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#167435 - 07/18/07 09:55 AM so far
jessedawg Offline
Guest

Registered: 07/17/07
Posts: 345
Loc: New York
Im surprized that so far I havent been able to come up with any reason or argument about this place. so far alot of good well thought out responses to my stupid questions, nobody seems threatening, Im glad I came back today- I didnt think I would. Cant help but to wonder whats the impresson of me- not that it matters much, just that Im expecting any minute now the insults and name calling to start flying, I dont think Ive said anything wrong yet and dont think Ive given up much info but I cant and wonder what you all must be thinking of me and in my mind its all bad things

_________________________
Firefighters - your worst nightmare is just another day at the office.

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#167437 - 07/18/07 09:58 AM Re: so far [Re: jessedawg]
pain4ever Offline


Registered: 04/05/01
Posts: 1032
Jesse,

Without sounding too condicending...you are a good guy with a lot of issues that are not your fault. You seem to be a very smart person but you know what? What we think does not matter...what you think of yourself is what matters.

Brian

_________________________
Peace and Tranquility all depends on your frame of reference.

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#167483 - 07/18/07 12:15 PM Re: so far [Re: pain4ever]
Brian Offline
Moderator Emeritus
MaleSurvivor
Registered: 05/03/01
Posts: 1563
Loc: Upstate NY
I'm very proud to say that Male Survivor is all about understanding, compassion and support. Treating people with disrespect is NOT an option here! If you are looking for abuse, there are a million other places on the web to find it; you won't find it here! \:\)

Brian

_________________________
Recovery is Possible!

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#167493 - 07/18/07 12:33 PM Re: so far [Re: Brian]
shadowkid Offline
WARNING from ModTeam, September 2013: user "Shadowkid" was exposed as a hoaxer. His entire online persona and stories of sexual abuse were fiction. We encourage you not to become emotionally concerned by anything you see in any of his posts. Thank you
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 11/18/05
Posts: 2437
dude i think ms is about opposites,what people here think and say is the exact opposite of what we say and think about ourselves. or of what we been told by those who hurt us . when i read your stuff i say yeah another fighter! guts dude ,courage ,it takes guts to try to fix this shit ,it would be so much eaiser to just give up ,but your not made that way and neither are the rest of us . i look at you and see somebody id be proud to call brother. adam

_________________________
its not hard to fall
when you float like a cannonball - damien rice

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#167496 - 07/18/07 12:35 PM Re: so far [Re: jessedawg]
MarkK Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 04/02/07
Posts: 2502
Loc: Denver, CO
Originally Posted By: jessedawg
Cant help but to wonder whats the impresson of me

I see a fellow survivor - struggling to find truth in a world that has fed him nothing but lies. A comrade. I'd use the word "brother" but it has BAAAAD connotations for me.

Suffice it to say I see a complete equal who deserves to be heard, and one I already look forward to hearing more from.

M


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#167500 - 07/18/07 12:41 PM Re: so far [Re: shadowkid]
roadrunner Offline
Administrator Emeritus
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 05/02/05
Posts: 22045
Loc: Carlisle, PA
Jesse,

^^^ What Adam said ^^^ \:\)

We see a lot of guys come and go here, and sure, it is possible to draw some conclusions in a short time. What I see in you is a terribly hurting guy, but also one who isn't afraid to face his demons and who's willing to fight for himself.

Every single post you have made shows incredible courage. What guy likes to say what you have said? I'm scared, I was hurt, I feel it was my fault, I don't know what to do, I need help. You're doing the things that are good for you, and that takes a lot of guts and strength.

And no, no one here will insult you or blame you. We are a community aiming to help each other out, and if anyone shows up who isn't into that, well, mods like Brian show him the door pretty quick.

Much love,
Larry

_________________________
Nobody living can ever stop me
As I go walking my freedom highway.
Nobody living can make me turn back:
This land was made for you and me.
(Woody Guthrie)

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#167537 - 07/18/07 01:30 PM Re: so far [Re: MarkK]
Scoutvictim Offline
Guest

Registered: 06/04/07
Posts: 434
Loc: St. Louis, Missouri
Jesse,

I have not made any comments on your posts the last two days, but I have read them and all the responses. I havn't jumped in because most of the guys who have, say it much better than I could.

My take...

*I see a guy who is trying to deal with many issues.

*I see the struggle you are having in your mind.

*I see a guy who is trying to minimize the abuse.

*I see a fire fighter(from your avatar) who is trying to "go it alone".

*I see a man who has realized "going it alone" may not be necessary.

*I see a group of guys who are willing to reach out and help.

*I see a strong man who is beginning to realize, asking for help doesn't make you weak.

*I see a crack in your gruff exterior, reaching out for some answers.

*I see a man who reflects many of of the same feelings we all had, when we first came here.

*I see a man who finds it hard to trust.

Take your time, and we'll be here when you want our help.

Carl

_________________________
Shawn and Ben will always be in my heart....

Happiness is like peeing your pants; Everyone can see it, but only YOU feel the warmth.

Peebles, Ohio WOR alumni, Oct. 2007

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#167540 - 07/18/07 01:39 PM Re: so far [Re: Scoutvictim]
jessedawg Offline
Guest

Registered: 07/17/07
Posts: 345
Loc: New York
lol do I know you Carl?

_________________________
Firefighters - your worst nightmare is just another day at the office.

Top
#167547 - 07/18/07 01:52 PM Re: so far [Re: jessedawg]
jessedawg Offline
Guest

Registered: 07/17/07
Posts: 345
Loc: New York
What do you mean Im trying to minize the abuse?

_________________________
Firefighters - your worst nightmare is just another day at the office.

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#167559 - 07/18/07 02:37 PM Re: so far [Re: jessedawg]
Scoutvictim Offline
Guest

Registered: 06/04/07
Posts: 434
Loc: St. Louis, Missouri
Jesse,

I don't think we know each other, but based on your stats, anywhere USA could be close. LMAO \:D

Now onto the other question.

In one of your comments you said, "even if I asked for it?".

That leads me to believe you're trying to take some of the responsibility off your perpetrator or minimize his role. He was the abuser, and he took advantage of you, no matter what the mind games he played.

By coming here you have taken the first step to understanding all those mind games. Many of the guys here have dealt with the same issues you are going through, and they have some great insight.

Don't be afraid to ask questions, and hash out your feelings. We all learn at different paces, and I'm sure you will benefit from your interactions here.

Just give it time, and don't feel pressured to "get it". It will sink in when your ready for it, and I promise it will feel like a ton of bricks has been lifted off your shoulders.

Be strong, and keep searching for your answers.

Carl



Edited by Scoutvictim (07/18/07 02:40 PM)
_________________________
Shawn and Ben will always be in my heart....

Happiness is like peeing your pants; Everyone can see it, but only YOU feel the warmth.

Peebles, Ohio WOR alumni, Oct. 2007

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