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#203821 - 02/06/08 08:06 AM Re: Bad Childhood -- Good Life, Dr. Laura [Re: theatrekid]
Hauser Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 11/12/05
Posts: 2962
Loc: United States
Chris, that does not lessen the parents' responsibility to keep their kids safe from perps. My story is a very typical example of parents that FUCKED UP and were so absorbed with their own personal and petty problems that they couldn't even tell that their 9yo son was being perped all summer by an older man living down the street, a man that paid attention to me, had time for me, and talked to me.

Are you sure that you mean "women entering the workplace" or MAYBE you might mean "no-fault divorce laws"?

With no-fault divorce, all a woman has to say is "I'm not happy anymore" and SHE can leave, WITH the kids if she wants them, AND force the man to pay child support. WHAT'S THAT ALL ABOUT? Just because she's "not happy" anymore? Now, there is little doubt that this law saves SOME women from abusive husbands, but it's also used as AN EXCUSE by short-sited/selfish/stupid women that think it's "ok" to divorce for convenience. What about the needs of children to grow up in a stable family, even if the romance is gone? I'm 38 now, and I've seen MANY MANY MANY couples my age on their 2ond marriage now, simply because they "grew apart" or "weren't happy anymore". Their cheapening the sacred vows of marriage, and single parents can't possibly keep tabs and be properly involved in the lives of their children when they're fulfilling ALL the parental obligations of work, household upkeep, getting groceries, etc.

In staying on the topic of Dr. Laura here, she reflects many of the views I had just stated. Take them as you will.


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#203982 - 02/07/08 10:09 AM Re: Bad Childhood -- Good Life, Dr. Laura [Re: Hauser]
tartugas Offline
Board Member
MaleSurvivor
Registered: 02/11/07
Posts: 513
Loc: NYC
Hauser,

I'd like to recommend Dr. Joy Browne to you (well, to everyone really). You can hear her program here:

http://www.wor710.com/pages/46353.php

You can also go to her homepage which is http://www.drjoy.com.

Personally, I happen to think that Dr. Joy has a much more balanced view of things (and she has a PhD in Psychology, as opposed to Laura, who's Doctorate is in physical therapy or some such thing). I happen to find Laura unnecessarily abrasive with many of her listeners, and I think that's she's just plain wrong on some things (most notable her anti-homosexual bias). While I agree with much of the substance of Laura's thought, I still think Dr. Joy has a much better program.

But have said that, this is part of the reason I'm so impressed by Laura's book. I found it to have a degree of compassion for the victim that I had never heard on her program before. And I really do believe she says a lot that is of great value to those of us who are struggling to move past a bad childhood and move forwards into a good life.

_________________________
"I am not a mechanism, an assembly of various sections.
And it is not because the mechanism is working wrongly, that I am ill.
I am ill because of wounds to the soul, to the deep emotional self...."
Healing D.H. Lawrence

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#203989 - 02/07/08 11:05 AM Re: Bad Childhood -- Good Life, Dr. Laura [Re: tartugas]
Hauser Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 11/12/05
Posts: 2962
Loc: United States
Thank you for reminding me of her. I used to listen to her on a local station before it sold to different owners and changed lineups.

Joy Browne was for more tolerant in many areas as I recall. For instance, viewing porn and it's impact on a relationship. She doesn't automatically assume that it's "bad" for someone to view it, as long as the persons' partner has no objections or doesn't feel degraded or insecure because of it. She is a good talk show host.


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#204014 - 02/07/08 04:03 PM Re: Bad Childhood -- Good Life, Dr. Laura [Re: Hauser]
tartugas Offline
Board Member
MaleSurvivor
Registered: 02/11/07
Posts: 513
Loc: NYC
I listen to her every day (I keep a whole bunch of her shows on my ipod). One, I love the sound of the spoken word and I find her voice calming. Two, her insight and wisdom has actually been a tremendous help to me these past two years. In a lot of ways I feel like I'm learning from her life lessons I never learned growing up.

_________________________
"I am not a mechanism, an assembly of various sections.
And it is not because the mechanism is working wrongly, that I am ill.
I am ill because of wounds to the soul, to the deep emotional self...."
Healing D.H. Lawrence

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#204043 - 02/07/08 07:32 PM Re: Bad Childhood -- Good Life, Dr. Laura [Re: tartugas]
theatrekid Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 06/03/07
Posts: 702
Loc: oregon
Alan, It isn't healthy or good for a child to grow up in a family were the parents aren't happy togeather.

When i said i believe women entering the work force and being treated as equals is the cause of divorces its what i meant. I wasn't some how mistaken. Furthermore for you to say that the government should enforce people to stay married seems like a 180 degree change in opinion in what i have heard you say about government up to this point.

You say marriage vows are whats sacred i say vows arent sacred but peoples happiness and safety are what is sacred so if some one decides to get a divorce they have that right.

However i do agree with you that a child growing up in a single parent home is very sad it can cause a ton of blame and guilt for the child to carry around. but just because parents split up dosnt mean they are bad parents. so long as the parents are able to keep positive communication open between each other there is no reason why the child can't grow up being happy.
Christopher


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#204058 - 02/07/08 09:25 PM Re: Bad Childhood -- Good Life, Dr. Laura [Re: theatrekid]
Hauser Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 11/12/05
Posts: 2962
Loc: United States
Chris, I conveniently picked apart your words in order to further a point that Dr. Laura often brings up and that I have in common with. What I should have done was simply make a new post.


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#205217 - 02/14/08 08:08 PM Re: Bad Childhood -- Good Life, Dr. Laura [Re: Hauser]
WalkingSouth Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 08/30/05
Posts: 16263
Funny thing about Dr. Laura. Whenever I listen to her I'm alternately so pissed at her I could spit nails and in awe of some very insightful statement she has made.

All things considered, I don't have a very positive opinion of her due to the time I heard her bully and put down a woman who called in and wanted to talk about how she had been sexually abused by her brother who was 3 years older.

The good doc got angry with her and demanded that she apologize to the brother and to any other of her family she had told about the incident because mental health professionals don't consider it to be sexual abuse unless there is at least a 4 year difference in the age of the participants.

I think most of us who've been around this site very long have learned a very different story when it comes to this issue. All it takes is for there to be a "power differential" between the individuals for it to be classifiable as sexual abuse. The aggressor or abuser can at times even be the younger of the two if the power differential is in his/her favor.

At any rate, that incident with Dr. Laura drove the last nail in the coffin as far as I was concerned.

_________________________
“Life’s journey is not to arrive at the grave safely in a well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways, totally worn out, shouting ‘Holy ____…! What a ride!’” ~Hunter S. Thompson

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#205218 - 02/14/08 08:12 PM Re: Bad Childhood -- Good Life, Dr. Laura [Re: WalkingSouth]
Freedom49 Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 12/30/07
Posts: 2723
Loc: Washington State
I think I heard that one too John. I was just amazed that she could say something like that. I guess we all have our moments of outrageous stupidity. I know I have.


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#205259 - 02/15/08 01:21 AM Re: Bad Childhood -- Good Life, Dr. Laura [Re: Freedom49]
WalkingSouth Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 08/30/05
Posts: 16263
Quote:
I guess we all have our moments of outrageous stupidity.


Yeah, I hear you there.

_________________________
“Life’s journey is not to arrive at the grave safely in a well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways, totally worn out, shouting ‘Holy ____…! What a ride!’” ~Hunter S. Thompson

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