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#187780 - 10/18/07 10:39 AM
Re: Drop the Corpse
[Re: mogigo]
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Member
MaleSurvivor
Registered: 04/02/07
Posts: 2472
Loc: Denver, CO
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You have to love semantics, and how a word that works for one might have a completely different connotation to another. For me, "acceptance" is something I could never do. At least, not at this point in my recovery. I guess what matters the most is we find what we need to heal, and progress at a rate that is beneficial for us. I like this thread  M
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#187798 - 10/18/07 12:29 PM
Re: Drop the Corpse
[Re: Hauser]
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Member
MaleSurvivor
Registered: 03/15/07
Posts: 1377
Loc: Eh?
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Where I once said "Forgiveness is overrated" when asked if I ever planned to forgive my abuser, I now think my mind has come to realize it does need to forgive. Like Mark said, it has something to do with inside me, for me. It has nothing to do with the person you're forgiving.
I'm not ready for it yet; but I do think it is something I'll considering more as time passes and as I continue on this journey.
Johnoarc, thanks for sharing this post on your thoughts. It is clearly a hot issue here and I think it's different for everyone. I was raised in a Christian home and part of my growing up was learning about forgiveness and its importance. As I said I had previously decided I would never forgive the abuser but... things have changed now. I'm finding myself pulled in that direction despite not wanting to go there. I think because of how I was raised, I'll need to forgive to find a new level of freedom from this.
Cheers,
~Brian
_________________________
I farted so huge, my ass exploded. There was poo everywhere and it got into the fan too. What a fucking mess.
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#187802 - 10/18/07 12:42 PM
Re: Drop the Corpse
[Re: frost]
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Member
MaleSurvivor
Registered: 08/01/07
Posts: 1526
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Forgiveness is never something that a person can just cognitively do. It is a process that has to be worked through.
Bryan
_________________________
Revenge is nothing more than another way of perpetuating abuse.
What the world needs now
Is some new words of wisdom
Like la la la la la la la la la.
-David Lowery
Having a friend who will keep a secret for you is worthless compared to a friend who won't keep a secret from you.
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#187803 - 10/18/07 12:44 PM
Re: Drop the Corpse
[Re: BJK]
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Member
MaleSurvivor
Registered: 03/15/07
Posts: 1377
Loc: Eh?
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Forgiveness is never something that a person can just cognitively do. It is a process that has to be worked through. A great point Bryan... So true.
_________________________
I farted so huge, my ass exploded. There was poo everywhere and it got into the fan too. What a fucking mess.
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#187805 - 10/18/07 12:45 PM
Re: Drop the Corpse
[Re: Hauser]
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Member
MaleSurvivor
Registered: 08/01/07
Posts: 1526
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Forgiveness came easy for me John, didn't help worth a shit though. I don't mean to pick on you Alan, but I don't believe you've forgiven anyone. I don't think you've even worked out the reasons why you need to forive Kim, and I know for a fact that you haven't forgiven your parents. Bryan
_________________________
Revenge is nothing more than another way of perpetuating abuse.
What the world needs now
Is some new words of wisdom
Like la la la la la la la la la.
-David Lowery
Having a friend who will keep a secret for you is worthless compared to a friend who won't keep a secret from you.
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#187810 - 10/18/07 01:11 PM
Re: Drop the Corpse
[Re: buzz_key]
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Member
MaleSurvivor
Registered: 08/01/07
Posts: 1526
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Alan and I talk a lot in chat. He's been kind of a life saver for me, so I hope he doesn't think I'm being too harsh...
Bryan
_________________________
Revenge is nothing more than another way of perpetuating abuse.
What the world needs now
Is some new words of wisdom
Like la la la la la la la la la.
-David Lowery
Having a friend who will keep a secret for you is worthless compared to a friend who won't keep a secret from you.
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