Where was GOD? Why did this happen?
by Sallie Culbreth

http://www.committedtofreedom.org/why.pdf

I think thats complicated question. I've done alot of thinking and reading. And personally I have come to the conclusion that "god" has nothing to do with. I do believe that there is something beyound ourselves, however I don't believe that god steps in and saves people. There are defiantely instances that could take on a divine like quality in an individuals life. I feel bad things happen and they are not right but we have to do our best to put everything back together.

Actually I was just thinking I replied to this but maybe this was just meant as a statement. If it was I'm sorry.

Chris,

Did the article help explain some questions you may have had?

It helped me some, BUT I still have many, many questions...
for GOD...

Frog, Christopher,

Here is the answer I came up with in April 2006:

http://www.malesurvivor.org/board/ubbthr...=true#Post16901

For the sake of context, let me say that I was working on this issue about 5 months after I disclosed to my parents and 4 months after I began therapy in English (previously it had been in German in Hamburg, where I teach).

Much love,
Larry

Is FROG "Fully relying on God?"

I have some very serious questions for GOD...
I cannot speak w/ HIM at this time...
I have a serious problem w/ a GOD who will sit
idle while I was being raped and molested...
Because of "CHOICE"...? FUCK that...where was my choice?
And I'm supposed to fully rely and trust HIM to know
whats best for me...?

you just gotta believe frog ! even though all the facts say otherwise you just gotta believe!even though god lets us down at ever turn you just gotta believe!why ?i dont have a clue. gotta believe that god had a good reason for what happened to us but we are just not pure enough to have that reason explained to us.
and there are>

wow...I've thought that way for some time now...I was a very
hard working christian once upon a time...now I have a ton
of questions for GOD that I want answers to...

Below is a daily inspiration from Joel Osteen that I received today:


Yet the LORD longs to be gracious to you; He rises to show you compassion. For the LORD is a God of justice. Blessed are all who wait for Him! (Isaiah 30:18 NIV)”.

Today's Word from Joel and Victoria

Sometimes, unfair things happen. A relationship doesn't work out, or a friend betrays us. Maybe you worked really hard, but you didn't get the position you deserved. Life is not always fair. The good news is that even though life is not always fair, we serve a God who is fair. He is a God of justice. He sees every wrong that's ever been done to you. He sees every person that's ever hurt you, every unfair situation. If you will stay in faith and not get bitter, God has promised He will pay you back for every injustice that's ever been done to you. He said He would take what was meant for your harm, and He'll turn it around and use it to your advantage. And the great thing about God is if you keep the right attitude, if you'll wait for Him, He'll not only bring you out, He'll bring you out better off than you were before! God wants to make the enemy pay for bringing that trouble into your life. Be encouraged today that God is for you! He is working behind the scenes on your behalf. Praise Him and thank Him for showing His justice in your life today!

I am not a religious person. But if one asks where is g-d in the protection of the innocent - then where has He been during so many of the evil things man does to man? The Holocaust? Wars? Famine? G-d driven disasters? Why does a tornado take one family and spare the ones next door? They usually say "G-d was looking out for us." Does that mean he said, "Fuck off" to the people who did die?

I don't think - if there is an actual g-d - that it works like that. I have been reading in the paper in my town (OKC)recently about all these kids who have died at the hands of their parents or boyfriends of parents - kids that were given BACK to their families by judges - and who were again abused and finally killed. Where was g-d then? Where was their protector?

It just doesn's work that way. What we should hope for in the future - is that man (the village) will help protect its children - often from their own parents - sometimes from strangers - sometimes by other family members. Its been going on since the beginning of mankind. It happens in the animal kingdom. A friend of mine had a dachshund who had puppies. He left after the puupies weer born to go to the store. When he returned there were no puppies to be seen. The mommy had eaten everyone of them. Talk about post-partum depression! So its not just us humans.

After i was raped at 14 - and beaten quite badly - and cut by a knife they wielded - I wondered what I had done to deserve that. Had I been provacative? Had I "asked" for it? I didn't report it. I only told a girlfriend. I knew that I wouldn't be believed. I was a freak anyway - a radical - even at 14. So I knew it would only drag me down. I wasn't even sure my "Mother" would believe me.

Only in my 30'sa (I am in my 50's now) did I decide it was just one of those crappy things. I was wearing adress that went to me ankles. I was weariung underwear. I had been dancing but it was 60's dancing - not dirty dancing. When I went outside for a breath of fresh air, that was all I was doing. I didn't even see those guys until it was too late. two guys looking for an opportunity. I realized at 30 that I was simply an unfortunate victim of a very violent crime. Period. Doesn't make the haunting of me any easier - but it does relieve me of blame. I spent a lifetime blaming myself for not screaming, not fghting them, for going outsiude in the first place.....just like most of you guys who spend a lifetime of shame and blame...why us?

I was not protected by anyone. It just happens because bad shit happens to people. And bad shit happens because there are lots of very bad people.

I hope my assailants ended up with bad karma and they have in some way paid for what they did to me. I'll never know. Sometimes it doens't work that way either.

I just think its time for me (and my wonderful husband) to set aside the anguish and try to find some bits of happiness to hang on to. To go on and have a relartively good life. i wish the same for every victim in here. I wish for happiness for all of us.

Grace

thev only thing offensive about this post is me , i deleted my response cause it was stupid. sorry k?

There has always been and always will be a struggle of good and evil in the world. God has given all of us "free will" which means we can choose do be good or be evil. Unfortuantely many choose to be evil and do evil things.

By no means am I disregarding the evil horrible things that have happened to you and your husband Grace, you were both the victims of evil.

God does not promise us to be happy in our lives, he does promise to help us through the hard times if we believe in him. He does promise us to be happy when we go home to him.

Hi Shadowkid!!

I don't take your response as picking on - I understand being angry.

I won't say that I understand your anger - I don't have an ounce of understanding what you've been through. I do know the anger of losing my wonderful, loving and nurturing mother when I just turned 13. I understand being angry at God for taking her away, and being angry at my mom for leaving me. Add to that being in a Catholic school when she died and the priest giving me an hour long lecture during class confession that my mom was happier being in heaven - that given the choice she would choose to stay in heaven rather than being here with her husband and 6 children that meant everything to her. I still can't believe that I didn't blurt out for him to F himself because that's all I kept thinking during his "helpfull" lecture.

My faith is very private to me and I don't force my beliefs on anyone. I have come to thank God for all the good things in my life - my children, my family and friends etc. I stopped asking why God "lets" bad things happen to us and just started to ask him to help me through the bad things.

I hope I haven't offended you!!

Frog,

I didn't read the article that you posted until well after I put the daily inspiration from Joel Osteen. You come up with the best articles!!!! This is another one that I'm going to print out and send to my husband.

Thanks!

While it may not be the most popular opinion here, I have to agree with you Frog.

I to was raised as a Christian, and when I'm in trouble, I still find myself asking for his help, and then, I question why I do so.

What kind of God would allow such a thing. Fuck the free will crap.
What kind of God would take the mother away from young children?
What kind of God would allow a father to do such things to his own children?
What kind of plan would he have to have that can include such horrible things?

If this is his plan, I wish he would have left me out of it!!!
I didn't ask to be included in his grand scheme of things, he needs to develop a better plan if he wants me to remain on board!!!

Best wishes and warmest regards,
Scott

Hi Scott!

I totally respect your feelings. There are a few things that I can answer because it is in direct reference to what I said as to why I can understand anger.

It sucked huge to loose my mom, especially at the age that I truly needed her. It was an enormous empty hole in me for a long time. I was justified at being angry. The only thing that I can say about it is that it shaped me into the person that I am. It has made me strong as nails. My family did not fall apart, we pulled together and looked out for and cared for each other. We are to this day the closest family that I know. We are still there for each other and it means the world to me - especially now because of the trials that my sons and I are going through because of my husbands CSA. It also made me be a good mom to my sons and put them and their well being as first priority in life.

As for God having a plan for me and me trusting in Gods plan - that very simply means that today I find myself a 44 year old woman with a 14 year old and 11 year old son and my husband, their father has checked out. My plan in life was that my husband and I were going to grow old together, that isn't going to happen - we have become the victims of his CSA also. This was so devestating to me that I had to trust in Gods plan. I am a person that takes action and makes things all better, I can't make this all better - it's bigger than me, so I trust that God knows whats going to happen and what needs to happen. It is a genuine letting go and trusting God. It gives me peace in all of my husband's chaos.

Again, I don't know why such evil lives in our world, but I do know that there is alot of pure good in the world as well. I choose to be the best person that I can be and focus on the good in life - that's what I thank God for, all the good things that surround me, that is my "free will" that I choose for me.

I hope this doesn't sound preachy, that is not my intention. It has taken along time for me to get to the point that I'm at with my faith and I am grateful that I've gotten here, it gets me through what can be a pretty lousy life at times.

I wish you peace!

Shadowkid,

I don't find you offensive in the least bit!! I find you to be extremely honest and candid. I didn't think your response was stupid either, it's where your at in life - right now in your recovery. So absolutely no apology is needed.

I didn't feel that my beliefs were threatened by your response either, I'm very strong in my faith.

I've been drawn to this site since my husband and I seperated 3 months ago and have done alot of reading. Over and over I'm so struck by your responses to people, you have great insight and wisdom. You say exactly whats on your mind - sometimes brutally honest, but I admire honesty.

I have noticed that you participate in discussions about faith, and that while you are angry at God for what has happened to you, you really want to believe. God whispered to me for a long time before I really listened to what he was saying to me. He waited very patiently for me.

Sorry - here comes the preachy part - Listen to what God is whispering to you.

It's all very simple really, I waited for the voice of God to say "Angie I'm here". It never happened of course. It was a gradual realizing of how much God was working in my life every minute of the day. If I were to detail what I've had to deal with since I had my husband arrested 3 months ago, you'd be horrified. 2 years ago all of this would have put me on the edge of a nervous breakdown, today I deal with everything with God's help and I know that I'm not in this alone.

Anyway, I just wanted you to know that I think you rock!!!!!!

Angie

thanks,sometimes i talk before i think and i forget that everyone is not pissed off at the world like i am ,im really glad they are not . when you been taught, pretty much forced to lie a lot to survive being told your honest means a lot thanks k?

You won't always be mad at the world!!

It brings tears when I read of the number of people who have been told when bad happens, it was "in God's plan". God only had/has one plan - for us to live in peace with Him. It was there in the garden until evil screwed things up. Man's authority on earth was handed over. And we're still paying for it.

Fortunately, God's plan is still there, and it will win out eventually. Yes, there will be lots of bad things that happen to good people. And I'm sure lots of good things that happen to bad people. That's life on this corrupted planet. For now.

And yes - all this is my faith - my hopes - my beliefs. I just wanted a chance to respond.

M

Hi Mark!

I think Scott was referring to what I have at the bottom of my posts "God has a plan for me, I trust in God's plan" when he wrote that. I really can understand Scott's anger and his response, I was angry at God at one time and I think that's not an unusual response when traumatic things happen that we can't understand why it happened. It took alot of years of gaining wisdom for me to understand what I now understand.

Did you read the original article that Frog posted the link for?? It really touched on the question "Why did God let this happen" and I thought it was very well written.

I like your faith, your hopes and your beliefs - their mine as well!!!

Angie