08/19/02
Posts: 2700
Loc: The left turn I should have ta...
JM:

Brother this sounds so much like what happened to me last year after a week long retreat for men in recovery I went to. Right down to the flashbacks about my mother. Ditto my father. After a weekend retreat in March, more of the same.

My friend it seems for me these retreats bring out painful stuff but in a very affirming & supportive environment. Then you leave that supportive environment & go home, taking all that painful stuff with you: to some people who aren't supportive, to some who try but weren't there with you at that retreat when it came out, and to a lot of people you can't & shouldn't even tell.

And back to the routine of life...

It's good you are sharing this here brother. Know you are supported & loved here. Remember the great good of the retreat. And thanks for sharing it and sharing yourself with us. TC & TTYL.

Victor

_________________________
"I can't stand pain. It hurts me."
--Daffy Duck

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#21425 - 05/20/03 11:35 AM Re: Post-Retreat Blues
outis Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/27/03
Posts: 2260
Loc: Maryland USA
JM,

Thanks for telling us about it. I had tried to register for Mike Lew's retreat in PA 10 days ago, but I messed up the registration and then found an important family obligation that conflicted, so I didn't fix the registration.

It would have been my first retreat, and I knew that it would be quite an experience, but I hadn't really heard from anyone who had been on a retreat, except to read in general that "retreats are Good."

I guess you have a lot of newly ploughed earth to tend. And there's probably a lot of stinky stuff \:\) there, too. But it's an opportunity for growth, and that's a Good Thing.

Let us know how things are going.

Thanks,

Joe

_________________________
"Telemachos, your guest is no discredit to you. I wasted no time in stringing the bow, and I did not miss the mark. My strength is yet unbroken…"—The Odyssey, translated by W.H.D. Rouse

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