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#186744 - 10/12/07 03:51 PM overly sensitive?
MarkK Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 04/02/07
Posts: 2502
Loc: Denver, CO
ok, so i had my "initial intake" with a new T last night. we had interviewed on the phone and determined that last night was a good time to meet.

the meeting went really well (surprise) and he asked if i wanted to go ahead and start - have my first full session. YES! finally someone i connected with that had experience dealing with male survivors of CSA, dealing with my extreme anger/rage issues, etc etc etc. AND they have a sliding scale so i can afford it without insurance!

so as we're wrapping up (90 minutes later), he tells me (by the way) he's going to be out of town next week, so we can't meet for two weeks. well, the two week date puts it on my birthday - now that in itself isn't anything major except my family would really like to spend the full evening with me. (imagine that)

so two and a half weeks from now i'll get to continue.

and the more i sit here, the angrier i get. he knew what his schedule was like, shouldn't he have said he wouldn't be available for two weeks BEFORE WE FLIPPIN STARTED THIS?????

or am i overly sensitive? maybe i shouldn't feel rejected, used, and tossed aside again....

right now i dunno if i should go back in two and a half weeks or just give up on this whole stupid, useless idea of therapy.

m


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#186748 - 10/12/07 04:16 PM Re: overly sensitive? [Re: MarkK]
Hauser Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 11/12/05
Posts: 2962
Loc: United States
Use this time to take down ideas (presumably taken from this forum) and present the ideas to explore in further detail when he gets back.


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#186763 - 10/12/07 04:52 PM Re: overly sensitive? [Re: MarkK]
OICU812 Offline
Guest

Registered: 07/06/07
Posts: 48
Loc: US
Originally Posted By: MarkK
okright now i dunno if i should go back in two and a half weeks or just give up on this whole stupid, useless idea of therapy.

m


I don't think you should give up on the whole therapy thing.but I do think the therapist should have mentioned leaving for 2 weeks.I don't think he might anything by it though,he was probably just forgetful.


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#186764 - 10/12/07 04:56 PM Re: overly sensitive? [Re: OICU812]
EGL Offline
Moderator Emeritus
MaleSurvivor
Registered: 06/19/04
Posts: 7821
Hauser said exactly what I was thinking. Use the time to put some framework to what you want to work on.

_________________________
Eddie

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#186765 - 10/12/07 04:58 PM Re: overly sensitive? [Re: EGL]
trusty Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 05/14/07
Posts: 167
Loc: Indiana, USA
hey, mark,
maybe this extra wait is a test for you...i'd say i believe you can do the wait...you have a good impression with regards to finally connecting to someone...so hang in there and give it a try...

just my two cents...

and...happy b-day...coming up.

russ

_________________________
"To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment." - Ralph Waldo Emerson

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#186781 - 10/12/07 06:44 PM Re: overly sensitive? [Re: trusty]
MarkK Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 04/02/07
Posts: 2502
Loc: Denver, CO
so .... thus far we have 4 votes for "overly sensitive" ...


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#186784 - 10/12/07 06:54 PM Re: overly sensitive? [Re: MarkK]
EGL Offline
Moderator Emeritus
MaleSurvivor
Registered: 06/19/04
Posts: 7821
I wouldn't say "overly sensitive", since I think I would have thought the same thing you did when he said he'd be gone. But things being what they are, you can try to make the best of it and use the added time to the advantage of your healing by thinking about what you'd like to cover. I'm sure your T would probably appreciate that as well, since giving him a framework helps him to know where you're both heading.

_________________________
Eddie

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#186816 - 10/12/07 09:40 PM Re: overly sensitive? [Re: EGL]
MarkK Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 04/02/07
Posts: 2502
Loc: Denver, CO
dunno
everyone says "stick around" when i was gonna jump ship

sounds to me like i am overly something or other


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#186817 - 10/12/07 09:58 PM Re: overly sensitive? *DELETED* [Re: MarkK]
nicky Offline
Guest

Registered: 08/24/07
Posts: 261
Post deleted by nicky

_________________________
i like the rain cause no one knows im crying

a strong man is one who is able to control himself when he is angry
what is your definiton of control?

i lay awake another hour
just like the one before
the shadows play a game with my head
i can't take this anymore

http://youtube.com/watch?v=x4EOw8wPBN8




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#186818 - 10/12/07 10:00 PM Re: overly sensitive? [Re: nicky]
MarkK Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 04/02/07
Posts: 2502
Loc: Denver, CO
uh ....

no


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#186821 - 10/12/07 10:04 PM Re: overly sensitive? [Re: MarkK]
EGL Offline
Moderator Emeritus
MaleSurvivor
Registered: 06/19/04
Posts: 7821
Overly nice and compassionate? \:\)

_________________________
Eddie

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#186822 - 10/12/07 10:05 PM Re: overly sensitive? [Re: EGL]
MarkK Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 04/02/07
Posts: 2502
Loc: Denver, CO
ok - so now we're just settling for sarcasm?


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#186823 - 10/12/07 10:05 PM Re: overly sensitive? *DELETED* [Re: EGL]
nicky Offline
Guest

Registered: 08/24/07
Posts: 261
Post deleted by nicky

_________________________
i like the rain cause no one knows im crying

a strong man is one who is able to control himself when he is angry
what is your definiton of control?

i lay awake another hour
just like the one before
the shadows play a game with my head
i can't take this anymore

http://youtube.com/watch?v=x4EOw8wPBN8




Top
#186824 - 10/12/07 10:06 PM Re: overly sensitive? [Re: MarkK]
EGL Offline
Moderator Emeritus
MaleSurvivor
Registered: 06/19/04
Posts: 7821
Originally Posted By: MarkK
ok - so now we're just settling for sarcasm?


Nope, just what I've observed about you.

_________________________
Eddie

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#186825 - 10/12/07 10:07 PM Re: overly sensitive? [Re: nicky]
MarkK Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 04/02/07
Posts: 2502
Loc: Denver, CO
ok ok
forgive me for speaking

you win


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#186828 - 10/12/07 10:08 PM Re: overly sensitive? *DELETED* [Re: MarkK]
nicky Offline
Guest

Registered: 08/24/07
Posts: 261
Post deleted by nicky

_________________________
i like the rain cause no one knows im crying

a strong man is one who is able to control himself when he is angry
what is your definiton of control?

i lay awake another hour
just like the one before
the shadows play a game with my head
i can't take this anymore

http://youtube.com/watch?v=x4EOw8wPBN8




Top
#186830 - 10/12/07 10:17 PM Re: overly sensitive? [Re: nicky]
MarkK Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 04/02/07
Posts: 2502
Loc: Denver, CO
i'm glad my losing came to good use
...
who says no one benefits when you give up??


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#186873 - 10/13/07 04:12 AM Re: overly sensitive? *DELETED* [Re: MarkK]
nicky Offline
Guest

Registered: 08/24/07
Posts: 261
Post deleted by nicky

_________________________
i like the rain cause no one knows im crying

a strong man is one who is able to control himself when he is angry
what is your definiton of control?

i lay awake another hour
just like the one before
the shadows play a game with my head
i can't take this anymore

http://youtube.com/watch?v=x4EOw8wPBN8




Top
#186877 - 10/13/07 05:05 AM Re: overly sensitive? [Re: nicky]
frost Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 03/15/07
Posts: 1377
Loc: Eh?
mark, trying to be serious here... i don't think you're overly sensitive at all. I think i'd be just as bothered by that myself.

what it boils down to is managing expectations. he shouldn't have waited for your initial assessment for 2.5 weeks, he did the right thing by getting you coming in as soon as possible.

his error lies in how he handled your expectations. he should've let you know right off the bat when you setup yesterday's appointment that he'd be gone for a week and checked if it was okay with you to schedule the next one (if there is a next one) for a few weeks later.

Instead, he slipped it into the end of a 90 minute session and consequently has caused you to question the entire process.

this doesn't mean he's not a good therapist, but it does mean that he didn't get a chance to learn all of the intricate things about customer service prior to becoming a therapist.

I think a good suggestion was made that you could pass the time by coming up with a bit of a game plan for your self. perhaps set some personal goals, and take the time to just figure out what you want out of the therapy.

It all sounded fairly positive up until that last bit, so I wouldn't let that stand in your way of a potentially good experience for you.

Wishing you all the best,
~Brian

_________________________
I farted so huge, my ass exploded. There was poo everywhere and it got into the fan too. What a fucking mess.

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#186881 - 10/13/07 07:41 AM Re: overly sensitive? *DELETED* [Re: MarkK]
ttoon Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 06/19/07
Posts: 977
Post deleted by ttoon

_________________________
checkin out for a few weeks... whistle
02/07/09

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#186902 - 10/13/07 10:36 AM Re: overly sensitive? [Re: ttoon]
MarkK Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 04/02/07
Posts: 2502
Loc: Denver, CO
Originally Posted By: nicky
thanks for humoring me and leting me feel like a winner
anything for a friend, Nick

Originally Posted By: frost
this doesn't mean he's not a good therapist, but it does mean that he didn't get a chance to learn all of the intricate things about customer service prior to becoming a therapist
ok Brian, you have a valid observation. and it was a good session...

Originally Posted By: ttoon
...it is simply that you have reached that saturation point...this far, no further
Thanks, Dave. You may be on to something here.

thanx to all of you. i still think it says i'm overly sensitive... maybe shouldn't give up on therapy - though i dunno how much good this guy's gonna do for me.


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