Today was my first therapy session. Larry (roadrunner) thought it would be helpful if I shared my experience. Here goes....

I had never received therapy before. Therapy was a place I thought crazy adults go to when they need extreme help. My sanity has been questionable at times, but I would never have said I needed professional help. I am a strong, independent person who is perfectly capable of dealing with my own issues. This was my attitude going into therapy. If it weren't for my mom and step-dad, I probably wouldn't have sought out therapy at all.

My step-dad, and my mom, felt it was necessary I see a therapist because of a few recent personal issues I'm dealing with as an abused teenager. I think they both really want to help me yet they have no idea how. My relationship with my parents has been rocky over the years, especially with my step-dad (my previous step-dad sexually abused me). I guess by trying to find help for me they are caring about me the best way they can.

I don't like the idea of having to ask for help. I'd rather be stoic and strong than have to allow my weaknesses to show. The reality is... I do need help. I am hurting badly on the inside by things that seem to just not go away. I'm not sure any one can help some things in my life, but I'm willing to try.

The drive to my therapist's office was dreadful. I had to prepare myself because I knew my personal "secrets" would soon be exposed to a complete stranger. I kept going over worst-case scenarios in my head. I feared the therapist guy would sexually abuse me. That made complete sense to me at the time and it made me extremely pissed off at my parents for wanting it to happen.

When we arrived at my therapists "office" I was a bit surprised. From the outside, it looked like a crummy, run down old house. I didn't expect for a house to be in the middle of the downtown area. But I'm not complaining about it. I think it's cool that this therapist decided to go an unconventional route. A regular business building would be way scarier to enter than an inviting home.

Immediately inside the house were these two couches facing each other. My parents went in first and sat down side by side on one couch. I decided to take the opposite couch, sitting across from a beaten, old door with a sign that reads "THERAPY IN SESSION: Do Not Enter". It kind of calmed me to take a scope of the house while I waited. Classical music was playing loud enough to drown whatever conversation the therapist was having in his session. The walls were a deep shade of pink or a light shade of purple, as were the couches. I found these things kind of overly feminine, but hey... I'm not one to judge.

It's.... 1:30 AM and I've lost track where I was headed with this reflection. Since I have to wake up in about six hours to go to prison... I mean to go to school... I am going to skip to the end of the session. The important things I learned from therapy are: 1. My therapist is a cool guy 2. He beats having to talk to my parents about these things and 3. Feelings are important. Hopefully, this therapy will continue to be a positive experience for me.

....

Thank you for that brief summary of your expericence it is very encouraging to hear

rehpotsirhcs,

Like I said last night, YOU DID IT!!! It's always scary when one of us starts into therapy; we really don't know what to expect and it's the abuse that gives us the ideas we have when we begin. I'm just so glad your experience has let you see how false all those ideas are.

I hope you'll keep talking about this. And you're right - feelings are so important. That's what the T can help us with: looking at those feelings to see what we can do about them.

Much love,
Larry

I'm not sure if you realize how important this is, but even if this is all you got out of your first session, I have to say it was an overwhelming success.

Thank you for sharing. Your feelings about going into the session and how you worked through them are just as important as the session itself. I know there are a lot of guys on this site who are extremely nervous about seeing a therapist. You may have just helped someone take that step.

Take care

Bryan

rehpotsirhcs,

Man.. thats GREAT. Yes let me echo Larry. YOU DID IT!!!!.



I have never doupted this about you. And seeing a T doesn't change this about you. In fact I see you as even a stronger person now. I wish I could have had the courage you are showing when I was a yougn man. Your strenth inspire me. Thank you.



We understand that pain. But they do get better. Promise.



LOL.. reminds me of my first visit to a T. You did better than me. I ended up pukeing in the trashcan. LOL Good job my friend.



Good. I bet he's thinking the same thing about you. Because you are.




I may be older than dirt, but remember my teens years. Heck getting a tooth pulled was better than talking to parents LOL



This is a very powerful statement here. You have seen something it took me a couple of years to figure out. Again GREAT JOB!!!.



Don't mind if I add my "hopes" on top of yours? Because I do hope that as well.


I am very proud of you man. You took a very hard and scary step yesterday. You should be proud as well. See ya in chat.

Your friend
James

Great job, Chris! I'm so happy you decided to give therapy a try. I'm glad it was a good experience.

You seem very mature and wise beyond your years from what you said in your post. I didn't come up with some of that stuff until I was in my 20s.

Please don't worry about telling your therapist things. Trust me, they've heard it ALL, and they just want to help people -- or they wouldn't be in that kind of work. I doubt you can shock him.

No promises therapy will be easy and quick, but like they say in 12-step: It works if you work it; you're worth it!

Chris,

I am glad for you, and YES, it is a huge progress.

I hope your T will be a trusted partner in your healing process.

Alexey

Go Chris!!!! I'm glad you see this as a positive step. It took me a little over 2 years to open up to my T but it has been worth it.
My first visit was scary too, I thought (they are going to lock me up, I'm going to jail, I'm scum, yada yada yada...) none of that happened. It was also in a house in the city, relaxing compared to brick & steel. I am happy for you. I wish I was as brave as you are at your age. WTG
peace
Rick

Way To Cool--------Good For You------------I Am Just Learning About How Important Feelings Are----------------------Keep On The Right Path----------------------Steve