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#210398 - 03/12/08 10:27 PM Re: can i love God, but be angry at Him too? [Re: KENKEN]
VLinvictus Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 12/05/07
Posts: 273
Loc: NY
Of course one can be angry at God. But then again, I'm a Jew and "Israel" means "he who struggles with God."

Moses is a perfect example. He complains repeatedly to God why He gave him this rebellious and stiff-necked people to lead. In Numbers 11:15 he gets so fed up that he comes out and says to God "If this is the way You're going to treat me, then just kill me now!"

A lot of the Psalms, too, are anguished -- and angry - cries of why God doesn't seem to be doing what He's supposed to.

Of course, since the Shoah, those of us who still believe in a kind of personal God rightly have had cause to be just a wee bit pissed off.

_________________________
We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars.
~ Oscar Wilde

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#210412 - 03/13/08 12:04 AM Re: can i love God, but be angry at Him too? [Re: EGL]
Freedom49 Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 12/30/07
Posts: 2723
Loc: Washington State
Buzz,
Like everyone else has said the answer is YES of course you can. He is person. He understands you better than yourself. You think he doesn't know your mad at him? I was very mad at God for a while and we had quite a few heated (on my part) discussions. He appreciates the honesty in the relationship. It is like our CSA issues. If we do not acknowlege them and deal with them they will come between everthing and everyone in our lives. Same with God. He can't heal what we won't admit is a problem. Don't ask me how I know that. Thanks for posting this Buzz. I really appreciate you.


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#211000 - 03/16/08 07:48 AM Re: can i love God, but be angry at Him too? [Re: buzz_key]
kiwi64 Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 01/04/08
Posts: 11
Loc: Georgia, USA
Buzz,

There is nothing wrong with your thoughts and belief's, they are your own and you own them.

I was abused by a priest and I remember praying before, during and after to god to interven. This did not happen, so I was and still am angry at god. It was particularly relevant in my case, as some of the abuse took place in a church, gods home right???.

If you process your anger, as I am starting to do now, you may find that one of the fears you have is that your version of god, does not match that with what you have been told in the bible. It doesn't make you any less a christian to do this, in fact I believe that it makes you a better christian as you can truly understand gods love.

I have the same problem with intimacy with my wife. There is no easy answer. What happened to you changed your value system and your survival skills. Unfortunately there is no easy answer for how long it takes. I guess you need to ask yourself, does your wife trust you, and do you trust yourself. I have found that it is hard to trust my wife, but when I asked myself these questions, it was uncomfortable and very counterintuative, but I was able to let go of my fear and to start to trust her a bit. I have to say, it has been hard, but I am actually being ok with a little vulnerability. I still have the fear of abandonment with my wife, and i fear that if she know the full extent of my abuse she would leave me. But the way I see it in your case, your wife knows about the abuse, and she is still with you, she also says she won't leave you, so you have two for two in the marriage stakes.

Maybe you should consider what it would look like if you were truly happy, where you were able to share joy with your wife. My one goal in therapy and recovery is to be happy. With a lack of trust you never can be truly happy because you think that people will see you vulnerable and that is dangerous. The way I see it now(and it has taken a lot of time and countless thearpy sessions), is that we survived, we have a right to true happiness, and this comes from within when we can share it with someone we trust and love.

I know its easy to say, but ask yourself honestly do you deserve to be happy, and do you want to let someone else see you that way.

Good luck on your journey, feel free to email me if you would like to.

_________________________
"the only limit to what can be achieved is our own imagination" Albert Eienstien

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#211007 - 03/16/08 08:18 AM Re: can i love God, but be angry at Him too? [Re: kiwi64]
GateKPR4 Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 10/28/07
Posts: 955
Loc: North Carolina, USA
I don't believe in the God I learned through Christianity or the God of my Protestant upbringing as a child. I do believe in God for lack of a better word. I do believe I have faith in some collective conscience and good that permeates through the cosmos and is powerful and all loving. I believe we tap into this and it gives us the courage to go on. Divine intervention seemed to be a part of my life and has had a profound effect on my belief system. When I think of the God of my childhood I do get angry because where was the protection I deserved like everyone else that seemed to have. I know now that there were a lot of people that did not have this protection even in the church. A misconception of a confused child.
Today its different and I have much more knowledge than I did as a child. I have the faith of a child as I believe in something without reservation and with innocence, I believe that faith in whatever you choose has great power.

_________________________
I'm a normal person dealing with abnormal experiences.
The greatest discoveries we will find within ourselves.
Ricky
__m_τΏτ_m__
|| || || || || || |

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#211140 - 03/16/08 08:23 PM Re: can i love God, but be angry at Him too? [Re: buzz_key]
jcf1957 Offline
Guest

Registered: 09/11/07
Posts: 192
Loc: North Of The 49th Parallel
Hi Buzz;
I'd say that just about every believer in God will ask why do such terrible things happen to many God's human creatures who try to fathom with great effort and question why so many of us are faced with a living hell in our lives. I don't think even the greatest saints and theologians were able to fully; answer why chaos happens to so many human beings in this primitive wretched world. And honestly I don't have the wisdom to give all the answers myself. However; if I may; you might consider taking your time by slowly reading the story of ("Job") in the Old Testament. It won't answer all your queries about personal suffering in life; but it might make you understand that God doesn't work the way humans think. Is God insensitive to human suffering ?
Some might surely think so. Perhaps it's more likely that God is more concerned about the human soul than He is about physical and mental suffering. Does that make your situation or anybody else's on this site any easier ? No ! However; in the end perhaps it's all a matter of prospective and asking ourselves ("why we are really here") in this world for a short span of time. The philosophies of todays society will tell us its all about ("Me, Myself, and I") But; is that really true ? A man is never remembered for all his accomplished efforts and what he owns in life; but, rather the good he leaves behind for others.
Reading the biblical book of Job never took away any of my sufferings. However; it has made contemplate and look at the true meaning of life in a more humble way. Buzz_Key my friend I sincerely hope you find the puzzling answers your looking for.
At least your here among friends who understand the sufferings we are sometimes forced to bear. What was it I heard my little niece say coming home from Sunday morning catechism school. ("For Every Door That Is Closed In Life, God Opens A Window") I hope your days ahead are better my friend.



Edited by jcf1957 (03/17/08 09:07 AM)
_________________________
No affliction nor temptation, no guilt nor power of sin, no wounded spirit nor terrified conscious should induce us to despair comfort from God.

Today well lived...makes every tomorrow a vision of Hope.
Anonymous

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#211188 - 03/16/08 11:34 PM Re: can i love God, but be angry at Him too? [Re: jcf1957]
Freedom49 Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 12/30/07
Posts: 2723
Loc: Washington State
God's goal is to raise better sons and daughters. To teach us through life's lessons and build our character. He wants us to become loving compassionate generous persons. That takes dicipline.

Our enemy's goal is to fatten us for slaughter. To him we are food. If we are fat and happy so much the better. If he can tease and torment us and make us miserable and get his kicks even better still.


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