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#170228 - 08/01/07 08:14 AM blindsided with a victory I think
easterneurope Offline
Guest

Registered: 07/11/07
Posts: 60
Loc: eastern europe
Out doing some shopping in the city today. We have really large discount / grocery stores here with malls wrapped around them. I go in a little newstand looking for a new English-version Newsweek. Pornography is everywhere, but almost exclusively naked women. Then, BOOM, there is a magazine there in front of me with 6 naked men on it showing all except their penises. I'm frozen. Panic. Fear. Lust. Confusion. A million thoughts. How can I open it and look and how come my feet won't run like HELL out of this store!! I flipped it open and saw a glimpse of a man and closed it and walked out. YEAH! Victory. I spent about 30 minutes walking around, pulling it together. But, I DID pull it together.

I didn't dive into the magazine and absorb it (like I wanted to do). I didn't duck into the bathroom to jack off (like i really wanted to). I didn't fall head first into some fantasy (like I wanted to). I remembered the reality of what is true. I asked God to sort my emotions (and He did) and to settle them (and He did). He reminded me that what happened in that store was not my moral failure. I wasn't looking for it. He told me "it's like a man from out of no where screamed at you, called you names and slapped you" and you're simply reeling and then, responding, from the surprize of it all. A man, ,many years ago, made that particular scream one I'd always recognize. It will always get my attention but it doesn't have to control me once it does have my attention.

I finished what I came to the mall to do. I still got on the subway and I still came home. Later, my daughter and I are watching a movie on TV like she wanted and I am a winner today. One day at a time.

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#170233 - 08/01/07 08:33 AM Re: blindsided with a victory I think [Re: easterneurope]
jaybee Offline
New Here

Registered: 07/31/07
Posts: 25
Loc: Florida
2 thumbs up!

_________________________
3+7+11+13+19+25+39/9-4 yep, were all somewhere...

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#170243 - 08/01/07 09:18 AM Re: blindsided with a victory I think [Re: jaybee]
Barney Offline


Registered: 07/31/06
Posts: 236
Loc: Southern Utah/Northern Arizon
A great post!!!!!! Shows it is possible to turn away from those things that are not good for us. Such a victory, thanks for sharing it with the rest of us.


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#170323 - 08/01/07 01:21 PM Re: blindsided with a victory I think [Re: Barney]
bp83 Offline
Member

Registered: 06/29/06
Posts: 111
Loc: Arkansas
that's great man...keep sticking to your guns!!!

_________________________
-
Scott

"Life is for living, we all know, and I don't want to live it alone..."-Chris Martin

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