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#174717 - 08/21/07 03:50 PM Dear Mr. Rapist 1 and 2 **triggers**
user2007 Offline
Guest

Registered: 08/13/07
Posts: 346
.



Edited by user2007 (04/24/11 12:19 AM)
_________________________
"Yes, I'm grounded
Got my wings clipped
I'm surrounded by
All this pavement"

~ John Mayer



Top
#174744 - 08/21/07 05:17 PM Re: Dear Mr. Rapist 1 and 2 **triggers** [Re: user2007]
roadrunner Offline
Administrator Emeritus
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 05/02/05
Posts: 22045
Loc: Carlisle, PA
Julian,

I'm glad you're letting out how you feel. One of the most important things we have to do is learn to reclaim our voice and USE it. We need to tell what happened, proclaim our innocence, and reject all the blame for what happened.

I like the way you put this:

Originally Posted By: J_McCormick
I will no longer dance to your tune, only mine.


Good for you!

Much love,
Larry

_________________________
Nobody living can ever stop me
As I go walking my freedom highway.
Nobody living can make me turn back:
This land was made for you and me.
(Woody Guthrie)

Top
#174855 - 08/22/07 12:40 AM Re: Dear Mr. Rapist 1 and 2 **triggers** [Re: roadrunner]
user2007 Offline
Guest

Registered: 08/13/07
Posts: 346
.



Edited by user2007 (04/24/11 12:19 AM)
_________________________
"Yes, I'm grounded
Got my wings clipped
I'm surrounded by
All this pavement"

~ John Mayer



Top
#174883 - 08/22/07 06:16 AM Re: Dear Mr. Rapist 1 and 2 **triggers** [Re: user2007]
roadrunner Offline
Administrator Emeritus
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 05/02/05
Posts: 22045
Loc: Carlisle, PA
Julian,

No one can deny your right to be angry, and for the moment it's good to let it out. If we don't find ways to express our anger then it will just burst out later on in ways that can harm us.

You're not a fucking little piece of shit, by the way. You're a teenager who has every right in the world to be respected and supported as you make your transition to adulthood. Abusers don't know a thing about that, of course, but we know about it here. I hope you will continue to talk about things and ask for whatever help you need.

Much love,
Larry

_________________________
Nobody living can ever stop me
As I go walking my freedom highway.
Nobody living can make me turn back:
This land was made for you and me.
(Woody Guthrie)

Top
#175068 - 08/22/07 05:05 PM Re: Dear Mr. Rapist 1 and 2 **triggers** [Re: roadrunner]
user2007 Offline
Guest

Registered: 08/13/07
Posts: 346
Thanks, Larry.
Today I woke up about 6pm. Didnt study, didnt do a thing. It seems as if I completely lost the ability to feel anything. The rage is gone and any other kind of feeling has gone along with it.
My mind seems clearer than ever. Now I can see how many times I was abused in many other ways my whole life. Not sexually but mainly emotionaly by parents, cousins, "friends". By a father that believes that he makes me a fearless man locking me into a dark room. "Loneliness makes people stronger", he says. Unfortunately he's wrong. That put me in the edge of insanity. People think that words lack of power, but sometimes they hurt much more than a punch.

_________________________
"Yes, I'm grounded
Got my wings clipped
I'm surrounded by
All this pavement"

~ John Mayer



Top
#175071 - 08/22/07 05:16 PM Re: Dear Mr. Rapist 1 and 2 **triggers** [Re: user2007]
roadrunner Offline
Administrator Emeritus
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 05/02/05
Posts: 22045
Loc: Carlisle, PA
Julian,

You're so right: words can do as much harm as physical violence, and sometimes even more. Emotional abuse can make a guy feel he's worthless and unwanted, and when that begins to happen one way he copes is to close down emotionally. That is, he learns how to stop feeling things - everything.

That's no way to live, of course, but it takes time to relearn how to feel and how to trust your feelings - what to do about them when you feel again.

Much love,
Larry

_________________________
Nobody living can ever stop me
As I go walking my freedom highway.
Nobody living can make me turn back:
This land was made for you and me.
(Woody Guthrie)

Top


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