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#181549 - 09/21/07 09:31 AM
This is just too hard...
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Member
MaleSurvivor
Registered: 05/14/07
Posts: 167
Loc: Indiana, USA
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Some days I can coast along...
...but MOST lately are just too hard...
...to get out of bed...
...to have a "normal, relaxed" conversation with my wife...
...to pretend to be okay at work...
...to want to go teach my classes...
...to truthfully answer the question "how are you doing?"...
...to not cry when i hear almost any music...
...to not feel numb all the time...
...to just fucking hurt so much inside...
I can't wait for the Hope Springs weekend.
Russ
_________________________
"To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment." - Ralph Waldo Emerson
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#181551 - 09/21/07 09:34 AM
Re: This is just too hard...
[Re: trusty]
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Guest
Registered: 07/11/07
Posts: 412
Loc: Texas, USA
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Russ -
Just a (((((Russ))))) for you.
_________________________
I bid you Peace.
Kelly
The time is always NOW. Breath In. Breath Out. Move On.
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#181611 - 09/21/07 01:34 PM
Re: This is just too hard...
[Re: kellygtx]
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Member
MaleSurvivor
Registered: 08/22/05
Posts: 3069
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Russ,
I can totally relate. I'm in the same place right now... I wish I could go to Hope Springs, but I can't afford it.
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#181620 - 09/21/07 02:33 PM
Re: This is just too hard...
[Re: MarkK]
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Member
MaleSurvivor
Registered: 08/22/05
Posts: 3069
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#181631 - 09/21/07 05:58 PM
Re: This is just too hard...
[Re: Dewey2k]
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Member
MaleSurvivor
Registered: 08/01/07
Posts: 1526
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Russ,
I had one of those days today as well, but just because we're getting better at handling them doesn't mean that they get any easier, right?
I've learned to take these days as victories. If I wake in the morning without the desire to face the day, I remind myself at the end of the day that I did it.
Just know that you have my love and respect.
Bryan
_________________________
Revenge is nothing more than another way of perpetuating abuse.
What the world needs now
Is some new words of wisdom
Like la la la la la la la la la.
-David Lowery
Having a friend who will keep a secret for you is worthless compared to a friend who won't keep a secret from you.
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#181800 - 09/22/07 08:22 PM
Re: This is just too hard...
[Re: BJK]
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Member
MaleSurvivor
Registered: 05/14/07
Posts: 167
Loc: Indiana, USA
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Hey, Bryan,
Thanks. You're right...at least I'm not running away from everything any more...I am hanging in for the fight...even when I know I can't win...winning isn't everything. Just getting out of bed has to be good enough some days.
Honestly, I'm a little embarrassed with my post...tried to delete it but it was too late. I'll make it some how...thanks to support from people like you and Dewey and Kelly.
Good luck to you, too...hang tough.
Russ
_________________________
"To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment." - Ralph Waldo Emerson
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#181840 - 09/23/07 07:31 AM
Re: This is just too hard...
[Re: sabata]
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Member
MaleSurvivor
Registered: 10/09/05
Posts: 89
Loc: Denver, Colorado
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It sounds like things are hard for you right now. We're here if you need us.
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#181852 - 09/23/07 08:23 AM
Re: This is just too hard...
[Re: trusty]
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Member
MaleSurvivor
Registered: 08/01/07
Posts: 1526
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It's easy to be embarassed by posts like these, especially later when you don't feel like you felt when you posted it anymore.
It's all good, though. No need to be embarassed.
Bryan
_________________________
Revenge is nothing more than another way of perpetuating abuse.
What the world needs now
Is some new words of wisdom
Like la la la la la la la la la.
-David Lowery
Having a friend who will keep a secret for you is worthless compared to a friend who won't keep a secret from you.
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