i didn't mean to start anything with my comment .

i don't buy the whole it's the family's fault bit. i think its something we've yet to uncover. perhaps god just got a bit more creative w/ some of us.

Nate,

*Snap*

Bravo!!!! ... BRAVO!!!!

Luv ya,
Carl

P.S. When are you coming back to MO?

if its because of something gone '' wrong'' with the mothers body, or is just plain ''wrong''.

Were does that leave people like me. I have tried to hide my sexuality from the world for most of my life. I would have had to leave the army if it came out. People i knew were anti anything different.

So if as some people say being gay is ''wrong'', then im double cursed. A few people on this site helped me get to the point in my life, were i can say to others that im bisexual.
With the help of this site i told my wife im bisexual and her reaction was i thought you were. A bit of the pressure has left our marriage and i can be who i am and still have the love of my wife.

When i look at people i dont care if you are gay, straight, bi, trans or anything else. We are all humans and thats all that matters.

So if i like vanilla ice cream with sprinkles and you hate ice cream. Am i ''wrong''.

Im not trying to belittle the post, but when i meet someone, all i think is.

Can i trust this person
Do i like this person
Ect.

At no point does the sexuality of this person come into it.

hehe - well i'll be in japan at least till august 09...maybe longer and well not sure if i wanna live in MO again - hehe. we'll see!

If I were to attach a label to myself I would say I’m straight not that my sexual preference, attractions or habits are the point to this very interesting thread.

I loved seeing the ‘example’ of duplicity in Jarrad’s post. There are 2 twin boys, raised in a stable family home where one chose male sexual preferences and another chose a female sexual preferences. It kind of blows out the dysfunctional/missing father figure ‘reason’. It also dispels to some extent I think the DNA thing (based on my limited medical knowledge that twins share more common DNA than non twins?). Don’t shoot me down on this – I could be totally wrong, but I think if you were to examine two ‘test subjects’ to ‘compare’ then twins would seem to be ideal.

Apart from that I think it may be more pre-disposition. Maybe that’s another way of saying DNA? I think of some who are predisposed to becoming alcoholics. Some who are could cite “it runs in the family” while others could not say that. I’ve seen similar arguments to support gay/non-gay preferences.

Cultural influences? I don’t think so either. Cultures where homosexuality is banned and can result in MAJOR persecution, torture and (according to what I’ve heard) – even death. I wouldn’t think men in those cultures would make their choices or preferences “just because”.

Religious constraints or liberalisms? Same as above I think. I don’t see how either would ultimately have any effect on the way somebody ends up living their life.

Speaking of that taboo – religion, as one who has a strong religious belief system, a person’s choice about their way of living life and their sexual preferences, favourite colour or anything else should not have that person looked down on or ostracised.

If a persons religious beliefs lead them to not personally believe that person X is living according to the way they themselves (person Y) should live that’s simply their belief. Religion is meant to accept the person unconditionally; perhaps not agree with what that person does in their life (according to their belief) but then who of us would agree with what car you should drive or which way you should style your hair? Each to their own.

Bottom line, the way I see it – I have no idea what leads people to choose their sexual preference. It seems by this thread nobody else does either.

Tom,

Sometimes people my choose to adppt a gay lifestyle at 20, 30 or 40 etc. is that society may have forced them into trying to be something they are not. I knew I was gay at a very young age, but I didn't admit it to myself until I was almost 30 and to other people at age 40. So I didn't become gay, I just chose to accept it at that time and follow my feelings instead of what I thought I was supposed to do. Some people might think that I 'turned gay' at that age, but that's not quite correct.

Lazarus

P.S. Tom, please don't post in red type anymore. It's terribly difficult to read for some of us. I had to highlight your text in order to be able to see it. Thanks!

Hi Lazarus

First, My apologies for the red font.. I changed it back to black.

Second, I agree with your ascertion that in many instances society may have forced them into trying to be something they are not(being str8). I was just expressing my feelings, just as u have, that even though they chose to do that, JUST AS I HAD, deep down they knew at an early age the TRUTH!

MY contention is with those that say they were straight and just became gay. I do not believe that is totally possible... somewhere inside there had to be homosexual feelngs.. but again that is MY feeling... and who am i to know. I just know how it is with me.

Thanks for taking the time to response btw.

Tom

Hi guys, just wanted to add some more info. I found Simon LeVay’s home page, and he has a brief article about the theory's. The Biology of Sexual Orientation

I also found a article about how some chemicals can effect the fetus. one of the chemicals is DDT, which if my thinking is correct used to be used to kill roaches. My mom was a waitress, and could of been exposed to it. When does it happen? Note this is taken from a transgender view point.
You may find the rest of the web site to be of interest. The Gender Tree

And last but not least is http://www.love-shy.com/ Which talks about guys that are straight, but are super shy which seems to fit me to a tee. Again we are talking about the male fetus in the womb.

Take care,
Clifford