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#187696 - 10/17/07 09:54 PM Marijuana
theatrekid Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 06/03/07
Posts: 702
Loc: oregon
ok before i post this i want to make it clear that i am NOT some pot head kid.

however over the summer i tried pot several times and once a few weeks ago.

I really enjoyed it i was able to relax a little bit more than usual i didnt flinch when people touched me, i was calm, i just felt good.

I know its not a good idea to use drugs to try and fix our problems and im not. but is it wrong for me to do it so long as im not using it as a cure for my problems?

the reason i ask is because i told a friend who i am very close to but she is very conservative in her beliefs and she flipped out she was really disappointed in me. i didnt see it as being that big of a deal and was planning on doing it again. now im not sure. how serious is it?

again i want to stress that i know its side effects i have heard all the statistics about it so i know its not healthy.

I also understand the legal issues with it

but in reality am i really doing any life threatening harm or is this ok for me to do every once in a while?



Edited by theatrekid (10/21/07 04:59 PM)

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#187697 - 10/17/07 10:10 PM Re: Marijuana [Re: theatrekid]
Hauser Offline
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Registered: 11/12/05
Posts: 2962
Loc: United States
As a former pot-smoker (20+ years) I would recommend avoiding it AND alcohol lest it hinder your ability to address your recovery issues. (you have unresolved CSA issues right?)

If a friend is judging you about it, well, that's another subject entirely. When it comes to that, you have to weigh the value of a friendship over the value of being able to alter your consciousness with a particular drug. I would take the friendship over the drug myself.

Marijuana served its purpose for me, but that time has passed. I'm also avoiding it so that my ever-so-delicate self image isn't hurt anymore by knowing that I'm relying on a chemical crutch in order to cope with life. So, YES I was ABUSING it, not just doing it once every great while.

There is a line that can be drawn between use and abuse with any drug, whether its legally/socially accepted or not, but honestly Chris, I would just avoid it. Its too easy to fall into a pattern of relying on it to feel better about yourself. And, as a good friend here at MS told me, feeling better about yourself is a FAR better feeling than any drug can deliver. I've not totally experienced this feeling that he described yet myself, but I believe him, and I'm going to stay away from marijuana until I AT LEAST like myself again.


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#187702 - 10/17/07 11:03 PM Re: Marijuana [Re: Hauser]
BJK Offline
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Registered: 08/02/07
Posts: 1526
Chris,

Marijuana was my addiction of choice, and it is something I really miss. I'm going to try to answer you as objectively as possible.

You need to be extremely careful as to why you are using it, and with what you stated in your message, I'm a little leery. Personally, I think any mind altering substance, including alcohol, should be approaced with extreme caution for anyone who is recovering from any kind of abuse.

You're going to do what you want to do, and it is entirely up to you to make a choice like this. However, keep in mind that the dissociative properties that exist with marijuana use don't stop when the buzz ends. Also, the lack of ambition that marijuana promotes can also be a serious detriment to recovery even without habitual use.

Let's just put it this way. If I thought it was okay for me to use marijuana every once in a while, I would. I know it's not okay for me, but you're going to have to make your own decision.

Bryan

_________________________
Revenge is nothing more than another way of perpetuating abuse.

What the world needs now
Is some new words of wisdom
Like la la la la la la la la la.
-David Lowery

Having a friend who will keep a secret for you is worthless compared to a friend who won't keep a secret from you.

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#187719 - 10/18/07 12:39 AM Re: Marijuana [Re: BJK]
dgoods Offline
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Registered: 10/15/07
Posts: 622
Loc: Richmond area
I've got to echo Bryan on this one- I went from "Hey, this is pretty cool" to demanding my dealer put my shit in a shoebox and send it in a cab @ 4:00 AM. It never got there, and my dealer (who was an old high school buddy) dropped me like a hot potato. It's not coke or heroin in that you become physically addicted; but i became totally psychologically dependent on it for a long, long time, and you really do lose motivation to do much with regular use. It made me much more emotionally fragile and paranoid in the long run...
We have enough problems. I regret very much having added to them by choosing the wrong coping methods. I'm not gung-ho anti-drug; there are people who can use marijuana occasionally, but they don't think about it all the time they don't have it, they see it as a indulgent luxury, not an essential part of getting through the day. I am NOT one of those people- the only reason i never got into harder stuff was it was too expensive and i knew i'd like it too much.
Not trying to be preachy, i just know what happened in my case; i would feel irresponsible if i read that post and didn't chime in. I grew to fall in love w/ "MJ", and she never returned the favor...

_________________________
Give sorrow words: the grief that does not speak
Whispers the o'er-fraught heart and bids it break.

-William Shakespeare, Macbeth, Act IV, Sc. III

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#187740 - 10/18/07 06:21 AM Re: Marijuana [Re: dgoods]
sabata Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 08/08/06
Posts: 1948
it starts ---so innocent----------thrying something new-----------then it takes over-------------any mind alterating thing -----------------------will hinder your healing-------------------give it time it will makes things worse------------- in your mind----------------------------thats what happened to me-----------------------------------


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#187769 - 10/18/07 10:29 AM Re: Marijuana [Re: sabata]
Jarrad Offline
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MaleSurvivor

Registered: 10/27/06
Posts: 1071
Loc: arizona
my feeling is that a lot of teens/20 year olds experiment with it. so you did. done. i wouldn't persue it further. if you arent using it "to relax" and "allow people to touch you" for once...which means you are using it to curb effects of the abuse, then i ask what ARE you using it for? here how i see the whole thing playing out... you smoke... you relax... you finally feel "normal" around people... you can't feel normal without it... you are able to have people touch you... leads to girlfriends... leads to sex.. so you think you cant do any of that without it. which means addiction. and addiction sucks.


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#187774 - 10/18/07 11:27 AM Re: Marijuana [Re: Jarrad]
BJK Offline
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Registered: 08/02/07
Posts: 1526
Chris,

Just an FYI...I'm not in the habit of judging people for decisions they make regarding stuff like this, especially survivors. If you ever want to have a frank discussion about this, just let me know (bjohn13 in chat).

I've made a lot of mistakes and bad choices in my life, but I don't really regard my decision to stay addicted to pot for 15 years as that much of a mistake. I did what I had to do to cope, and it kept me from acting out. Yes, those are 15 years that I want back, but at the same time, I wasn't ready to deal with what needed to be dealt with anyway. Therefore, what I try to concentrate on now is the fact that I am a recovering addict who did what I had to do to survive.

I would much rather you face your issues head on, but you also have to do what you have to do.

Bryan

_________________________
Revenge is nothing more than another way of perpetuating abuse.

What the world needs now
Is some new words of wisdom
Like la la la la la la la la la.
-David Lowery

Having a friend who will keep a secret for you is worthless compared to a friend who won't keep a secret from you.

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#187800 - 10/18/07 01:38 PM Re: Marijuana [Re: BJK]
dgoods Offline
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Registered: 10/15/07
Posts: 622
Loc: Richmond area
good point.
I'm not meaning to come across as judging anyone.
I see my old attempts to cope or ease the pain almost like
what happens to a ship at sea that's on fire, with nothing but seawater to put it out. Pumping seawater extinguishes the fire, but now the ship is starting to list (tip over) and is in danger of sinking, due to all the water it's taken on.
Maybe the fire might have burned my ship to cinders w/o the water; I'll never know.
I have to remember "there is no wasted time", really- we're ready when we're ready, and it can't be forced. At this point in my life, I can't be honest with myself and continue to do things which bury my feelings further, and always wear off. The boogeyman of my pain has infinite patience, and is always there waiting- he knows the party has to end sometime.
I admit I loved all the same effects described, the ability to relax, be touched w/o jumping a mile, etc.
For me, for now, i need to find a way to cope that doesn't fade and leave me back at square 1.
-just a suggestion: if nothing else, try to notice how eager or excited you feel at the idea of smoking weed or getting high, or how anxious or unhappy you would feel if there were no more weed ever as of tomorrow. This can be a good indicator of your potential for psychological dependency.
It's your life, I'm only words on a screen to you; you know your situation better than anyone. whatever choice you make, it helps to be honest w/ yourself about your motives before making it.

_________________________
Give sorrow words: the grief that does not speak
Whispers the o'er-fraught heart and bids it break.

-William Shakespeare, Macbeth, Act IV, Sc. III

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#187860 - 10/18/07 09:55 PM Re: Marijuana [Re: dgoods]
theatrekid Offline
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Registered: 06/03/07
Posts: 702
Loc: oregon
Thanks so much every one. I'm not sure if im going to continue to use it. its not like i use it all the time now but when i do i really enjoy it. I could deffenitly live with out it. i dont spend my day thinking i want to get high but i will admit the side effects are quite nice so i do find my self thinking about it every once in a while. but perhaps i should cool it at least for a little while until i am in a little more stable of a state of mind.

,Chris


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#187864 - 10/18/07 10:56 PM Re: Marijuana [Re: theatrekid]
dgoods Offline
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Registered: 10/15/07
Posts: 622
Loc: Richmond area
excellent idea Chris! I hope you're not just saying that, it's not as if pot will actually vanish from the face of the earth, you have the rest of your life to mess w/ it any more. Better to be on solid ground before playing w/ your brain...
Hey, I feel good about myself! cool...

_________________________
Give sorrow words: the grief that does not speak
Whispers the o'er-fraught heart and bids it break.

-William Shakespeare, Macbeth, Act IV, Sc. III

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#188335 - 10/22/07 04:37 AM Re: Marijuana [Re: BJK]
Muldoon Offline
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MaleSurvivor

Registered: 05/30/02
Posts: 1428
Loc: St Paul MN
Originally Posted By: BJK
Chris,

Personally, I think any mind altering substance, including alcohol, should be approaced with extreme caution for anyone who is recovering from any kind of abuse.

Also, the lack of ambition that marijuana promotes can also be a serious detriment to recovery even without habitual use.


As a user for 37 years I agree with what Bryan said. The lack of ambition has been a big issue for me. I have been working on stopping my use and the past few months have been good for me. I hid in the haze of smoke in order to not have to deal with the Sexual Abuse, that got me NO WHERE.

Tom

_________________________
Teach the Children to Never Hide in the Silence

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#188415 - 10/22/07 11:38 PM Re: Marijuana [Re: Muldoon]
theatrekid Offline
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MaleSurvivor

Registered: 06/03/07
Posts: 702
Loc: oregon
thanks Tom ive decided im not going to do it on a regular basis. the negatives i think might outweigh the positives.


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#193311 - 12/01/07 09:21 AM Re: Marijuana [Re: theatrekid]
alexey Offline
Moderator Emeritus
MaleSurvivor
Registered: 08/16/05
Posts: 1674
Loc: Moscow, Russia
Theatrekid,

Thanks for posting about your expeience.

I smoked lots of pot when in college and even in high school.

I decided to stop, though, after having realy hard times with physical and emotinal heatlh. I abused smoking pot.

I hope no one here will have similar experience, nd basically it is up to you to decide wheter or not smoke it.

Stop if you feel it spoils your relationships with other people.

Alexey

_________________________
(\__/)
(='.'=)
E[:]|||||[:]3
(")_(")
--------
When you feel all alone and unhappy, turn to you Inner Child and talk to Him.
You will see He can comfort you like nothing else!

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#193325 - 12/01/07 12:09 PM Re: Marijuana [Re: alexey]
roadrunner Offline
Administrator Emeritus
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 05/02/05
Posts: 22045
Loc: Carlisle, PA
Chris,

I am posting as someone who started with alcohol at age 13 and ended up with heroin and prostitution. I didn't stay in that dark place at the end for very long, but I paid a terrible price for escaping.

Lots of guys your age get stoned from time to time and I don't see anything wrong with that; alcohol is a lot more dangerous. The risk comes in when you start using weed to settle down, feel "normal" and so on. What that basically means is you are using it to numb out, and THAT's what leads to disaster: you're no longer doing it for fun, you "need" it.

It's just a hop, skip and a jump from "I'll just do this tonight so I can settle down", to "I can stop any time I want", to reliance on drugs just to function. Weed is not addictive, but when a survivor is using it to get through, that can lead to all kinds of bad shit, and if my experience is at all typical, what happens is that soon weed doesn't do it for you anymore - you need something stronger. And so on.

Another factor is that as you start getting involved with drugs that brings you into contact with the drug culture and people who are stuck in it. My experience was that such characters didn't give a damn about me; they were prepared to see me do all kinds of insane stuff just for a laugh. I got involved with them already feeling worthless, and hanging around them just made things worse.

You will do what you will do, and I hope you will feel able to continue talking about this regardless of what direction you go. We are here to help and offer ideas, but not to judge. I would just urge you to beware of the pitfalls.

Much love,
Larry

_________________________
Nobody living can ever stop me
As I go walking my freedom highway.
Nobody living can make me turn back:
This land was made for you and me.
(Woody Guthrie)

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#193345 - 12/01/07 02:26 PM Re: Marijuana [Re: roadrunner]
BJK Offline
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MaleSurvivor

Registered: 08/02/07
Posts: 1526
Originally Posted By: roadrunner
Weed is not addictive


this was a great message from Larry, but I have to throw in my two cents.

Weed is not physically addictive. That only means that a person can not get physically dependent on marijuana. A person will not experience withdrawls if he stops using it, and a person will not build up a tolerance to it over time.

However, anything can be psychologically addictive, and people who have been through abuse tend to be especially prone to those types of addictions. We tend to be compulsive in doing things that make us feel better in the short term, and marjijuana was just the ticket for me.

Weed was my drug of choice. It helped me to master my dissociation problems like no other drug could. It made me paranoid enough to not act out. It kept me in check, and it made me feel normal. Quitting it was very hard. I had a $500 a month marijuana habit. I am an addict, and those days are gone.

_________________________
Revenge is nothing more than another way of perpetuating abuse.

What the world needs now
Is some new words of wisdom
Like la la la la la la la la la.
-David Lowery

Having a friend who will keep a secret for you is worthless compared to a friend who won't keep a secret from you.

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#193680 - 12/03/07 10:21 PM Re: Marijuana [Re: Jarrad]
Lazarus Offline
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MaleSurvivor

Registered: 07/01/07
Posts: 851
Loc: Below the radar, USA
Originally Posted By: Jarrad
here how i see the whole thing playing out... you smoke... you relax... you finally feel "normal" around people... you can't feel normal without it... you are able to have people touch you... leads to girlfriends... leads to sex.. so you think you cant do any of that without it. which means addiction. and addiction sucks.


A lot of people have said just what Jarrad said, but he put it so well that I have to second him. I smoked pot for a lot of years, to feel 'normal'; to alter my state of mind so that I could do things a 'normal' person could do but which I could not because of the aftereffects of my CSA... and so I became dependant on pot to feel 'normal'. It didn't help my recovery at all, it just postponed it for a decade or so.

Just my two cents.

Lazarus

_________________________
"That which does not kill us, surely makes us stonger." - Neitsche

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#193684 - 12/03/07 11:21 PM Re: Marijuana [Re: Lazarus]
theatrekid Offline
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MaleSurvivor

Registered: 06/03/07
Posts: 702
Loc: oregon
Thanks guys.... i havnt smoked in a while i got rid of what i had left and got rid of my pipe.... its not that i dont ever plan on smoking again but i dont want to be dependent on it or anything else for that matter. I took my first drink when i was about 13 my older brothers would give it to me. at the time i thought they were really cool but now looking back on it i see them thinking it was ok only because they use alcohol themselves to cope with their issues or to feel "normal" i dont want that. i dont want to feel "normal" I want to Be Normal so thats why i have decided to not do that stuff any more.


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#193722 - 12/04/07 06:10 AM Re: Marijuana [Re: theatrekid]
roadrunner Offline
Administrator Emeritus
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 05/02/05
Posts: 22045
Loc: Carlisle, PA
Chris,

Originally Posted By: theatrekid
i dont want to feel "normal" I want to Be Normal so thats why i have decided to not do that stuff any more.


That's about as quotable as they come. Good for you. It's not so much the issue of marijuana itself, but the fact that you looked at the question and opted for the path that you think is good for YOU. Well done!

Much love,
Larry

_________________________
Nobody living can ever stop me
As I go walking my freedom highway.
Nobody living can make me turn back:
This land was made for you and me.
(Woody Guthrie)

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#194309 - 12/08/07 12:59 AM Re: Marijuana [Re: roadrunner]
Logan Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 04/05/03
Posts: 1205
Loc: NY
I heard that if people didn't use Marijuana, there would be a lot less cases of schizophrenia in this country. I don't know how true that is, but to me it suggests that the paranoia associated with it could be potentially permanent. Kind of like what Frost said that its dissociative effects last long after the buzz has ended.

I used weed when I was a kid at 14 -16, the it stopped working and started to make me paranoid, so I stopped using it.

Just from my experience, I used anything and everything that could get ahold of to deal with the depression and to help me forget or put me in a daze just to stop feeling anything. After abusing substances was gone I began taking extreme risks to deal with stuff. I guess an addiction can manifest it self in many ways.

Just make sure you are not using something for the wrong reason like abuse issues or depression. Just be careful and monitor your self. It is really easy to begin to rely on anything that promotes instant gratification.

my 2 cents anyway.

take care,
Logan

_________________________
"Terrible thing to live in Fear"-Shawshank Redemption
WOR Alumnus Hope Springs 2009
"Quite a thing to live in fear, this is what is means to be a slave"
-Blade Runner

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#194383 - 12/08/07 10:53 AM Re: Marijuana [Re: dgoods]
AndyJB2005 Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 11/14/06
Posts: 1242
Loc: Saint Paul, Minnesota
I think, like with anything, there is a line between abusing and using. I smoke sometimes, but very rarely. I don't think it hurts me any more than a cold one on a Saturday night. It's definitely no worse than hard liquor. But because it's illegal it gets this bad stigma. Thank you Barbara Bush.

I've never heard of a man beating his wife after a big bong load. Maybe beating a pizza to death, though. lol

Like I said, it's not an all or nothing thing to me. Yeah, there's some people (addicts, for example, or minors) that shouldn't use it, and situations that you shouldn't use it during (driving or work). But that doesn't cut out all of society. For adults, it should be their choice. I don't like the government dictating my personal life. >.<

Just my opinion.

_________________________
Life's disappointments are harder to take when you don't know any swear words. -- Calvin (Calvin and Hobbes)

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#286753 - 05/08/09 01:47 PM Re: Marijuana [Re: AndyJB2005]
Charlie24 Offline


Registered: 09/28/08
Posts: 562
I have to share with you guys what I have to say about this topic. Recently I've been having this itch to just try smoking pot and see what it is like. I already am easily entertained and laugh a lot so I figure I would be laughing up a storm after getting high. I don't know what it is about the appeal of it to me. I think a big part of it has to do with the fact that I've been a goody two shoes my whole life, always trying to do the right thing. Maybe its my desire to break out of that shell and just kick back. I honestly don't know how I would go about getting pot or how to approach someone and ask them if I can smoke with them. Just my thoughts. Recently though it has seemed to come into the news of legalizing marijuana which opens up a whole new can of worms.


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#286755 - 05/08/09 02:38 PM Re: Marijuana [Re: Charlie24]
theatrekid Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 06/03/07
Posts: 702
Loc: oregon
Ha! i don't remember starting this thread that was a long time ago.

i've very recently stopped smoking pot. I'm all for experimenting with drugs except for the truly nasty ones like heroin and meth. I don't think pot is anyworse than alcohol but like alcohol there is a dark side. first off your doing something illegal so you should read up on your rights so if you were to get caught you would know what to do, you should also really learn about pot its negatives and positives.

I finaly decided i needed to stop smoking because i was using it to get through the day to cope with the stress and pressure of day to day life and that is bad.

anyways light up or not its a decision you should make for yourself. since starting this thread I went ahead and kept smoking looking back I don't think I would change it but i'm glad i'm stopping now so that I don't end up a 40 year old stoner with a tie-die shirt and a collection of grateful dead vinyl. (not that there is anything wrong with the grateful dead.)

hope this helped you some.

Chris


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#289747 - 06/01/09 01:59 AM Re: Marijuana [Re: theatrekid]
Junyah Offline
Junior Member

Registered: 03/07/06
Posts: 52
Loc: Mississauga, Ont
what about marijuana for medical purposes?
personally I dont think it's a bad thing to smoke it. It definately has medicinal properties, safer then alcohol and alot of pre>
_________________________
"Everybody is a genius. But if you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree, it will live its whole life believing that it is stupid."
— Albert Einstein

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#289753 - 06/01/09 03:47 AM Re: Marijuana [Re: Junyah]
Trucker51 Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 05/20/08
Posts: 2826
Loc: Denver, CO
I have a close friend who basically has given-up a promising career and now lives in the worst part of town just so that he can be stoned all of the time. He has recently been approved for medical marijuana here because of his recently diagnosed bipolar disorder??? He has been a heavy pot smoker for 32 years now, and he has also used quite a bit of coke and crank, though not recently. In Colorado if you are a user of medical marijuana you can also apply for a grower's license. He has put a tremendous amount of effort into starting a legal grow operation in his apartment. So he will grow his own weed and make a little money on the side selling to other patients to supplement his disability income (if it is approved). Not too bad for a guy with a civil engineering degree Magna cum Laude and a Class-A CDL, eh??? Five years ago he was making $60K with a promising future.

My guess is that I smoked the evil weed everyday all day long to try to feel normal and control some of my other symptoms. I smoked it for 20 years, then gave it up for crack cocaine in 1991. When you are high all of the time everyone thinks that your behavior is your normal behavior. Basically I used drugs until I didn't need them anymore. Or until I got so paranoid that I couldn't use them anymore.

God I'm glad that I don't need illegal drugs anymore. I'm almost 10 years clean off of illegal drugs.

Mark

_________________________
"We stay here, we die here. We've got to keep moving". Trucker Mark



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#289789 - 06/01/09 10:36 AM Re: Marijuana [Re: Trucker51]
AndyJB2005 Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 11/14/06
Posts: 1242
Loc: Saint Paul, Minnesota
What's the difference between popping anti-depressants and whatever pre>
_________________________
Life's disappointments are harder to take when you don't know any swear words. -- Calvin (Calvin and Hobbes)

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#289852 - 06/01/09 05:12 PM Re: Marijuana [Re: AndyJB2005]
myboyhoodfears Offline


Registered: 03/13/09
Posts: 457
.



Edited by myboyhoodfears (08/31/09 11:58 AM)
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Post Nubilia Pheobus

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#313967 - 12/11/09 03:03 AM Re: Marijuana [Re: AndyJB2005]
JuniorT Offline


Registered: 12/11/09
Posts: 4
Loc: Ontario,Canada
well said Andy,
As a medical user, I'm all for it, regulated like alcohol and free for people to try legally without fear of jail.
Peace

_________________________
"I have not failed. I have just found 10,000 ways that won't work."

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#313968 - 12/11/09 03:04 AM Re: Marijuana [Re: JuniorT]
JuniorT Offline


Registered: 12/11/09
Posts: 4
Loc: Ontario,Canada
O and one can make a whole lot more then 60K a year selling pot on the side to other med users..lol..or so i hear..lol


_________________________
"I have not failed. I have just found 10,000 ways that won't work."

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#313972 - 12/11/09 03:57 AM Re: Marijuana [Re: JuniorT]
Trucker51 Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 05/20/08
Posts: 2826
Loc: Denver, CO
Yes, with medical marijuana Colorado has become a brave new world, where stoners with a little business savy can get into a still lucrative business. Unfortunately, the handwriting is already on the wall, as the number of medical marijuana dispensaries doubles every few weeks, and product prices are already starting to fall. My buddy has gone from growing for himself to growing for the whole neighborhood, though now there is another dispensary right across the street and another two blocks away, cutting into his profits. Another year of this and pot will cost less than it did 20 years ago!!! But for today he is doing better economically than he has in years.

There is already a recent backlash out of the local media here too, with alarmist story after story appearing on the evening news. A few weeks ago 2 different local TV stations sent undercover reporters in to try to get medical marijuana licenses and both were approved without any supporting documentation by just claiming to be suffering from generic pain. One of them saw the doctor for a whole 3 minutes, paid his $90 for his license, bought some pot from the doctor's office, and was back in the news van in 15 minutes flat!!! If anyone is familiar with Denver's upscale Cherry Creek Mall and shopping district, you will be happy to know that the 6th dispensary has just opened there, since 5 were obviously not enough. An increasing number of lawmakers and civic leaders are calling for the enactment of more stringent legislation to reign-in runaway behavior that they find offensive.

And through it all it has now been 18 & 1/2 years since I quit smoking grass and 10 years and 10 days since I quit smoking crack cocaine. Think how much money that I could make if I just got my medical license??? I just don't see any good coming out of such an action though.

Mark



_________________________
"We stay here, we die here. We've got to keep moving". Trucker Mark



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#314038 - 12/11/09 04:38 PM Re: Marijuana [Re: Trucker51]
AndyS87 Offline


Registered: 12/12/08
Posts: 302
Loc: sorry, but I don't say on the ...
Bottom line, it's got positives and negatives. I know a lot of people who smoke and they don't have any issues, and I know a lot that went off the deep end after they started toking all the time.

Me personally I smoked pot fairly heavily between 17 and 20. It was great fun in the beginning and I had some of the best times of my life, cause where I lived there wasn't fuck-all else to do and being stoned made it more entertaining, even if we still weren't doing anything. Eventually though I'd start having bad trips, anxiety would creep up on me, and then one day I just freaked out really really badly. What those bad trips started off was the need that I needed to go get help and have therapy, and after that really bad high I got that one time I went and got myself in to counseling. So you see, though it may not be great, I look for the silver linings, and the ghanj is very much a big part of what got me looking into the past.

That said, I gave up on smoking regularly. The last time I smoked was in August. Before that was in December. Both of those were social events, one kids graduation party and another friends acceptance into a university overseas for Japanese study. Before that, well I don't even know.


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#314045 - 12/11/09 05:56 PM Re: Marijuana [Re: theatrekid]
jls Offline


Registered: 03/06/09
Posts: 1142
Marijauna sometimes has the image of being a harmless drug, which I wouldn't say it is entirely. It depends on the person. For example, from my experience working with youth marijauna can be quite damaging if used to excess. A young and developing brain can be affected quite negatively by too much pot use. Same goes for people with psychotic disorders like schitzoprenia or bi polar. Marijuana is a hallucinigen and people who are already experiencing hearing and seeing things that aren't there don't need such symptoms to be amplified. However, if used in moderation for strictly recreational purposes, unless it is for a medical reason, I don't see marijuana as dangerous or harmful for the right thinking adult. As an adult I myself have smoked it casually for many years with no negative consequences. JS



Edited by jls (12/11/09 06:04 PM)
_________________________
Love is better than anger. Hope is better than fear. Optimism is better than despair. So let us be loving, hopeful and optimistic. And we’ll change the world.


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#314062 - 12/11/09 08:46 PM Re: Marijuana [Re: jls]
zb420 Offline


Registered: 08/16/09
Posts: 251
if it wasnt for weed i'dve put a bullet in my head already


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#314106 - 12/12/09 03:23 PM Re: Marijuana [Re: zb420]
jls Offline


Registered: 03/06/09
Posts: 1142
I should clarify that marjiuana use for non-medically prescribed purposes that are still health related is OK with me also. People like yourself may use it to relieve anxiety. I don't know if this is the case for you personally but I have known others who use it for this. Also, I've known a number of individuals who use marijuana to deliniate the negative effects of withdrawal from harder drugs, as well as from alcohol. In this way the use of marijuana is an improvement in their lives. Concerning the legal issues I'm of the opinion that possession and use of all drugs should be decriminalized. With pot it is just plain stupid to persecute otherwise law abiding citizens for using it. With harder drugs keeping it criminal only hurts those who are already hurting from the pain of addiction. I say stop policing the possession and use of drugs and instead spend that money on securing our borders and preventing the importation of narcotics, as well as on addiction treatment. JS

_________________________
Love is better than anger. Hope is better than fear. Optimism is better than despair. So let us be loving, hopeful and optimistic. And we’ll change the world.


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#314122 - 12/12/09 04:54 PM Re: Marijuana [Re: jls]
catfish86 Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 10/27/09
Posts: 820
Loc: Ohio
I used it as a teenager frequently but never really bought any of it. I just happened to be there when a joint was passed around. Since high school I have pretty much avoided it entirely. Just not much use for it.

_________________________
God grant me
The Serenity to accept the things I cannot change,
The Courage to change the things I can,
And the Wisdom to know the difference.

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#314137 - 12/12/09 07:18 PM Re: Marijuana [Re: catfish86]
jls Offline


Registered: 03/06/09
Posts: 1142
I used it casually as a teenager too. Like you said I mostly smoked it when it was passed around. I bought it once as a kid, and was busted, so since then I have been more careful. Today I smoke between one and two grams a week, always after work and in the safety of my own home. It doesn't interfere with my daily life so I don't see a problem with it. JS

_________________________
Love is better than anger. Hope is better than fear. Optimism is better than despair. So let us be loving, hopeful and optimistic. And we’ll change the world.


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#314189 - 12/13/09 12:43 AM Re: Marijuana [Re: jls]
LilacLouie Offline


Registered: 07/02/09
Posts: 359
Loc: Utah
I used it a few times when I was a kid. I'm not impressed.
But I have seen what pot use can do to people. I am far from impressed there, and even more against the use and legalization of it.


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#314195 - 12/13/09 01:11 AM Re: Marijuana [Re: LilacLouie]
sono Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 07/19/09
Posts: 1069
Love it.

s

_________________________
the family
the perp

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#314202 - 12/13/09 02:41 AM Re: Marijuana [Re: sono]
pbert53 Offline
Greeter Emeritus
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 10/26/09
Posts: 576
Loc: Washington, USA
Hello Brother,

My name is paul and I can only give you my experience.

I wont allow it in my life because it can become an addictive substance. I don't allow it in my life because I have an addictive personality. I don't allow it in my life because I am an alcoholic and I need to stay away from such substances.

Because of the alcohol problem I try to live a more healthy lifestyle. Because of the alcohol, I have cirrhosis of the liver and my GI Specialist said that if I smoke it, it will make my liver even more damaged.

I only offer my experience because I don't run anyone else's program. I don't look up or down on anyone who chooses to use it. Peace.

paul :-D

_________________________
If you cannot control what happens to you, you can control your attitude toward what happens to you, and in that, you will be mastering change rather than allowing it to master you.

~ adapted from: Sri Ram

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#314214 - 12/13/09 05:38 AM Re: Marijuana [Re: pbert53]
jbh8 Offline


Registered: 10/29/09
Posts: 94


Edited by jbh8 (02/20/13 03:52 PM)

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#314366 - 12/13/09 11:20 PM Re: Marijuana [Re: jbh8]
ericc Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 01/04/08
Posts: 1960
I started smoking weed in early 9th grade (I had a couple experiences in 3rd and 4th grade that sort of were smoking it but not really.) Needless to say early 9th grade was most likely not long after "it" happened. I'm sure it gave me an escape and helped my mind take care of the self-preserving act of repression. Through high-school I smoked whenever I could, all the time in many cases. My first year in college I could start to get the really good "kind bud" and used to get stoned out of my mind. But I was disciplined enough to not use until I did my homework and stayed away for a couple days around test time. I basically got straight A's my first year in college. I remembered "it" (along with some other things) after I broke the levee open my last day of my freshman year of college while tripping on LSD. I continued to use marijuana but honestly no longer like it because I became paranoid and it threw in my face the issues now remembered but could not control or for that matter didn't fully understand. It put my mind in hell. But I kept doing it because I felt it was "who I was". Silly, but true, and I suffered miserably while high. I finally got to the point where I knew I really didn't like it and I didn't need to try and fit into that culture. In fact I sort of have a disdain for the whole stoner culture and am not sure why it took so long for me to see what a dead-end street (for me) I was trying to pretend I still belonged to. To each his own, and I know of people who function as daily smokers. But it ain't for me and there is no need for me to partake for the sake of others.

Eric


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#314369 - 12/13/09 11:35 PM Re: Marijuana [Re: ericc]
DJsport Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/20/08
Posts: 1742
I LOVE IT..

I dont get addicted to it. I can go along time without it. My ex's never knew. I have smoked it on and off for about 35 years. I must say I am ashamed for some reason. HMMMM

Donnie.

_________________________
Live to your fullest potential

Never make someone a priority if your only an option

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#314378 - 12/14/09 12:06 AM Re: Marijuana [Re: DJsport]
jls Offline


Registered: 03/06/09
Posts: 1142
I can't emphasize enough that whether pot use or not depends on the person. Like you DJ I can take it or leave it. Truth is that if someone offered me cocaine it would probably be the same for me. I've done coke in the past, in powder form, and while I enjoyed the experience I can say that I doubt I'd become addicted to it as that kind of high doesn't resonate with my personality. Opiates, on the other hand, I better watch out. Having experienced Demoral a few times while hospitalized opiates are something I could fall in love with without looking back. JS

_________________________
Love is better than anger. Hope is better than fear. Optimism is better than despair. So let us be loving, hopeful and optimistic. And we’ll change the world.


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#314395 - 12/14/09 01:43 AM Re: Marijuana [Re: jls]
LilacLouie Offline


Registered: 07/02/09
Posts: 359
Loc: Utah
Here's some good videos.
http://www.notevenonce.com/View_Ads/tv/popupTV9.php

http://www.notevenonce.com/View_Ads/tv/popupTV12.php

http://www.notevenonce.com/View_Ads/tv/popupTV2.php

http://www.notevenonce.com/View_Ads/tv/popupTV8.php

http://www.notevenonce.com/View_Ads/tv/popupTV3.php

http://www.notevenonce.com/View_Ads/tv/popupTV7.php

When I watch these they nearly bring me to tears. This is the route my sister went. First it was smokes. Then beer, then hard booze, then pot, then....

Now she has I don't know how many diseases.



Edited by LilacLouie (12/14/09 01:43 AM)

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#314458 - 12/14/09 05:17 PM Re: Marijuana [Re: LilacLouie]
AndyS87 Offline


Registered: 12/12/08
Posts: 302
Loc: sorry, but I don't say on the ...
Yeah, personally speaking I've seen lots of kids who do nothing but smoke, and it seems the younger on they start using (with frequency) the more harm it does. I actually wrote a paper on it once. In kids who weren't developed yet (usually under 18)it had the ability to atrophy certain parts of the brain. While I achieved great grades for a year and a half while I was smoking, that was relatively light use. By my spring semester of freshman year of college I was using heavily cause I had nothing else to do and my grades dropped a bit, and once they dropped I was off it. It doesn't really work out with the martial arts thing for me either, although I did spend a lot of time honing technique when I was baked. The couple of times I got into scraps when I was high (never where I practiced mind you, that would be extremely disrespectful) I noticed that I was a lot more fluid because I was so much more relaxed. But all things come to an end, and I kinda just grew out of it.


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#314524 - 12/14/09 11:51 PM Re: Marijuana [Re: AndyS87]
LilacLouie Offline


Registered: 07/02/09
Posts: 359
Loc: Utah
AFAIC people that use pot (or any drug, really) are trying to run from reality. You simply can't do it. You may run out of weed once in a while, but reality will always be here.

I have yet to come to terms with my traumas, but I know what they are and I won't let "them" win by resorting to drugs.

The idea that pot is natural is no different that cocaine. It's natural, too. Pot is processed after cultivation. Cocaine comes from coca leaves. And....it's processed. To make....cocaine.

I watched what drugs did to my sister. Go watch those videos. AFAIC pot is no different.


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#314709 - 12/16/09 01:05 AM Re: Marijuana [Re: LilacLouie]
AndyJB2005 Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 11/14/06
Posts: 1242
Loc: Saint Paul, Minnesota
I think if someone gets addicted to drugs (or maybe anything), there's more issues in the background that need addressing, and add to the probability of becoming an addict. In that situation, you can't just blame the marijuana.

The same can be said about any vise -- or pre>


Edited by AndyJB2005 (12/16/09 01:07 AM)
Edit Reason: Typo correction
_________________________
Life's disappointments are harder to take when you don't know any swear words. -- Calvin (Calvin and Hobbes)

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#314716 - 12/16/09 02:12 AM Re: Marijuana [Re: AndyJB2005]
myboyhoodfears Offline


Registered: 03/13/09
Posts: 457
i totally agree andy,...i know many articulate and intelligent sucessful individuals who smoke pot either on occasion or regularly...however some people do become addicted to a very wide range of things, if its not pot its going to be something else, perhaps gambling, or shopping or food, or sex or any other number of things that we are not inclined to ban simply because there are people out there cant control themselves...maybe they should ban everything, that'll solve the problem eh?



Edited by myboyhoodfears (12/16/09 02:13 AM)
_________________________
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#314726 - 12/16/09 06:27 AM Re: Marijuana [Re: myboyhoodfears]
LilacLouie Offline


Registered: 07/02/09
Posts: 359
Loc: Utah
Good idea!

Not!

If you want to smoke pot, go smoke pot. I don't care. I never said that smoking pot ALWAYS leads people to other drugs. I only told what I have seen. And if you want to snort some coke, be my guest! Hell, you can snort a line from Denver to LA for all I care! Your life, your choice.


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#450569 - 10/18/13 02:50 PM Re: Marijuana [Re: theatrekid]
victor-victim Offline


Registered: 09/27/03
Posts: 3132
Loc: O Kanada
i started smoking MJ in 1974.
i was 13.
i can't quit.
i tried, several times.
when i stop, i can't control my temper.
i have managed to abstain for periods of a month or two, but not often.

as a juvenile delinquent street kid, i tried everything that was available at the time in my neighbourhood.
did not like alcohol so i did not drink.
loved lsd and mushrooms, but they were rare occasions.
tried various powders about a dozen times, and did not like it.
thank god there was no crystal meth or such.
basically i became a "stoner".

from 1979 to 1988 i was railroading and did NOT smoke before or during the job.
then a few joints after work and before bed.

as a professional musician between 1988 and 2005,
on performance days, i would purposely not smoke pot all day.
i would fuel up on coffee.
caffeine is my cocaine.
by that evening, i would hit the stage in peak agitation.
i was able to act out on stage as an angry punk rock frontman, and i got away with murder.
as soon as i finished the last song, i would smoke a joint.
i don't drink, so i would usually smoke several social joints over the next few hours.
that was my routine since about 1988.

ironically, my usage would drop drastically during tours.
in between gigs, it was more or less chronic, which meant a few joints per day, with a few days off here and there.

i stopped performing about 7 years ago.
without that emotion/energy channeling ritual, i have had some serious issues with inappropriate "performances".
self medication seems no longer sufficient to keep the lid on my old persona.
at long last i am truly dealing with my soul damage instead of packaging and exploiting it as a performance artist.

these past few years, as a event technician with constant safety concerns, i am back to my railroad routine. no smoking before or during work hours, coffee up. then calm down with a "cigarette" or three when i get home. never carry, never transport. no more social smoking. just me and my habit.

i heartily disagree with anyone who claims that marijuana is not addictive or harmful.
i believe it has hindered my healing.

it does the job. whenever i smoke, i forget.
i avoid. i evade. i escape.

you be the judge if these are good things.


am i still smoking?
yes.
is it working?
yes.

working on a spiritual substitute.
is it working?
yes.
_________________________
Victor|Victim

War
Love
Poetry

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#450583 - 10/18/13 07:16 PM Re: Marijuana [Re: victor-victim]
BraveFalcon Offline
Greeter
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/25/13
Posts: 1093
Loc: The ATL

Hi VV. Man, that is quite a testament. I agree that Mary J can be addictive and can be harmful but I still say alcohol is worse on both accounts over-all. (At least for most people.) Personally, I am way more addicted to alcohol. When I first started smoking weed at 17, I went crazy with it and was highly mentally addicted to it until I was about 21. Then, the more of an alcoholic I became, the less I cared about pot. I still smoke pot sometimes but normally only on the weekend and only when I've had a lot to drink. For some reason, if I don't get drunk first, pot can actually have the opposite effect on me that it has on most people and kind of makes me think too much. Because of this, if I get stoned without drinking first, I normally tend to freak out a little in my head. That said, I probably will be smoking tonight, once I'm good and sauced.

As an aside, I had a dream the other night that they legalized weed in Georgia and I was SO HAPPY! Sadly, that will probably never happen here. We'll probably be the last state to do something as sensible as legalize marijuana. If we ever do, there is going to be one big-ass party at my place! cool LOL! Peace,

Ken

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#451777 - 10/29/13 10:24 PM Re: Marijuana [Re: theatrekid]
Suwanee Offline
Greeter
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 10/30/12
Posts: 695
Loc: Southeast USA
I'll weigh in on this...

Like a lot of other people, I encountered MJ when I was younger. It was around in high school, but generally avoided it because the craze for testing athletes for drugs was starting (as if MJ is a"performance enhancing" in any way for a swimmer-M. Phelps aside).

In college, a friend of a friend was one of those guys who seemed to have all kinds of stuff---sinsemilla, hash, red oil...etc. and a host of delivery systems. He was marginally a student, but ran a lucrative side business. It was here that I sampled some resinous MJ from his private stash. The result was not what I expected after trying some "skunk weed" in high school.

I was relaxed, then tense and pretty paranoid for a time. My mind raced from thing to thing. It really kicked my ADD into ultra-high gear. I was all over the board and impulsive as hell. I didn't give a fuck what happened. I normally never let ANYbody else drive my 4-Runner, but I was in no shape to drive out to the Strip to go bar hopping. I just handed the keys over to a stranger and said, "To the bars, James.' I climbed in the back and trusted him even though he was just as baked.

Subsequent uses were just as unproductive. Honestly, the ADD was magnified so much that it just wasn't a nice experience. Like Ken, I believe that alcohol is more destructive, but the THC in high quality MJ is not to be trifled with either. But..neither is Adderall, Prozac, Paxil, Wellbutrin, Klonopin....and on and on. Ken, if it is ever legalized here...well, I'll cross that bridge when I get to it.

Will

_________________________
Cruel Summer
My Journal

-Signs and traces left in stone
Ruins of a past unknown-

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#455966 - 12/04/13 05:34 AM Re: Marijuana [Re: theatrekid]
KentuckyPoet Offline


Registered: 11/18/13
Posts: 39
Loc: Kentucky
Bear with me hear, I'm making a point...

I wrote a letter to all of three of Kentucky's senators about my CSA vs. the state of Kentucky raiding my home and every inch of my privacy because I was growing mj on my property. In response to me perpetrating a victimless crime over a substance made illegal with (in the classic definition of the word) propaganda, the state of Kentucky saw fit to send four men in two cars and a fucking helicopter over my house. They then went literally through every drawer, nook and cranny in my house. Then they charged me with a felony and compelled me to plead guilty with falsified evidence of hand-scales that weren't at my house. (This so I was sure to look like a dealer; to which my lawyer, an ex-state prosecutor, said to me, 'If they say they found scales then they found scales and there's nothing we can do about that.' Being an ex-state prosecutor I later deduced that he was on the other side of this at one point and knew that falsified evidence flew just fine in the Kentucky courts.) Then, after having all of my privacy invaded by these four fucking classic single-cell meathead organisms known as cops, I got asked about all of the porn and aberrant sexuality stuff in my house by a neighbor who had read about it in a now-defunct local "newspaper" that was just about crime. So, basically, these four fucking sack of shit meathead cop-bullies took my private life that they knew all about because they got to raid my house over a victimless crime made criminal with propaganda 70 years ago and they told it to some reporter. These "LAW" men, hafuckingha...

Now, compare that to when:

I called the Crimes Against Children Unit of this exact same police force, the Louisville-Metro P.D. I called the CACU a couple years after realizing my abuse and when I worked around to the point that getting justice became predominant in my thoughts. On April 26, 2007, with a whole lot of fucking psychological effort, I called the CACU and got... drum roll please... a fucking answering machine!!!!!!!! I left a message and waited and waited and waited... So, TWO WEEKS LATER, on March 9, 2007, when I had not heard back from them, I called the CACU again. I got a real live person this time! So I say, "Yeah, I called you all on the 26th last month and I haven't heard back and-" That's when the cunt on the phone cuts me off to YELL AT ME, "We get two thousand calls a month!" To say I was stunned would be to abuse that word. I was quite literally floored into utter submission. I found myself meekly agreeing to be forwarded to Lieutenant Jackassorsomething. So I was forwarded and the line rang and rang and rang and then... drum roll please... an answering machine picked up! I left my message and I'm still waiting for that call back.

When I wrote to Kentucky's three senators about the disparate experience of being a perpetrator of a victimless crime vs. being a victim of as heinous of a crime as there is short of murder, the only one who responded was Mitch McConnell with a rambling incoherent issue-dodging fatuity. The other two probably figured they'd have to come up some equally stupid rationalization and issue dodging crap and they just didn't respond. (Kind of like the Crimes Against Children Unit of the Louisville-Metro Police Department.)
So, until someone wants to stand in front of me and have the balls to say, "Hey, child sexual abuse is no big deal to me but smoking pot, well, I think I should get to raid your home, invade your privacy, expose your privacy to the public, take away your voting rights and saddle you with a $130,000 tax bill for that", then I say to anyone who has a problem with me smoking pot that they can go XXXX themselves.

Also, I should say that I nearly drank myself to death in my twenties with Jim Beam but I haven't had a drop of alcohol in over 11 years. Of course, I can drive to half a dozen places within a mile of my home and get as much alcohol as I like and drink as much as I like and "society" doesn't deem this as illegal: i.e. feel like a shameful outlaw who belongs in the shadows if not in handcuffs. (Until pot is legal, I don't even listen to the 'it makes me feel paranoid' comments. Yes, you're breaking the law! Of course, you feel paranoid.)

Finally, I want to say, if you decide I'm a pothead because I smoke pot, know this: I've written three novels, a play, and countless great poems. I'm the second most well-read person I know. I make gorgeous handmade furniture. I make handmade wooden cover books of my own design. I do leather work. I make beautiful canes with inlay and leather work from tree limbs. And I'm a damn good cook. I also eat really well and I am a whole five pounds heavier than when I graduated high school in 1988. (Almost to the letter, all of my life's problem can be linked to my CSA. Outside of the fallout/issues of my abuse, my life is pretty good.)

But, of course, do as you like and don't ever do anything because of what other's say/do. Don't smoke if you don't want to smoke. It doesn't make you cool or any of that BS. Like everything, look inside yourself for the answer to what is right/wrong for you and then trust yourself. Peace.
_________________________
The whole world changes in a single bloom- Me in a poem

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#460044 - 02/03/14 06:51 AM Re: Marijuana [Re: theatrekid]
victor-victim Offline


Registered: 09/27/03
Posts: 3132
Loc: O Kanada
have not smoked any mary jane this year (2014) so far.
just finished my 4th tobacco cigarette since new years eve.
i have only had 3 cups of coffee and one ounce of alcohol.
doing well.
could do better.

using exercise, prayer, fellowship and the following scripture to combat cravings
(which are surprisingly few and far between).

As a dog returneth to his vomit,
so a fool returneth to his folly.
Proverbs 26:11

_________________________
Victor|Victim

War
Love
Poetry

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