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#205238 - 02/14/08 10:49 PM gripe session
MarkK Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 04/02/07
Posts: 2502
Loc: Denver, CO
ok - to start with - there's no solution, so there's no need to look for one.
i just have to get this out.
i can't handle the pain. mental, emotional, especially physical.
the more i move into "recovery" the more i hurt
friends vanish
like they're afraid they'll catch something
my body is depressed. it's not just a "mood thing" - the only way to describe the pain in my legs and my joints is to say they are depressed.
i've lost what few friends i had
there's no one left to talk to
and 55 minutes once a week is not enough to cover half of how i feel, much less how to deal with it. or even simply cope.
i'm tired
alone
and in pain
yeah - ok - sure - call it a pity party
maybe it is
doesn't change the fact that i hurt
doesn't make it any easier
or less excruciating
someone just tell me why
without all the philisophical or religious banter
just tell me why it matters to try
i'm tired
depressed
alone
and miserable

and i just don't see it ever getting any better


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#205246 - 02/14/08 11:59 PM Re: gripe session [Re: MarkK]
mogigo Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 04/24/07
Posts: 1331
Loc: Colorado
It matters because it CAN and WILL change.

Trust the process

Stay strong
Mike

_________________________
Thriving

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#205248 - 02/15/08 12:09 AM Re: gripe session [Re: mogigo]
Freedom49 Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 12/30/07
Posts: 2723
Loc: Washington State
Yes you got handed a shit deal.
Yes it hurts like hell.
Yes it feels like it will never end.
Yes it will probably not be better tomorrow.
Yet it does in fact get better.
Yes it will in fact take work.
Yes it is worth it.
Yes there is more that one of us who care.
Yes there is more than one of us who understands.
Yes I wish I had something better to offer but I don't at the moment.
and Yes I am answering your post because I care.
Yes I would take you pain if I could but I can't.
Yes you can know that I hear you.
For what it is worth your not alone.


Top
#205270 - 02/15/08 06:17 AM Re: gripe session [Re: Freedom49]
arronb Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/02/08
Posts: 1005
Loc: Perth
Why does it matter to try?

Because you matter & you deserve more from life.

_________________________
Keep Smilin'
arronb

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#205307 - 02/15/08 11:23 AM Re: gripe session *DELETED* [Re: MarkK]
awakening Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 01/01/08
Posts: 342
Post deleted by awakening


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#205311 - 02/15/08 11:56 AM Re: gripe session [Re: MarkK]
KENKEN Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 09/25/07
Posts: 762
Loc: NOTHERN COLORADO
Originally Posted By: MarkK
ok - to start with - there's no solution, so there's no need to look for one.
i just have to get this out.
i can't handle the pain. mental, emotional, especially physical.
the more i move into "recovery" the more i hurt
friends vanish
like they're afraid they'll catch something
my body is depressed. it's not just a "mood thing" - the only way to describe the pain in my legs and my joints is to say they are depressed.
i've lost what few friends i had
there's no one left to talk to
and 55 minutes once a week is not enough to cover half of how i feel, much less how to deal with it. or even simply cope.
i'm tired
alone
and in pain
yeah - ok - sure - call it a pity party
maybe it is
doesn't change the fact that i hurt
doesn't make it any easier
or less excruciating
someone just tell me why
without all the philisophical or religious banter
just tell me why it matters to try
i'm tired
depressed
alone
and miserable

and i just don't see it ever getting any better




Edited by KENKEN (02/15/08 11:57 AM)
_________________________
I AM A GOOD PERSON, I AM A GOOD MAN

From the Movie: Antwone Fisher

***WOR ALUMNI SEQUOIA MARCH 2008***

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#205315 - 02/15/08 12:10 PM Re: gripe session [Re: arronb]
ineffable Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/07/08
Posts: 1371
Loc: state of holeecrapdood
ditto

like aaronb said so simply

because it is that simple

when I am depressed it is hard to feel anything except extreme sensations

so you matter

EXTREMELY!!!!




_________________________
:: "Anyone who can handle a needle convincingly can make us see a thread which is not there" ::


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#205398 - 02/15/08 11:27 PM Re: gripe session [Re: ineffable]
MarkK Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 04/02/07
Posts: 2502
Loc: Denver, CO
i appreciate the attempts guys.

thanx for trying

m


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#205399 - 02/15/08 11:46 PM Re: gripe session [Re: MarkK]
Freedom49 Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 12/30/07
Posts: 2723
Loc: Washington State
Don't leave us Mark till we get this cheer up thing right. We ar trying hard.


Top
#205405 - 02/16/08 12:24 AM Re: gripe session [Re: Freedom49]
mogigo Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 04/24/07
Posts: 1331
Loc: Colorado
we are trying hard \:\(

_________________________
Thriving

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