can't stop the tears this morning. wife's off at work and son is at a boat show with one of his best friends, so i have the opportunity to exam my life. things i wanted to get done today too but all i can do is hug the stuffed puppy i got for Young Mark and hold on.

right now i'm not too crazy about recovery.

Mark, I'm so sorry...

I've been where you are and I know how bad it sucks. Don't beat yourself up. Right now you have the opportunity for a good cry. Go ahead and let it out. You deserve it, and you'll feel better afterwards, I promise.

I feel for you, buddy. I really do...

Mark,

The emotion wouldn't be there if it didn't need to come out. Let it flow. The stuffed animal is just the thing to hold onto when you need to cry for Little Mark.

Just know that you have brothers here who understand and support you in your healing journey.

Lots of love,

John

thanx guys, but the tears aren't there now. short shower i guess.
i feel floods flowing inside - but there's nothing on the outside but rock and stone.
so much pain. not physical pain so much, tho i'm having some symptoms that seem to relate back.

i guess i just don't know how to "let it out" or "let it flow". i've cried before ... but i've never cried for me.

Mark:

The tears will come, it is a process. You have the courage and the inner strength to process this. Don't beat yourself up and don't put yourself under pressure. It will come, just as spring comes after winter. You have had some good break throughs my friend.

Peter

Mark crying is good Let it flow. Tom

we're here for you man

I wanted to echo BP, we are here for you. Anytime man!

wall of rock
solid
ungiving
unbending

how can i help him if i won't allow myself to reach him?

Mark,

I've never spoken to you before, but you just made me cry. I've hugged my teddy bear many times and cried. Sometimes it comes from out of nowhere. I guess I didn't expect it to happen even now. But it did. I feel for you and with you.

God bless