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#172931 - 08/13/07 08:34 AM panic time
jessedawg Offline
Guest

Registered: 07/17/07
Posts: 345
Loc: New York
I have 14 days to study and get ready for the state exam which is a written and practical hands on exam in front of the state directors. Im freaking out. I know this stuff and Ive been doing this stuff but now that I have some time off to really look at it, oh my god and wtf. I have to pass a polygraph, get through an oral board interview, do the praticals like directional orientation, medial assessments, situational judgement and reasoning, lead a team and work on a team at a mock fire. I dont think all this panicing has any relation to the abuse except for the fact that I can hide it real good and "pretend" to have my shit together. or maybe its a good thing because Ive had to cope with way worse situations than this. I am not sure but Im pretty worked up about it. Other than the guys at my house I dont have anyone else to share it with, if and when I pass/graduate I mean. The guys will be happy about it but they'll give me a ton of shit and I know they'll bust my balls on everything for a while and thats ok, thats how it is, but I mean no one to be proud of me I guess is what Im trying to say. Okay so do I sound like an idiot complaining about things that dont matter? let me have it..

_________________________
Firefighters - your worst nightmare is just another day at the office.

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#172935 - 08/13/07 08:54 AM Re: panic time [Re: jessedawg]
roadrunner Offline
Administrator Emeritus
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 05/02/05
Posts: 22045
Loc: Carlisle, PA
Jesse,

Hey, I'm very proud of you already! And I bet others are as well. And yes, all this stuff you are worried about matters. And of course you should talk about it. That's something guys find difficult to do, but I find it always helps.

Yry to focus on your studies and let us know how things are going, okay? It will be a tough two weeks, but we will all be rooting for you. \:\)

Much love,
Larry

_________________________
Nobody living can ever stop me
As I go walking my freedom highway.
Nobody living can make me turn back:
This land was made for you and me.
(Woody Guthrie)

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#172939 - 08/13/07 09:01 AM Re: panic time [Re: roadrunner]
jessedawg Offline
Guest

Registered: 07/17/07
Posts: 345
Loc: New York
I so want to believe you

_________________________
Firefighters - your worst nightmare is just another day at the office.

Top
#172940 - 08/13/07 09:05 AM Re: panic time [Re: jessedawg]
hideout Offline
Guest

Registered: 08/09/07
Posts: 84
Loc: michigan
jessedawg, just take it easy and slow
relax:)


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#172941 - 08/13/07 09:09 AM Re: panic time [Re: hideout]
jessedawg Offline
Guest

Registered: 07/17/07
Posts: 345
Loc: New York
sure, thanks, any suggestions as to how I do that? relax? lol

_________________________
Firefighters - your worst nightmare is just another day at the office.

Top
#172942 - 08/13/07 09:10 AM Re: panic time [Re: jessedawg]
hideout Offline
Guest

Registered: 08/09/07
Posts: 84
Loc: michigan
none here
haha, just take things one at a time


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#172943 - 08/13/07 09:12 AM Re: panic time [Re: hideout]
MemoryVault Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 03/01/07
Posts: 693
Loc: NJ
Think of all the others...the ones who never had to "pretend to have their shit together" until now...the ones who've never been tested, and really don't know how they'll react under pressure. Keeping your head in tough situations is a test you've passed many times!

And we'll cheer and be proud when you pass this one!

David


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#172946 - 08/13/07 09:24 AM Re: panic time [Re: MemoryVault]
jessedawg Offline
Guest

Registered: 07/17/07
Posts: 345
Loc: New York
thanks david, I keep telling myself that but still a lot of doubt, I guess thats normal

_________________________
Firefighters - your worst nightmare is just another day at the office.

Top
#172948 - 08/13/07 09:26 AM Re: panic time [Re: jessedawg]
hideout Offline
Guest

Registered: 08/09/07
Posts: 84
Loc: michigan
it is normal, but you know you can do it


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#172949 - 08/13/07 09:32 AM Re: panic time [Re: jessedawg]
roadrunner Offline
Administrator Emeritus
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 05/02/05
Posts: 22045
Loc: Carlisle, PA
Jesse,

When I finished my Ph.D. dissertation at Princeton in April 1981 I was really pleased with what I had written. But as the weeks passed before my final oral defense my confidence just seeped away. The exam was in June, and a week beforehand I was thinking, well, I did do a lot of work...at least they will pass me won't they? My wife tried to cheer me up, but I really felt doomed!

And guess what? I sailed through the defense and the University awarded me their prize as the outstanding grad student for that year! \:D

So as you say, Jesse, doubt and worry are normal - just don't let them own you. Those feelings reflect only what you fear, not what you know.

Much love,
Larry

_________________________
Nobody living can ever stop me
As I go walking my freedom highway.
Nobody living can make me turn back:
This land was made for you and me.
(Woody Guthrie)

Top
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