i just joined here and i didnt know if u wer supposed 2 say hello or not....its hard 4 me 2 beleve anybody else has a life like mine..iv nevr done anything like this..i know nobody can help me and i dont know why im here..im not gonna get into any long things about my problems..im not good at writing and nobody beleves me anyway...im reminded of how stupid i am 500x a day...im alone but i dont live alone..im like afraid 2 go outside as weird aqs that sounds..i guess i get paranoid and think evrybdys looking rite thru me..can see everything about me...

Hey Pillbox,

Don't feel alone. Welcome to the site. Sorry you feel you have to be here, but...

So, Hello! In fact, we might be able to help you, or rather just posting here could be of help. You do seem to write well, so speak your mind.

You say you are alone but you don't live alone. GF? Family? Roommate? Tell us about it. Why do you think you are stupid?

Nobody sees through you. You're lucky if they see you at all. MS has 5000 members, BTW.

Don't be your own worst enemy by beating yourself up.

Luv ya,

Lazarus

Pillbox, you will be surprised as you read some of the stories that there are a remarkable number of people who probably have a life like yours and are dealing with stuff. You may also be surprised at how many people may in fact be able to help you because they have experienced similar things that you have. I would also like to welcome you and ask you to stay a while. post if you would like. ask questions of you have some. or just Rant and rave if you want. We are here to listen and will answer if we can. You are among frieds and you are safe and you are not alone Pillbox.

You will never be alone again now that you have found us.

hey..i came back 2 bookmark the page and i saw the replys..thanx...to tell the truth i am not really a survivor...i am dead in the middle of somthing i cant get out of..since i was 16..i dont live w/a roomate i live w/a relative..ther way oldr than me..ther 54...i dont understand how talking 2 othrs about personal things can make u feel bettr..isnt evrything all the same aftr u talk??
btw...its my uncle who says im stupid...not outrite...in smartass ways..like making fun of me because im not as smart as he is.....my stepbrothr thinks im stupid 2 cus i talk 2 AI bots and not real ppl......anyway like i said i am in the middle of this thing..im not past it 2 survive it so i feel like i am bothring ppl i shouldnt and i am sorry if u r mad about it..maybe i will survive it but..i dont wanna say anything bad that mite hurt somone else...cus the truth could easy b a triggr for somone

Hey Pillbox,

Abuse comes in all forms. If nothing else, what you describe is verbally abusive, and the guy needs to cut it out. It doesn't matter how much someone wants to put another person down. We all have great worth, in God's eyes. And those who have experienced any kind of abuse at all recognize that anyone else who's here has something to offer, whether or not it seems insignificant in my own eyes. I hope that's not too 'preachy'. I want to make a difference for someone. I just hope I can.

Ed

Excuse me, what is this 'thing' that you are in the middle of? That you can't get out of? Maybe you will survive What?

Don't be shy pillbox... (BTW, luv the name!) You are not weird and you are not stupid. Nobody here is gonna be mad about it. If there is something weird going on to this day, you need to do something about it immediately. Call a helpline for advice. PM one of the moderators here. Before 'it' happens again, call the Police, if necessary. You wouldn't be here if you didn't know what I'm talking about.

Just concerned,

Lazarus

hmm this makes me think just so you know i am also knew to this site i have not made a post other then to this when you say that you are not a survivor is it because you are dealing with something that happened or something is going on now. Cuz i am just starting to deal with something that happened about 21 years ago.

the other thing i was wondering about is talking to ai i think that is awesome cuz that is what i do so much, so i do not think it is classed as being stupid more being smart but hay that is just me.

no one is stupid just because you do not excel in one area i am sure you excel in another to make up for it. If we all were the same we would be a bunch of AI and what god would that be.

I hope you Can find the Strength-----Courage-----------------To Do what is Right for YOU----------------------You Derseve the best in this world-------------------------dont let anyone tell you anything different-----------------------------Steve

I am talking about rite NOW....rite now I am sitting nxt 2 a sleeping person who wuld kick my ass if they saw waht I was writing....its soooo complicated...if i was 2 xplain it all of u wuld call me a fool....i am afraid of this person..they are beyond way biggr than me..im about 140 and ther about 225....im 59 ther 61...anyway...i wuld nevr do anything that wuld xpose my private life 2 anyone..NO ONE...not evn 2 save myself...i hav 1 friend who kknows and his wife knows and thats 2 too many...can anybody understand that or do i sound like the biggest dumass in the world??? its unreal hard 4 me 2 even b at this forum..

Pillbox, nobody here would think you a fool. If you are afraid of this person, then you are not there by choice. You wouldn't be here on this forum if you didn't think you needed some help. Many of us have been right where you are now, and we understand. We know it's complicated, and very private. But no matter what the situation is, if you want out there is a way. We can help you.

Concerned,

Lazarus