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#191272 - 11/13/07 11:03 AM Re: Masturbation and Spirituality [Re: River]
thesun3 Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 11/06/07
Posts: 49
Well put River & Hauser.
Masturbating can get out of control and knock whatever is normal out the window. My problem is two-fold. Masturbation and Porn. I won't do one without the other. I decided to stop because I realized how it was desroying my capacity to be intimate with my wife and taking too much time from work.
I too want to understand sex as "optional"..."icing on the cake"...rather than a form of escapism.....
I have an understanding sponsor and I am working on a healthier expression of my sexuality.
God...the abuse really screwed me up......
Good to read your posts River and Hauser..and keep up the good work.

_________________________
In the depth of winter, I finally learned that within me there lay an invincible summer.
Camus

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#191296 - 11/13/07 03:08 PM Re: Masturbation and Spirituality [Re: Hauser]
Darren Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/12/07
Posts: 120
Loc: The High Seas
Originally Posted By: Hauser

I've never done this before. I'm in my 7th week without any kind of sex whatsoever.


I've done this twice, Hauser, but never made it to seven weeks! I'm impressed. Once was at a Christian summer camp and I lasted two weeks before I couldn't stand it anymore. Second I made a pact with my Christian room-mate to abstain for as long as possible; think I lasted 3 weeks, but I lasted longer than he did! Can't believe I'm writing about this, but your post brought back some bitter-sweet memories of trying to live a more wholesome life as a born-again Christian. Of course I'm deeply steeped in sin now. No going back for me I'm afraid! \:\) Seriously, though, even as a Christian, I found no tangible benefit to abstaining from Ming, except perhaps for the mind-blowing orgasm that I experienced upon resuming! \:\)

_________________________
“Now and then we had a hope that if we lived and were good, God would permit us to be pirates” -Mark Twain

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#191331 - 11/13/07 09:28 PM Re: Masturbation and Spirituality [Re: River]
bp83 Offline
Member

Registered: 06/29/06
Posts: 111
Loc: Arkansas
I went for a whole year without masturbating when I was 16!!! But only because I had a messed up view of God and thought I'd go to hell for it.



Edited by bp83 (11/13/07 09:28 PM)
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Scott

"Life is for living, we all know, and I don't want to live it alone..."-Chris Martin

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#191421 - 11/14/07 06:50 PM Re: Masturbation and Spirituality [Re: bp83]
Darren Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/12/07
Posts: 120
Loc: The High Seas
Wow Scott, that's amazing... especially being 16 and raging with hormones. You get the Ming abstinence award!

_________________________
“Now and then we had a hope that if we lived and were good, God would permit us to be pirates” -Mark Twain

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#191435 - 11/14/07 08:10 PM Re: Masturbation and Spirituality [Re: bp83]
BJK Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 08/02/07
Posts: 1526
Originally Posted By: bp83
I went for a whole year without masturbating when I was 16!!! But only because I had a messed up view of God and thought I'd go to hell for it.


From age 13 to 14, I abstained from masturbating completely after what the Catholic church preached about it. That was a span of time longer than a year and a half...shorter than two years.

I went almost three months this past Summer because I was in too deep of a depression to even contemplate doing anything that would make me feel good.

Lately, it's been a once a week thing, mostly just to prevent the dreams.

Bryan

_________________________
Revenge is nothing more than another way of perpetuating abuse.

What the world needs now
Is some new words of wisdom
Like la la la la la la la la la.
-David Lowery

Having a friend who will keep a secret for you is worthless compared to a friend who won't keep a secret from you.

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#191639 - 11/16/07 04:16 PM Re: Masturbation and Spirituality [Re: Woundedheart]
reality2k4 Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 07/06/04
Posts: 6838
Loc: Stuck between water, air, and ...
Richard, I hear you.
I was always taught that mastb would lead to loss of sight, and it is punishable by God's Laws.

Medically mb is good for the reproductive system to function normally.
Not masturbating is noted for heightening the risk of various cancers, as the body finds it harder to release dead cells.

God doesnt give us these gifts, if by chance we cannot find normal pleasurable ways etc., that we should be told not to mb.
You have probably paid your penance a thousend fold, as the ancients say,

ste

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Whoever stole the Sun, put it back and we'll drop all the charges!

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#191649 - 11/16/07 07:20 PM Re: Masturbation and Spirituality [Re: reality2k4]
testingWaters Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 07/19/06
Posts: 508
This thread kind of disturbed me. I don't mean to offend, but I felt pretty far out of left-field in my own view on this.

Work, masturbating, drinking, doing drugs, invading other countries pre-emptively: all these things can become compulsive attempts to run from what hurts. But so can obsessing about not doing them.

I used to jerk off compulsively. Many times a day even. And I chose to stop for a while because I felt like I was so deadened that I didn't even know what really moved me sexually anymore. When I stopped, I started feeling like a sexual being again, ironically. And while that was frightening at first, it was very healthy too.

But, questions of faith aside, I cannot fathom how anyone could feel guilt about touching his or her own body. It just seems so violent that anyone external, any authority figure or institution, could actually come between oneself and their body.

To me at least.


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#191652 - 11/16/07 08:30 PM Re: Masturbation and Spirituality [Re: testingWaters]
Darren Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/12/07
Posts: 120
Loc: The High Seas
Anyone who is raised without religious indoctrination is likely not to understand the whole Catholic/ Christian guilt thing. I had to explain it to my partner when we first met because it was an odd phenomenon for him. He was not raised in any religion. He was astonished to find that there's this whole group of people that go through life carrying all this guilt around about various things. So you should count yourself lucky that you can't fathom all this guilt stuff.

_________________________
“Now and then we had a hope that if we lived and were good, God would permit us to be pirates” -Mark Twain

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#191660 - 11/16/07 10:07 PM Re: Masturbation and Spirituality [Re: Darren]
testingWaters Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 07/19/06
Posts: 508
Thanks for the thought Darren, I will take it to heart as you are very correct that trying to fathom the effects of a religious upbrining can be tough......


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#191678 - 11/17/07 06:25 AM Re: Masturbation and Spirituality [Re: testingWaters]
GateKPR4 Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 10/28/07
Posts: 955
Loc: North Carolina, USA
I have noticed that since I have opened up about about my abuse I no longer have a compulsive desire to masturbate like I did for so many years. I have not stopped but its not a blind drive to the porn site. I too had a Christian guilt factor working on me but the last time I masturbated was pure bliss, no porn no guilt no fantasy just me enjoying the feeling. This was the first time I experienced feeling good about giving pleasure to myself. It used to be always followed by guilt and shame. Now that I am no longer carrying around all my secrets of CSA the guilt and shame are are becoming less and less.
FYI: I have not gone blind..lol

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I'm a normal person dealing with abnormal experiences.
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