Newest Members
FredM88, Vermona, Jas52, oliviaavaxj, biboy24
12109 Registered Users
Today's Birthdays
-Matt- (39), kevin1963 (51), Northwoods (61), rcb0973 (58), sportinrucks (29)
Who's Online
6 registered (sentry, peroperic2009, petercorbett, 3 invisible), 57 Guests and 4 Spiders online.
Key: Admin, Global Mod, Mod
Forum Stats
12109 Members
73 Forums
62492 Topics
437999 Posts

Max Online: 418 @ 07/02/12 07:29 AM
Twitter
Topic Options
#188921 - 10/27/07 12:40 PM Question about crying?
saint-of-Lost-Causes Offline
Guest

Registered: 10/13/07
Posts: 57
Loc: Michigan
I have a problem...I am not exactly able to show emotions to the people I love like my family. Heres the problem...If confronted with an emotionally upsetting event or anything...where any normal person would cry right then and there or show at least some sort of emotion...I go silent. But then when im alone....and I think about it...I am not able to stop crying!

So My question is...Do any of you have trouble showing emotion or anything?

_________________________
We accept the love we think we deserve!

Top
#188929 - 10/27/07 01:58 PM Re: Question about crying? [Re: saint-of-Lost-Causes]
dgoods Offline
Guest

Registered: 10/15/07
Posts: 622
Loc: Richmond area
You betcha! For me i think it's a fairly quick assembly of various feelings. A long history of having the urge to cry at times when others would be totally mystified by it hasn't helped. I get "frozen" or numb at the time of the event, my brain's way of making sure i can physically do whatever is needed to respond to the situation, and to keep my reaction from negatively affecting the outcome. There's resentment (as in: "Great, yet another f--ing crisis kicking me to the back of the line again." and, of course, the old-school lessons of "I'll GIVE you something to cry about!", and "Real Men Don't Cry". All these things make it almost impossible to cry in front of others for me. i'll get there someday, but until then i'll just try to be more mindful of my inner life, and to shed the misconceptions as best i can. Think about crying like peeing- if you have the urge, but a long time passes before you have the chance, there's going to be a lot more of it than otherwise! I used to hate myself for feeling pathetic, wondering why when alone i'd often start sobbing uncontrollably. But when it hasn't felt safe for years to cry, or to let others see that you've been crying, this is what can happen. I get immediately uncomfortable when others, especially those i care about, start openly displaying strong emotion, whether it's affection, grief, anger, whatever. It's always too much to handle inwardly at the time; i often make a good show of being the calm steady rock, so that others won't take it as coldness, but inwardly it's usually a whole different story. Depending on the nature of the event, i can feel disassociated, angry, fearful, heartbroken, disgusted, or some combination of any of these. Hope this helps...

_________________________
Give sorrow words: the grief that does not speak
Whispers the o'er-fraught heart and bids it break.

-William Shakespeare, Macbeth, Act IV, Sc. III

Top
#188932 - 10/27/07 03:05 PM Re: Question about crying? [Re: dgoods]
KENKEN Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 09/25/07
Posts: 762
Loc: NOTHERN COLORADO
I really hear you. Know how you feel too. I have only been able to cry in front of my GF and of course when I am alone. I let all the emotions build up and then watch out. Think my job has alot to do with it. I am in sales so have to put on a "Happy Face" while I am working. The bad days come and go and that is when I would rather be alone all the time.
Thanks for sharing your problem with MS.

_________________________
I AM A GOOD PERSON, I AM A GOOD MAN

From the Movie: Antwone Fisher

***WOR ALUMNI SEQUOIA MARCH 2008***

Top
#188981 - 10/28/07 01:20 AM Re: Question about crying? [Re: KENKEN]
OKIE MIKE Offline
Member

Registered: 02/13/04
Posts: 978
Loc: HULBERT OK
I HAVE HAD A PROBLEM WITH SHOWING EMOTIONS FOR YEARS . I SEEM TO JUST BE NUMB MOST OF THE TIME .

_________________________
MICHAEL

"I HAD NO SHOES THEN I SAW A MAN THAT HAD NO FEET"

"All I can do is be me, whoever that is"

Top
#189006 - 10/28/07 04:33 PM Re: Question about crying? [Re: dgoods]
saint-of-Lost-Causes Offline
Guest

Registered: 10/13/07
Posts: 57
Loc: Michigan
I get immediately uncomfortable when others, especially those i care about, start openly displaying strong emotion, whether it's affection, grief, anger, whatever. It's always too much to handle inwardly at the time; i often make a good show of being the calm steady rock, so that others won't take it as coldness, but inwardly it's usually a whole different story. Depending on the nature of the event, i can feel disassociated, angry, fearful, heartbroken, disgusted, or some combination of any of these.

Thats exactly how it is...I couldn't of said it better! My family always joked with me about how I never cared or that I had so many walls to block my emotions. I want to be able to be open and honest in front of them but something blocks me.

_________________________
We accept the love we think we deserve!

Top
#189031 - 10/28/07 10:06 PM Re: Question about crying? [Re: saint-of-Lost-Causes]
dgoods Offline
Guest

Registered: 10/15/07
Posts: 622
Loc: Richmond area
Glad you could relate!
\:\)

_________________________
Give sorrow words: the grief that does not speak
Whispers the o'er-fraught heart and bids it break.

-William Shakespeare, Macbeth, Act IV, Sc. III

Top


Moderator:  ModTeam, TJ jeff 

I agree that my access and use of the MaleSurvivor discussion forums and chat room is subject to the terms of this Agreement. AND the sole discretion of MaleSurvivor.
I agree that my use of MaleSurvivor resources are AT-WILL, and that my posting privileges may be terminated at any time, and for any reason by MaleSurvivor.