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#206862 - 02/22/08 11:07 PM dating and giving up on it
markgreyblue Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 12/19/03
Posts: 5400
Loc: Pasadena, CA
i would rather not be alone the rest of my life

but i get so aggravated by not finding a relationship

i am meeting very nice guys - but who are 'married' and seem

very stable themselves - and that's great - it gives hope

i know i am not perfect - and no one is -

i suppose partly i am jealous - partly it may come easier

once i am working - part of me thinks - it's just something

to work at - nearly like therapy -

i wish my sense of relationships weren't so f-ed by the abuse.

_________________________
"...do not look outside yourself for the leader."
-wisdom of the hopi elders

"...the sign of a true leader is service..." - anonymous



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#206863 - 02/22/08 11:16 PM Re: dating and giving up on it [Re: markgreyblue]
markgreyblue Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 12/19/03
Posts: 5400
Loc: Pasadena, CA
i think if i do have a relationship - it might have to be with another survivor.

_________________________
"...do not look outside yourself for the leader."
-wisdom of the hopi elders

"...the sign of a true leader is service..." - anonymous



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#206872 - 02/22/08 11:51 PM Re: dating and giving up on it [Re: markgreyblue]
Scoutvictim Offline
Guest

Registered: 06/04/07
Posts: 434
Loc: St. Louis, Missouri
Mark,

My biggest fear...

To grow old alone.

It's been 7 years since I've had a serious relationship. The bad part about that is the ones I've had, I screwed up.

As I look back on my past, my ex-wife and the 3 m2m relationships were more about me being their mother/care-giver. I know they were classic co-dependent relationships.

I have now come to the conclusion that I want a partner, someone who will share my life with me. Not someone who will live off of me.

hmmmmm.... What a novel idea....

Is it possible?????????????

I hope so, because if it's not.... wow ...an unmarked grave in the city cemetery.

Sorry, didn't mean to be a downer.

Luv ya,
Carl




_________________________
Shawn and Ben will always be in my heart....

Happiness is like peeing your pants; Everyone can see it, but only YOU feel the warmth.

Peebles, Ohio WOR alumni, Oct. 2007

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#206875 - 02/23/08 12:15 AM Re: dating and giving up on it [Re: Scoutvictim]
markgreyblue Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 12/19/03
Posts: 5400
Loc: Pasadena, CA
Carl,

Your response kind of reminds me of a line from the movie
"Sabrina" the recent version with Julia Ormond and Harrison Ford.

Julia is cheated on and the housekeeper says to her when she is
disparing. She says:

"Sabrina your life is a dream - and now it is over. I know!"

Ttyl -

Mark \:\)

_________________________
"...do not look outside yourself for the leader."
-wisdom of the hopi elders

"...the sign of a true leader is service..." - anonymous



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#206879 - 02/23/08 12:52 AM Re: dating and giving up on it [Re: markgreyblue]
Freedom49 Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 12/30/07
Posts: 2723
Loc: Washington State
Hang in there guys. Once your happy with yourself you will be able to draw them to you. I would marry you both if I could LOL
Take care
Take hope
Take your life back.


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#206883 - 02/23/08 01:06 AM Re: dating and giving up on it [Re: Freedom49]
Scoutvictim Offline
Guest

Registered: 06/04/07
Posts: 434
Loc: St. Louis, Missouri
Roger,

Hmmmm.....

Were you on bended knee when you typed that??????

If not, I won't say yes until you make it a formal proposal.

Luv ya,
Carl



_________________________
Shawn and Ben will always be in my heart....

Happiness is like peeing your pants; Everyone can see it, but only YOU feel the warmth.

Peebles, Ohio WOR alumni, Oct. 2007

Top
#206884 - 02/23/08 01:19 AM Re: dating and giving up on it [Re: markgreyblue]
arronb Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/02/08
Posts: 1005
Loc: Perth
Hello Mark

I'm the last one to say anything about relationships to anyone (he says as he looks back over his shoulder at the carnage that he's left behind !!!LOL)
I have stopped looking because I have come to realize that I can't be in a relationship until I sort myself out ... being with someone just so I am not alone hasn't worked, eventually they find me out, it's unfair to them & me, it's like I'm cheating on myself and leaves me feeling more alone than before.

But having said all that I say ...
don't give up on yourself ... the next one might be the one ... hope springs eternal \:\)

_________________________
Keep Smilin'
arronb

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#206886 - 02/23/08 01:30 AM Re: dating and giving up on it [Re: arronb]
Scoutvictim Offline
Guest

Registered: 06/04/07
Posts: 434
Loc: St. Louis, Missouri
Arronb,

Hope Springs..... that's in Arkansas...isn't it?

Well I guess you could have one in Australia, that I don't know about.

BTW....I love your new avatar. \:D

Take care,
Carl

(sorry.... I'm in a strange mood tonight )



_________________________
Shawn and Ben will always be in my heart....

Happiness is like peeing your pants; Everyone can see it, but only YOU feel the warmth.

Peebles, Ohio WOR alumni, Oct. 2007

Top
#206887 - 02/23/08 01:43 AM Re: dating and giving up on it [Re: Scoutvictim]
arronb Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/02/08
Posts: 1005
Loc: Perth
Hello Carl ...

Hope Springs Eternal hasn't been a happy hunting ground for me ...

but the latent romantic in me is thinking ...

Hope Springs Arkansas might have better prospects LOL

_________________________
Keep Smilin'
arronb

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#206890 - 02/23/08 03:11 AM Re: dating and giving up on it [Re: arronb]
markgreyblue Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 12/19/03
Posts: 5400
Loc: Pasadena, CA
Hope Springs - wasn't that a Bill Clinton campaign message.

I'll take Hope Australia. Get ready Arron. hehe

_________________________
"...do not look outside yourself for the leader."
-wisdom of the hopi elders

"...the sign of a true leader is service..." - anonymous



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