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#199290 - 01/13/08 11:13 AM MOVIE: ANTWONE FISHER '''''Triggers""""
KENKEN Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 09/25/07
Posts: 762
Loc: NOTHERN COLORADO
My T last Monday suggested that I watch the movie above, Antwone Fisher, with Denzel Washington. I was asked by my T to write my feelings and emotions down while watching the movie.

I am presently writing a letter to my Perp. and working on confronting him, my brother, in the near future.

We, my GF, and I watched the movie last night. It deals with a survivor of CSA, verbal abuse and physical abuse, who through therapy while a marine does confronts his abusers.

I can only say for myself that the movie was awesome. The outcome is so powerful and has given me more power and courage that I too can confront my brother. Whatever his response back to me is, I feel I am getting the desire to confront.

I just believe that the movie is very powerful, positive and proves that no matter how bad someone tries to destroy us, we have the power to overcome.

If anyone has watched this movie or does watch it, I would greatly appreciate your feelings and thoughts.

Ken

_________________________
I AM A GOOD PERSON, I AM A GOOD MAN

From the Movie: Antwone Fisher

***WOR ALUMNI SEQUOIA MARCH 2008***

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#199294 - 01/13/08 12:04 PM Re: MOVIE: ANTWONE FISHER '''''Triggers"""" [Re: KENKEN]
James_dup1 Offline


Registered: 04/13/02
Posts: 1332
Loc: Wyoming
Ken,

I remember watching this movie. And it really hit home for me as well. When he was on that porch confronting his abusers I just cried. And like you it gave me hope, I mean I know it was just a movie but it does show that it is possible to move forward from this. He battled for everything all his life, but he never stopped no matter how bad it got for him.

Thanks for helping me remember this one. I'll have to go rent and watch it again.

Thanks
James

_________________________
I have more issues than Rolling Stone!


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#199327 - 01/13/08 05:59 PM Re: MOVIE: ANTWONE FISHER '''''Triggers"""" [Re: James_dup1]
Lou Offline
Guest

Registered: 11/10/07
Posts: 100
It may be just a movie, but it was inspired by the true life experiences of its title character....an awesome inspiring movie as to how he was able to take so many negative things in his life and turn them into something positive. God! I wish Denzel Washington was my therapist! He just got down to brass tacks as they say! Awesome!


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#199340 - 01/13/08 08:57 PM Re: MOVIE: ANTWONE FISHER '''''Triggers"""" [Re: Lou]
TJ jeff Offline

Moderator
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 08/07/04
Posts: 3389
Loc: Northern Wisconsin
as you can tell from my signature line - this is a very important movie to me - I own the movie - it's one of the first I can remember ever watching that deal directly and accurately with abuse

Please everyone - remember - the abusers tried to destroy us - they failed!!! - we are indeed so much stronger than them

_________________________
Who will cry for the little boy? - I will... - Antwone Fisher

Abuse happens in silence/isolation - Recovery happens only when that silence/isolation is broken...

TJ's History

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#199342 - 01/13/08 09:09 PM Re: MOVIE: ANTWONE FISHER '''''Triggers"""" [Re: TJ jeff]
Hauser Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 11/12/05
Posts: 2962
Loc: United States
I saw it. Great movie it was, especially since it had also shown how the CSA that happened in the movie, intertwines into the fabric of his life as he grew older, which is something many or most films about sexual abuse fail to convincingly convey.


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#200856 - 01/23/08 07:56 AM Re: MOVIE: ANTWONE FISHER '''''Triggers"""" [Re: Hauser]
roadrunner Offline
Administrator Emeritus
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 05/02/05
Posts: 22045
Loc: Carlisle, PA
Ken,

I thought it was an incredibly powerful film, and whatever criticisms we may have we should be grateful for any attention the issue of CSA can get that points out the depth of the problem.

One criticism I did have of this film was the way it presented the theme of therapy. Antwone learns to trust the psychiatrist, works through his issues, makes love to his girlfriend at last, and he seems to be all fixed up. But we all know it's not that simple.

Hollywood films - indie too - don't ever seem to get this right, at least not so far as I have seen. But like I said, it's great the issue of CSA gets the attention and Antwone Fisher does a great job in that department.

Much love,
Larry

_________________________
Nobody living can ever stop me
As I go walking my freedom highway.
Nobody living can make me turn back:
This land was made for you and me.
(Woody Guthrie)

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#200870 - 01/23/08 09:20 AM Re: MOVIE: ANTWONE FISHER '''''Triggers"""" [Re: roadrunner]
KENKEN Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 09/25/07
Posts: 762
Loc: NOTHERN COLORADO
Larry:

The movie was especially helpful to me because I am planning to confront my brother, my perp, in the very near future. The movie, Atwone, showed me that I need more strength and courage when I do confront. He handled it well, and I thought said the right words. I am sure in my state of mind, I would have either been crying or in a fit of rage.

Thanks for your words

Ken

_________________________
I AM A GOOD PERSON, I AM A GOOD MAN

From the Movie: Antwone Fisher

***WOR ALUMNI SEQUOIA MARCH 2008***

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#207763 - 02/27/08 01:16 PM Re: MOVIE: ANTWONE FISHER '''''Triggers"""" [Re: KENKEN]
menspeakout Offline
New Here

Registered: 02/05/08
Posts: 36
You rarely see a movie as earnest and heartfelt about a man coming to terms with the dysfunction in his life. I too cried during many moments in this film, especially when he confronted his abusers. It was a titanic moment, and one that I too dream about having that for myself some day. I wish we all had that, being able to live without hiding from ourselves or others. Having the strength to find and confront our pasts.

I'm not sure that I have ever seen a scene like this, but the one where Denzel hugs Antwone and tells him simply "I love you." That was a moment I wouldn't expect to be repeated in a Hollywood movie but it was incredible, courageous, and almost too honest for film. Men are emotional beings who need love.

This is a great film!





Edited by menspeakout (02/27/08 01:20 PM)
_________________________
Break The Silence
http://www.menspeakoutnow.com
http://www.womenspeakoutnow.com

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#207799 - 02/27/08 04:46 PM Re: MOVIE: ANTWONE FISHER '''''Triggers"""" [Re: menspeakout]
KENKEN Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 09/25/07
Posts: 762
Loc: NOTHERN COLORADO
The words TRUST and LOVE:

As this post comes up again and again, what comes to my mind so powerful is how Antwone and Denzel over time develop such great Trust and Love for each. I seem to not have the ability to Trust or Love like that. As soon as I feel someone is getting "close" to me, I immediately put up barriers. "They are after something" I get scared, either run away or hide, my issues or my feelings.

I know my T and my Group that I attend are there for me, but at times I feel I open up to them to much. They are looking or thinking to themselves that I am some quack/idiot. I am a nut case.

Thanks for bring up this post again.

Ken

_________________________
I AM A GOOD PERSON, I AM A GOOD MAN

From the Movie: Antwone Fisher

***WOR ALUMNI SEQUOIA MARCH 2008***

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#207823 - 02/27/08 06:33 PM Re: MOVIE: ANTWONE FISHER '''''Triggers"""" [Re: KENKEN]
marshmellow Offline
New Here

Registered: 02/13/08
Posts: 8
Yeah Antwone Fishers a great movie. Like you I feel it is very powerful which is why I still watch it when ever its on cable. Still get teary eyed every time too. What makes it even more powerful is its a true story. I'm pretty sure it was actually written by the real guy himself. My memory is a little cloudy though.LOL. Wish you the best with your letter and confronting your brother. Takes alot of courage man.

peace


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#208384 - 03/02/08 07:27 AM Re: MOVIE: ANTWONE FISHER '''''Triggers"""" [Re: marshmellow]
roadrunner Offline
Administrator Emeritus
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 05/02/05
Posts: 22045
Loc: Carlisle, PA
Ken,

If you haven't confronted your brother yet I would suggest that you read this article by Ken Singer, a professional therapist and one of the moderators on this site. It's a great resource for survivors planning a confrontation.

If you have already confronted your brother, could you tell us how it went?

Much love,
Larry

_________________________
Nobody living can ever stop me
As I go walking my freedom highway.
Nobody living can make me turn back:
This land was made for you and me.
(Woody Guthrie)

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#208428 - 03/02/08 11:00 AM Re: MOVIE: ANTWONE FISHER '''''Triggers"""" [Re: roadrunner]
KENKEN Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 09/25/07
Posts: 762
Loc: NOTHERN COLORADO
LARRY,

I have read Ken Singers' article which was a great source for me. My T who is working with me diligently in my desire to confront my brother, has asked me to write and rewrite letters. I have used Ken Singers' outline regarding confrontation. It has been very useful for me. I am putting my thoughts and things I want and need to say to him, my brother, into words. Must say it is very hard to do. I have cried and cried, but feel it is a part of my healing process.

One of the reasons why my T has asked me to watch Antwone Fisher is I need to be strong as Antwone was when he confronted his abusers. I am not there yet.

So to answer your question, no, I have not yet confronted by brother. But I KNOW I WILL do this. I have to for my sake of healing and I WANT ANSWERS. I have to know why he did this to me. I need to know why and how he could be so cruel to his little brother. I know I may not get the answers I am looking for, but if I don't ask, I will never know.

When I get my strength to do this, I will post. I know I will need the help and support of all my friends here on MS>

Thanks for caring Larry.

Ken

_________________________
I AM A GOOD PERSON, I AM A GOOD MAN

From the Movie: Antwone Fisher

***WOR ALUMNI SEQUOIA MARCH 2008***

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#208743 - 03/04/08 06:59 AM Re: MOVIE: ANTWONE FISHER '''''Triggers"""" [Re: marshmellow]
Still Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/16/07
Posts: 6602
Loc: FEMA Region 1
Is this movie triggery at all?

_________________________
I'm "that guy."

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#208805 - 03/04/08 11:33 AM Re: MOVIE: ANTWONE FISHER '''''Triggers"""" [Re: Still]
KENKEN Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 09/25/07
Posts: 762
Loc: NOTHERN COLORADO
Robbie,

My T. recommended I watch the movie and write down my thoughts and feelings as they occur. Yes, I was triggered during the movie. But I will say that the movie is put together well. No bad language or x-rated scenes.

My main reason for watching the movie is that I am going to confront my perp., brother, when I feel I am ready to do so. This is something that I have to do for myself. The movie ends with Antwone confronting his perp's. I have some ways to go yet in my healing and recovery, but I have learned much watching the movie. My GF also watched it with me. I think you might enjoy it.

Ken

_________________________
I AM A GOOD PERSON, I AM A GOOD MAN

From the Movie: Antwone Fisher

***WOR ALUMNI SEQUOIA MARCH 2008***

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#208835 - 03/04/08 02:44 PM Re: MOVIE: ANTWONE FISHER '''''Triggers"""" [Re: KENKEN]
JustScott Offline
Greeter Emeritus
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 01/27/08
Posts: 2590
I just watched this recently, and for me it did indeed invoke allot of feelings, but I'm not sure I can say that it triggered me, more than just stirring up those feelings within me. Guess we're all different in how we respond. One of my abusers was a female older than myself, so that certainly really struck a cord in me.


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