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#201773 - 01/27/08 03:04 PM Re: I came foward with what happened to me [Re: Dude.]
mike5 Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 08/01/07
Posts: 170
Loc: Cleveland, OH
Originally Posted By: Dude.
That's the thing, I don't know how to heal. By coming forward, I think sometimes all I did was open up a can worms. I'm thinking about taking anti-depressants to numb me.

Dude - your body knows how to heal. Trust it. And find some help. Talk to people here online and locally. Telling our stories is part of how we heal. Consider attending a weekend of recovery.

As for the antidepressants: numbing is not always bad. Sometimes it is a way to tolerate the immediate pain of our injuries until it lessens. But I'd caution you or anyone to avoid taking them without getting therapeutic help.

About coming forward: I've thought about doing that for a long time. Always figured it was too late. I haven't been able to find the guy myself. But your courage has inspired me to look into it further.

Mike


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#201806 - 01/27/08 06:32 PM Re: I came foward with what happened to me [Re: mike5]
Dude. Offline
Guest

Registered: 01/26/08
Posts: 106
Loc: USA
...............



Edited by Dude. (01/28/08 09:53 PM)

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#201841 - 01/27/08 07:47 PM Re: I came foward with what happened to me [Re: OKIE MIKE]
JustScott Offline
Greeter Emeritus
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 01/27/08
Posts: 2572
I wish I could remember enough to get an ID. Up until recently all I could remember were 4 seperate minors who abused me. Then recently when I began dealing with those, memories started popping up. I remember standing outside an adults bedroom, in the dark, very much afraid, and now I also remember an incident of being in a car with someone, being driven somewhere, with the same sort of feelings I had in the memory of being outside the bedroom. If somehow I remember enough to know who these memories deal with, you better believe I'll be hunting them down like a wolf pack. I do remember where the hallway is though, but it doesn't help me. It's a hallway from one of the row houses on the base housing on McGuire AirForce base in NJ. Every house had an identical layout, and my parents had so many friends all over the base that I really couldn't tell you specifically which one it is.


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#201843 - 01/27/08 07:53 PM Re: I came foward with what happened to me [Re: JustScott]
Dude. Offline
Guest

Registered: 01/26/08
Posts: 106
Loc: USA
.............



Edited by Dude. (01/28/08 09:53 PM)

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#201918 - 01/27/08 11:20 PM Re: I came foward with what happened to me [Re: Dude.]
OKIE MIKE Offline
Member

Registered: 02/13/04
Posts: 979
Loc: HULBERT OK
The problen that I an haveing with tracking down the person that raped me is that he is a Hispanic with the last name of Hernandez. That is the equivelant of Smith or Jones. But I do know his full name, rank and the army unit that he was assigned to when this happened . and he was born in 1944. But that is all that I know at this time.
If I could get the VA to coropate they have the info . But the fucking privatsy act gets in the way . Is there a way to force open the the government files ?

_________________________
MICHAEL

"I HAD NO SHOES THEN I SAW A MAN THAT HAD NO FEET"

"All I can do is be me, whoever that is"

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#201919 - 01/27/08 11:25 PM Re: I came foward with what happened to me [Re: Dude.]
LandOfShadow Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 12/11/07
Posts: 684
Loc: Minneapolis, Minnesota USA
You have a lot of strength and courage to have done this Dude. Good for you.

Since my abuse was 35-40 yrs ago, and my abusers were probably 50-60 at the time... I've never thought to track them down. Your story makes me wonder what confronting them would be like. Wow.

I also think the therapist is a terrific idea. Might have to try several, sometimes people don't "click" and it does take time. You clearly have what it takes to get through this.

_________________________
Et par le pouvoir d’un mot Je recommence ma vie, Je suis né pour te connaître, Pour te nommer
Liberté

And by the power of a single word I can begin my life again, I was born to know you, to name you
Freedom

Paul Eluard

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#202190 - 01/28/08 11:40 PM Re: I came foward with what happened to me [Re: LandOfShadow]
Dude. Offline
Guest

Registered: 01/26/08
Posts: 106
Loc: USA
Thanks for the replies, however, I will never post on this forum again.


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#202227 - 01/29/08 05:59 AM Re: I came foward with what happened to me [Re: Dude.]
frost Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 03/15/07
Posts: 1377
Loc: Eh?
Well isn't that a pickle.

Wishing you happy trails Dude. Unfortunate that things ended up this way but I think I saw it coming by the way that other thread was shaping up.

~Brian

_________________________
I farted so huge, my ass exploded. There was poo everywhere and it got into the fan too. What a fucking mess.

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#202238 - 01/29/08 07:38 AM Re: I came foward with what happened to me [Re: frost]
Lazarus Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 07/01/07
Posts: 851
Loc: Below the radar, USA
If only you had decided not to post in the OTHER thread, this one seemed to be headed in a helpful direction.

It's a shame, when someone decides to withdraw from the site. But I guess you have to want help in order to get help.

As Brian said, wishing you happy trails!

Lazarus

_________________________
"That which does not kill us, surely makes us stonger." - Neitsche

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#202239 - 01/29/08 07:39 AM Re: I came foward with what happened to me [Re: frost]
Dude. Offline
Guest

Registered: 01/26/08
Posts: 106
Loc: USA
Originally Posted By: frost
Well isn't that a pickle.

Wishing you happy trails Dude. Unfortunate that things ended up this way but I think I saw it coming by the way that other thread was shaping up.

~Brian


I'm shocked this forum is a "sponsored link" on the yahoo search engine. I have that entire thread saved. I will share my experience what happened with others when it comes to this topic. With statements like the ones below, this forum should not be a sponsored link for victims of sexual abuse looking for help. I will be contacting yahoo. Here are some of the comments.

Quote:
dude, chill out ok? "crucified"? .......... please

If I may say, I "pity" you


Quote:
you can like big boobs but still see gay tendencies within yourself which makes you freaked out


Quote:
Dude, your perp was not gay, even though he fucked your ass. Lots of gay guys fuck each other daily and have lots of fun doing it.


Quote:
Get over it. I'm sorry you were fucked.


Quote:
Dude, I'm sorry I triggered you again


Quote:
This is where we can duke it out. Are you ready?


Quote:
You are a pitiful, small minded man,


This forum should not be advertised on helping victims of sexual abuse. I will contact yahoo.



Edited by Dude. (01/29/08 07:40 AM)

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