I think he means Same Sex Attraction?

I read a book about this once. It was called 'Coming Out Straight' and was written by an ex-homosexual man. The theme of the book was healing. It's position is that men who grow up without a father figure are more likely to be homosexual due to the need to identify with their gender. The yearning for a father figure becomes a sexual need and some homosexuals feel satisfied when they have sex with other men. Others fall apart, feel guilty.

The book was easy to read and well written. I dont agree with everything it says but I do see how people troubled with their orientation can get relief - By allowing themselves to realize that their lack of a nurturing father was not their fault and they do not have to call themselves gay for needing what every man a needs.

Links:
http://www.amazon.com/Coming-Out-Straight-Understanding-Homosexuality/dp/1886939470

http://www.arr-the-kraken.com/straight/

Thanks Eric,

This makes sense to me. Still Irealize that is one valid and possible explanation.

Alexey

I don't completely buy into the 'absent father' theory. IF we took a survey of every man who claimed to have a rotten/distant relationship w/ his father, I would guess it would be a lot of guys. If only 10% of the population is gay,then these figures would not bear out. Same w/ sexual abuse. If 20% of the population has been a victim of CSA, then we should expect 20% occurence of homosexuality across the spectrum. I have 3 friends who are gay and all of them have a gay brother. None were sexually abused. The more IMPORTANT question I think is to ask-how do you live your life and contribute to society? There is no single answer to empirically state without doubt, what causes homosexuality. The religious right would have us think otherwise. I know they mean well and try to view this compassionately, but they do not have the right to be the morality police and define what's right for everyone.

Hi Alexey, its my understanding that the overbearing mother/distant father, psychological theory had pretty much been disproved.

While this book is getting old, it is a good start on the subject. The Sexual Brain by Simon LeVay Try and get it at your library.
In general, they are now leaning towards, a gay gene, or several genes that when combined causes a gay person. The other theory is that something goes wrong inside the mothers Womb while she is pregnant. Ether way there would be no choose for the person who is gay.

Edit, here is a good article about it. What Makes People Gay? By Neil Swidey | August 14, 2005

Take care,
Clifford

something goes wrong?wow sounds kinda homophobic to me ! not your response cowboy ,just the theroy.

Hi Evanesence, if it sounds kinda homophobic, that must be my homophobic leaking through. In real life I stay away from gay men, if possible. Even though I was attracted to and had a affair with a gay man. He has been the only man I was attracted to so far, took me totally by surprise, that my fear of him could turn into attraction. Even with all that, I still fear and stay away from gay men.
I edited the post above, added a link to a article, please read.

Take care,
Clifford

I have a question from this thread that I hope will not raise a bunch of ire:

Jarrad said the following, and I've heard other examples stated in the past by others....

"they knew he was gay as young as 5"

I seriously doubt this boy was sexually attracted to other boys at 5, since sex/puberty is nowhere in site at 5 years old. How did they "know" he was gay? What does this mean?

i'm not gay either ,it's just hard to believe anyone would try to say it was something wrong with the mothers body ,that made somebody gay ,what if your bisexual ?mother must have dropped you on your head ?it's kinda funny really ,but if i was gay it would piss me off.

I guess it depends if you are going to persecute an entire large group of people for something that happens "naturally", i.e. "goes wrong". Lot's of things "go wrong" with people. Do we persecute people with poor vision, cleft palate, hemophilia, etc.??

What pisses me off is the political fear mongering (they want your children!!), the extreme prejudices and fears without factual basis, and ignorance (fears of catching AIDS by touching, etc). That's what has gone wrong. Same sex attraction is just a natural phenomena, for whatever cause.

Looking for causes in our culture is usually prejudice in disguise.

As for "they knew he was gay as young as 5", people seem to mean, looking back, they and/or others recognized something different in themselves, often something about accepting gender roles. The boy who loves to dress up in costumes, somewhat feminine or sissy, likes dolls. Or the girl who liked playing with trucks in the sandbox, tomboys. Didn't work for me. Nothing's simple here.