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#196140 - 12/21/07 09:10 AM Re: Boy, 15, gets prison time for molesting boys [Re: GateKPR4]
Ken Singer, LCSW Offline
Moderator Emeritus
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 08/24/00
Posts: 5778
Loc: Lambertville, NJ USA
Bocaj:
This is not a matter of only two choices-- 23 years in jail or walk free.

Let's assume this kid is a sadistic, program failed repeat offender. (He could also be less than this extreme). There are secure (locked) programs that provide sex offense-specific treatment throughout the country. Every state, including Michigan (where I believe the story originates) has a variety of specialized programs for juveniles that should be able to accomodate him.

So even if he is the "worst of the worse", he should be given a shot at rehabilitation, in my opinion, which is also based on experience in working with juvenile sex offenders in a cariety of settings, from outpatient, community based, to residential treatment, and max secure (for juveniles) based in correctional facilities. As I said before, research shows that treatment works for these kids at a very high success rate so it is not about just locking him up or letting him go and abuse more kids.
Ken


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#196142 - 12/21/07 09:11 AM Re: Boy, 15, gets prison time for molesting boys [Re: GateKPR4]
BJK Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 08/02/07
Posts: 1526
bocaj:

Everyone sees that side of the issue. Yes, incarcerating him will protect children while he is incarcerated, but the fact is, incarcerating him just because it makes us feel better to give him "justice" does nothing more than perpetuate abuse.

All of us are on the same side here. We all want to protect children. My view is that by locking up perps and forgetting about them, by punishing them with knee-jerk reactions that are nothing more than hell-bent excuses for revenge, we are doing more to endanger children then we are doing to protect them.

And while we're at it, we need to do away with sex offender registries.

Bryan

_________________________
Revenge is nothing more than another way of perpetuating abuse.

What the world needs now
Is some new words of wisdom
Like la la la la la la la la la.
-David Lowery

Having a friend who will keep a secret for you is worthless compared to a friend who won't keep a secret from you.

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#196153 - 12/21/07 09:32 AM Re: Boy, 15, gets prison time for molesting boys [Re: BJK]
James_dup1 Offline


Registered: 04/13/02
Posts: 1332
Loc: Wyoming
Bryan,

I am not trying to start anything here just wondering what your thought behind getting ride of the sex offender registries is? I personaly don't think they work the way they were intended too. They give access to personal information about people that I do not believe should be out there. But thats my thoughts on it. Just wondered what yours were.

James

_________________________
I have more issues than Rolling Stone!


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#196164 - 12/21/07 11:22 AM Re: Boy, 15, gets prison time for molesting boys [Re: Stephen_5]
ScottyTodd Offline
Administrator Emeritus
MaleSurvivor
Registered: 02/12/03
Posts: 1561
Loc: Pennsylvania
Steve - I can understand the pressure of those two standing by the phone listening to your every word. My sons and I had a system we devised with a code word. When they felt peer pressure to do something or go somewhere they didn't feel was right, they would tell the guys, "I have to get permission from my dad." During the phone call, my sons would repeat the word REALLY three times; such as,"Dad, I really, really really want to go with the guys!" No matter how angry they got at me on the phone, my answer was always "NO!" I would pick them up or they'd drive home. This system stopped a lot of potential problems. Teens are so suseptable to peer pressure.

I'm glad you had the strength and foresight to get out of a tight spot!!

Howard

PS: This was sent to the previous page in response to Steve V's post. Sorry! When I read the previous posts before this - I was really confused!!



Edited by ScottyTodd (12/21/07 11:25 AM)
_________________________
If you think you can or you can't - you're right!.......anon
It's never too late to have a happy childhood!.....anon
You're very normal for the abnormal situation you've been through..............S. Todd

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#196171 - 12/21/07 01:18 PM Re: Boy, 15, gets prison time for molesting boys [Re: ScottyTodd]
BJK Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 08/02/07
Posts: 1526
My first point against the registries is that they don't do any good, and that would be enough of a reason for me to abolish them. They create a false sense of security while promoting mass hysteria. Think about it for a second. Most of these violent criminals that the registry is in place for...how many of them actually abuse children in their own neighborhoods?

Meanwhile, cities and states are allowed to pass laws restricting where registered sex offenders can live, and rental properties can decide not to rent to a person because of sex offender status. This means that in the town in which I live, there are very few places for a registered sex offender to live. This creats slums and urban decay, but there is a more important aspect to consider.

There are currently, to my knowledge, three convicted sex offenders in my city who are homeless for no other reason than that they cannot find an affordable place to live. A feeling of hopelessness tends to be a primary cause of why people tend to act out, and these people who are homeless because they are on the sex offender registry scare me more than anything at this point in time.

However, if we were going to take this a step further, can you imagine having to live your life with the stigmatism of being on such a registry? If I had spent my time in prison, and then was forced to face this kind of scrutiny upon my release, I can guarantee to you that I would do everything in my power to get myself put back in prison. To me, being in prison is preferrable to living in a society that views me as a monster.

My honest belief is that the sex offender registries do more to harm our children than they do to protect them.

Bryan

_________________________
Revenge is nothing more than another way of perpetuating abuse.

What the world needs now
Is some new words of wisdom
Like la la la la la la la la la.
-David Lowery

Having a friend who will keep a secret for you is worthless compared to a friend who won't keep a secret from you.

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#196177 - 12/21/07 02:14 PM Re: Boy, 15, gets prison time for molesting boys [Re: BJK]
Still Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/16/07
Posts: 6418
Loc: 2.5 NATO Nations
Originally Posted By: BJK
...can you imagine having to live your life with the stigmatism of being on such a registry?


I see what you are saying Bryan...I really do...but I also see another "life-sentence" in these crimes. I mean, here I am, a mess, 30+ years later! So the perps have a hard time finding residence, jobs etc.

I have a hard time finding peace, self acceptance, and keeping jobs. Let's not forget that there's a wife and 2 children who live with the residual effects of a 30+ yo crime spree of those perps as well.

Yeah, the registry may be stupid in that it does not do seem to do much other than help politicians' posture. But the scales of justice are still not standing even when you examine the survivor's life sentence.

_________________________
This nation has lost its mind!

The Aftermath Video

The Water Buffalo Song

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#196182 - 12/21/07 03:20 PM Re: Boy, 15, gets prison time for molesting boys [Re: Still]
BJK Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 08/02/07
Posts: 1526
I know what you're saying, Rob, but I don't see how comparing the turmoil that a perp endures to the turmoil a victim endures is even relevant. The goal is to protect children, not to enact revenge.

_________________________
Revenge is nothing more than another way of perpetuating abuse.

What the world needs now
Is some new words of wisdom
Like la la la la la la la la la.
-David Lowery

Having a friend who will keep a secret for you is worthless compared to a friend who won't keep a secret from you.

Top
#196184 - 12/21/07 03:34 PM Re: Boy, 15, gets prison time for molesting boys [Re: BJK]
Still Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/16/07
Posts: 6418
Loc: 2.5 NATO Nations
Originally Posted By: BJK
The goal is to protect children, not to enact revenge.


Agreed! If people really want to protect children, we need to educate kids to avoid, fight and report any attempted or actual SA. We need to remove the social taboos, fears and judgements that these perps count on to maintain the victim's silence.

But yeah...the registry is a joke. Since when has any political body done anything well?

_________________________
This nation has lost its mind!

The Aftermath Video

The Water Buffalo Song

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#196194 - 12/21/07 06:03 PM Re: Boy, 15, gets prison time for molesting boys [Re: BJK]
AndyJB2005 Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 11/14/06
Posts: 1242
Loc: Saint Paul, Minnesota
Originally Posted By: BJK
To me, being in prison is preferrable to living in a society that views me as a monster.


I can assure you that prison is no vacation for sex offenders. It's not just 3 squares a day, and a comfy bed. They are the sh*t of the sh*t in there, and if people find out what you're in for -- especially if it's a young child vs. say, a teen, that was your offense, they will let you have it with all they have. Violent rapes, physical violence, possibly worse. Murderers and regular rapists are viewed in higher regard to other inmates.

I've spoken with a lot of recovering offenders, and all say they NEVER wanna go back.

It's almost a fate worse than death, I've heard.

_________________________
Life's disappointments are harder to take when you don't know any swear words. -- Calvin (Calvin and Hobbes)

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#196200 - 12/21/07 06:49 PM Re: Boy, 15, gets prison time for molesting boys [Re: AndyJB2005]
BJK Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 08/02/07
Posts: 1526
Originally Posted By: AndyJB2005

It's almost a fate worse than death, I've heard.


Then death is what my choice would be, and to contemplate what a person is capable of when his own life ceases to matter is frightening indeed.

Bryan

_________________________
Revenge is nothing more than another way of perpetuating abuse.

What the world needs now
Is some new words of wisdom
Like la la la la la la la la la.
-David Lowery

Having a friend who will keep a secret for you is worthless compared to a friend who won't keep a secret from you.

Top
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